Change is Good??? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
My allergy’s fine while inside.
I’ve no problem when outdoors I stride.
Then I go back indoors
And my nose says, “Up yours!”
I’m attacked, and there’s no place to hide.
Archive for the ‘Health Verse’ Category
Change is Good??? (Limerick)
Thursday, July 10th, 2014Dear Doc (Limerick)
Monday, June 16th, 2014Dear Doc (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Although surgery’s surely a grind,
It with sexting ought NOT be combined.
’Tis a practice that’s mal;
A risk to the gal
Or guy patients. I’m guessing they’d mind.
(Inspired by this story: Doctor suspended amid charges of sexting during surgery)
Limerick Ode to “I Love My Dentist Day”
Monday, June 2nd, 2014Brace yourself for “I Love My Dentist Day.” (June 2nd)
Limerick Ode to “I Love My Dentist Day”
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Some holidays offer delight,
And others are likely to bite:
Love My Dentist Day’s one
That is NOT packed with fun,
So I brush the day off like a mite.
(You might also enjoy my Dental Deal and my Biting Limerick.)
And don’t forget about National Toothache Day (February 9th) and Dentists Day (March 6th.)
Sunny Limerick
Tuesday, May 27th, 2014Sunny Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I confess that I’m really not one
To use sunscreen, but please don’t make fun.
My skin’s still protected;
The scheme I’ve selected
Is hide and stay out of the sun.
Happy Sun Screen Day! (May 27)
UPDATE: “Don’t Fry Day” falls on the Friday before Memorial Day.
Happy National Maritime Day! (Limerick)
Thursday, May 22nd, 2014A limerick about the ups and downs of going to sea, just in time for National Maritime Day:
A queasy man, drawn to the sea,
Being lured by its lore made a plea:
“I’ve an ocean trip notion,
But all of that motion!
Please doc, keep me mal de mer-free.”
Cursing’s Healthy, I Swear (Limerick)
Thursday, May 15th, 2014Cursing’s Healthy, I Swear (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
New research, Brit experts declare,
Has revealed that it’s healthy to swear.
So you damn SOBs,
No more slamming my ease
With the expletive. Carpers beware!
Fried Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, January 19th, 2014It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A man who liked food that was fried…*
or
A woman shunned food that was fried…*
or
A fellow appeared to be fried…*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Fried Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A young foodie shunned meals that were fried
And would constantly mock and deride
People fond of cuisine
Neither wholesome nor lean,
Right up to the moment she died.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
A Spa To Hiss (Limerick)
Wednesday, October 30th, 2013If being wrapped in pythons would enhance your massage experience, do I have a spa for you! Get yourself right over to the Bali Heritage Reflexology and Spa in Jakarta, Indonesia, which claims that snake-draping combats stress.
A Spa To Hiss (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Oh joy! Here’s a spa to avoid:
When massaging you, snakes are deployed.
Yes, they drape you in snakes,
Claiming fear aids your aches.
You feel great … right until you’re destroyed.
Limerick Ode To The Posture Police
Wednesday, August 14th, 2013It seems fitting, somehow, that I read about the LumoBack Sensor on International Nagging Day. It “straps around your lower waist to track your posture and vibrates whenever you slouch.”
Limerick Ode To The Posture Police
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The LumoBack Sensor’s a grouch—
It nags and berates when I slouch:
By dispensing bad vibes,
It poor-posture proscribes.
Shouldn’t slouching be cool on a couch?
*****
Note from Mad Kane: I’ve never actually tried this gadget. For all I know, having your “lower waist” (as opposed to your upper waist?) vibrate is a delightful experience.
Cheesy Limerick
Tuesday, June 4th, 2013Happy National Cheese Day! (June 4th)
Cheesy Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man with a weakness for cheese
Ate some brie and then started to wheeze.
He refused to admit
‘Twas an allergy fit.
His autopsy-doc disagrees.
Note: There’s also a National Cheese Lover’s Day, which is celebrated on January 20th.
Stop Smoking, Already! (Limerick)
Thursday, May 30th, 2013Here’s a limerick to celebrate World No Tobacco Day. (May 31st)
Stop Smoking, Already!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Please stop smoking already. Don’t dicker.
Tobacco will end your life quicker.
Have a heart, as I air
This advice, cuz I care:
Be kind to your lungs and your ticker.
Embedded In Sleeplessness (Limerick)
Wednesday, June 27th, 2012My insomnia blankets the night.
Slumber teases — declines to alight.
So I toss and I turn
In my bed, as I yearn
For release from my sleep-deprived plight.
(Prompted by Theme Thursday’s “beds.”)
Musical Exile (Limerick)
Saturday, June 16th, 2012I usually avoid this topic, but dVerse prompted me to write this far-from-funny limerick:
Musical Exile
By Madeleine Begun Kane
How I long to be back in that chair,
Playing symphony music — longhair.
But my oboe career
Was pilfered, I fear—
Tearful exile by injuries’ snare.
Limerick Ode To National Corn on the Cob Day
Monday, June 11th, 2012Today, June 11, is National Corn on the Cob Day.
Limerick Ode To National Corn On The Cob Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s Corn on the Cob Day today–
A fine dish for a summer buffet.
I’m guessing its gloss
Comes from firms that sell floss.
Do they secretly root for decay?
Sun-Tanned Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, May 6th, 2012It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A gal with a very deep tan…*
or
A guy with a very deep tan…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Sun-Tanned Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal with a very deep tan
Was hoping to pick up a man.
But the guys got one look,
And that’s all that it took:
Wrinkled skin made her look like their gran.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
UPDATE: July 3rd is Stay Out Of The Sun Day.
Nude Yoga? Yikes! (Limerick)
Thursday, March 29th, 2012Yoga’s been in the news quite a bit lately. Is it good for you? Is it bad for you? Should you purchase some fancy yoga garb and skip the actual yoga?
But the oddest story so far is this one about naked yoga classes in South Park Slope, Brooklyn, New York.
Nude Yoga? Yikes!
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Take a yoga class naked? How scary!
I confess that the thought makes me wary.
Yes I’ll gladly condone
Nude yoga alone.
But in public? I’m sorry. Too hairy.
(If you’re in Brooklyn and want to study yoga in a more modest fashion, check out my niece’s Crown Heights Fitness.)
Related Posts: A Fountain Of Face-Yoga Youth? and Yoga For What?
Campaigning For Limericks (Limerick-Off Monday)
Sunday, February 12th, 2012It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus the Honorable Mentions.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, you can find some helpful resources listed here.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A woman who ran a campaign…*
or
A fellow who ran a campaign…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Campaigning For Limericks
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman who ran a campaign
To sell drugs that were good for the brain
Was stunned and quite pissed
At the side effect list.
She flushed pills and her job down the drain.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
House To Close Its Doors (Limerick)
Thursday, February 9th, 2012Fox’s medical drama House is finally coming to an end. So it’s confession time: I hate House.
In fact, I loathe all medical dramas, doctor comedies, and any other show about sick people. Why? Because the mere mention of symptoms makes me start feeling them. So if I want to avoid real life doctors, I have to stay far away from the fake ones.
House To Close Its Doors (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though it’s not my intention to grouse,
I detest doctor dramas, like House:
TV ailments and ills
Make me itch, give me chills.
WebMD, here I come — Where’s my mouse?
