Posts Tagged ‘Food Humor’

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: GRILL/GRILLE at the end of any one line

Saturday, March 18th, 2017

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using GRILL/GRILLE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to POWER, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best POWER-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on April 2, 2017 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 1, 2017 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

When I tried to return a gas grill,
I felt burned when the owner said “Chill!”
So I countered with heat:
“It won’t light! You’re a cheat!
“Take it back, or you’ll soon need a will.”

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Where Have All The Good Chocolate Bars Gone? (Limerick)

Friday, December 9th, 2016

I would love a good chocolate bar,
But most of it tastes under par.
Are my standards too strict?
I confess, I feel licked;
Find a bonbon unmarred? None so far!

Me Celebrate Greasy Foods Day? Not On Your Life! (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 25th, 2016

I don’t understand the appeal
Of a greasy and fat-laden meal.
Yet folks by the tons
Risk getting the runs
From fried items, with heart-stopping zeal.

Happy Greasy Foods Day! (October 25)

It’s Bologna Day — No Baloney! (Limerick)

Monday, October 24th, 2016

At the taste of bologna, I groan.
Processed meats make me cringe, gag, and moan.
Yet for some, they’re a treat.
Keep your mystery meat,
Else my face shall be meeting my “throne.”

Happy National Bologna Day! (October 24)

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SACK at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

Sunday, August 21st, 2016

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SACK at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to HEAT, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best HEAT-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on September 4, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 3, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

A gal in the mood for a snack
Was tempted to purchase a sack
Filled with pretzels and chips,
Which would go to her hips.
How she wished it would go to her rack.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

A Mixed Up Baker (Limerick)

Wednesday, July 13th, 2016

“Please help me get out of my fix.
I was fixing to bake with a mix,
And I thought I had butter
Behind all the clutter.
May I borrow a couple of sticks?”

“Your question is very confusing,”
Was the answer. “What mix are you using
That requires two sticks
Of butter? I’d nix
Such a mix and just stick to your boozing.”

Spilling The Beans About “Eat Beans Day” (Limerick)

Sunday, July 3rd, 2016

Happy “Eat Beans Day!”

A man was incensed because beans
Caused an ailment he’d had since his teens;
His digestion was marred
To the point he was barred
From small rooms, though allowed in latrines.

Asparagus Day? Why? (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 24th, 2016

Asparagus doesn’t appeal to me,
And it guts what might be a good meal to me.
Brussels sprouts can be yummy.
With brocc’li I’m chummy.
But asparagus spears are “no deal” to me.

May 24 is Asparagus Day.

The Nose Knows (Limerick)

Saturday, April 30th, 2016

I follow the smells where they lead me.
“I want you,” I cry. They don’t heed me.
Then my senses all quicken;
It’s barbecue chicken!
How I long to say, “Neighbors, please feed me.”

Happy National Sense Of Smell Day! (last Saturday of April)

Limerick Ode To Chopsticks

Saturday, February 6th, 2016

Happy National Chopsticks Day! (February 6)

Eating East Asian food drives me nuts.
The reason? Alas, I’m a klutz
And am dreadful with chopsticks;
I frequently drop sticks…
So must stick to a fork like a putz.

Limerick Ode To Brussels Sprouts

Sunday, January 31st, 2016

Happy “Eat Brussels Sprouts Day!”

Though for most of my life I had doubts
About choking down cooked Brussels sprouts,
I flout them no more;
Well prepared, they’re top drawer.
Now I tout ’em instead. No more pouts!

Cheesy Limerick

Wednesday, January 20th, 2016

A man who should never eat cheese,
Ignores ev’ry cough and each wheeze
That comes in reaction
And once led to traction;
He can’t hack cheese-attraction disease.

Happy National Cheese Lovers Day, which is celebrated on January 20th.

Note: National Cheese Day falls on June 4th.

Gunning For A Hot, Spicy Meal (Limerick)

Saturday, January 16th, 2016

My “Dear Chef” limerick, just in time for International Hot and Spicy Food Day (Jan. 16):

Dear Chef:
By Madeleine Begun Kane

My pref’rence is food that is hot;
Not in contrast to cold, but that’s got
Lots of tongue-burning spice.
This Thai entree with rice
Should attack me. Is THAT your best shot?

Happy National Pastry Day (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 9th, 2015

A pastry chef promised to can
All her plans to procure a nice tan,
Cuz fresh wrinkles appeared
Ev’ry day, which she feared
Came from baking like cake in a pan.

Happy National Pastry Day. (December 9)

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: FLAKE at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

Sunday, November 29th, 2015

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using FLAKE at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner December 13th, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 12, at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

A gal who was rather a flake
Always screwed up whatever she’d bake,
And whenever she’d try
To feed someone her pie,
Their response would be, “This takes the cake.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Enforcer Madness (Limerick)

Thursday, October 22nd, 2015

Headline of the Day: “Heavily armed drug cops raid retiree’s garden, seize okra plants.”

If you’re targeting reefer in mass,
Keep in mind: It’s best NOT to harass
Those with innocent crops.
So be well-informed cops.
Learn the dif between okra and grass.

Let Them Eat … Insects? (Limerick)

Thursday, October 15th, 2015

Are bugs more nutritious than meat?
In a study on what we should eat,
The answer was “yes.”
I am bugged and confess
That I’d sooner eat peat or concrete.

Limerick Ode To “World Egg Day”

Friday, October 9th, 2015

Happy World Egg Day! (October 9)

On “World Egg Day” a Facebooker begs:
“Kindly stop cracking wise about eggs.”
I’ll concede we’ve been laying
Some eggs, but quit braying;
We aren’t yet down to the dregs.

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SPILL at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

Saturday, October 3rd, 2015

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using SPILL at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

A chef, upon spotting a spill
From a gin bottle, started to grill
All his washers and cooks,
Asking “Which of you crooks
Made this mess?” But his proof remained nil.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

A Limerick To Help You Celebrate “Eat Outside Day” (August 31)

Sunday, August 30th, 2015

Brace yourself! Tomorrow, August 31, is Eat Outside Day.

Although eating outside can be fun,
My enjoyment is quickly undone
By insects that join
To dine on one’s loin.
Just one bite, and I’ll bug out and run.