MAD KANE’S HUMOR BLOG

Bugged
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Mosquitos are on the attack.
They have bitten my arms and my back.
You may call ‘em God’s creatures —
These venomous  leechers — 
I’m tired of being their snack.

(I’ve been bugged by mosquitos before.)

(Inspired by Manic Monday’s “bug.”)

Technorati Tags: Mosquito Humor, Bug Limerick, Insect Bites

Do you want to lose weight?  Then I recommend that you watch Gordon Ramsay’s new Fox show Kitchen Nightmares during dinner.  As the good Gordon might (and often does) say, “Oh my God!”

Now my husband Mark and I are fans of Ramsay’s other show Hell’s Kitchen. But other than the presence of Ramsay himself, everything that makes Hell’s Kitchen so much fun — the  competition among chefs whom you get to know and root for throughout the season — is missing from Kitchen Nightmares.  What’s left (at least in episode 1) is numerous nausea-inducing scenes featuring rancid food and roughly gazillion roaches and flies. 

Of course, by the end of the show Ramsay and his team of miracle workers turn the dive-of-the-week into a restaurant you wouldn’t be afraid to dine in.

What I can’t figure out is what the Manhattan restaurant featured in week 1 (Indian restaurant Dillons, reborn as Purnima) was doing in business before the makeover.  Doesn’t New York City have restaurant inspectors?  I sure hope so, because that’s where I live.

And now it’s time for a limerick:

Restaurant Nightmare
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I must flee this buffet. Please, let’s go.
A mouse just ran by and … oh no!
I spotted a roach
As it tried to encroach
On my sole. What’s that thing on your toe?

(You can find more of my food humor here and more of my media humor here.)

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And now some links, for your reading (and viewing) pleasure:
* Carnival of the Insanities
* Carnival Of Satire
* Carnival of Humor
* Blog Carnival of Observations On Life
* All Women Blogging Carnival
* Carnival of Family Life

Technorati Tags: Kitchen Nightmares, Hell’s Kitchen, Divey Restaurants, Dining Out Humor, Broadcast TV Humor, Media Humor, Gordon Ramsay, Fox Television, Insects, Roaches, Flies, Weight Loss Humor, New York City Restaurant, Restaurant Inspection, Buffet

Bugged By Mosquitos (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Mosquitos are driving me mad.
Seems a zillion are biting me—bad!
Sprays and lotions don’t work;
They keep chomping and lurk,
While ignoring my husband—the cad!

Technorati Tags: Bugs, Mosquitos, Insect Bites, Outdoors, Summer Gripes, Summer Humor, Insect and Bug Humor, Husband and Wife Humor