Posts Tagged ‘Horse Humor’

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: NEED OR KNEAD OR KNEED at the end of any one line

Saturday, February 23rd, 2019

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using NEED OR KNEAD OR KNEED at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to POULTRY, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best POULTRY-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on March 10, 2019 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, March 9, 2019 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

I’m in pain, so I need you to knead
All my muscles. Then get me some weed.
I was kneed in the back
By some guy at the track,
And it feels like I fell off a steed.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode to the Horse

Saturday, December 13th, 2014

Happy “National Day of the Horse.”

Limerick Ode to the Horse
By Madeleine Begun Kane

It’s the “National Day of the Horse.”
Till I’m hoarse, I of course shall endorse.
On the racecourse or farm
Or police force, what charm!
It had better not be your main course.

Limerick Okays (Limerick-Off Monday)

Saturday, June 14th, 2014

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

An employee who needed okays…*

or

A fellow was dating two Kays…*

or

The races he likes are 5Ks…*

or

I was stumped by a word with three Ks…*

or

Never act without getting okays…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Okays
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A horse trainer needed okays,
But his boss kept him waiting for days.
Those delays made him bridle:
“That hack is so idle!”
In response he was saddled with nays.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

UPDATE: March 23 is OK Day.

Unpersuasive Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Saturday, May 19th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman who tried to persuade…*

or

A fellow who tried to persuade…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Unpersuasive Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman who tried to persuade
A banker to come to her aid
Got no help with a loan—
Not so much as a bone.
No bucks for her horse bus’ness. Nayed!

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Reining In Your Returns (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 10th, 2012

A horseback-riding reader asked me to write a tax-related limerick. Here’s what I came up with:

Reining In Your Returns (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

To the folks who find horseback transcendent,
Please beware, you could be a defendant,
If when doing your tax,
You err to the max
By declaring your horse a “dependent.”

A Horse Of A Different Color

Sunday, October 21st, 2007

These two horse-related poems were loosely inspired by this week’s Totally Optional Prompt:

First, a limerick:

A Horse of A Different Color
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There are folks who succumb to a weakness
For races like Belmont and Preakness.
But there’s only one horse
Race I’ll bet on—the course
To the White House—a sign of my geekness?

And now, a haiku about New York City:

Trumpeting cars horns.
Clip-clopping carriage horses.
Central Park Sunday.

(You can find more of my horse humor here.)

Only In Queens, New York (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 15th, 2007

Only In Queens, New York  (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“Wanna ride?” says a cop on the force.
I decline, though politely, of course.
I am tired, it’s true,
But my joints do not rue
My refusal. He’s riding a horse.

(True story:  A New York City cop on horseback offered me a ride after I complimented him on his beautiful (and gigantic) horse. Though tempted for roughly a nano-second, I took pity on my back and said a cowardly “no thanks.”)