Archive for the ‘Smell Humor’ Category

The Nose Knows (Limerick)

Saturday, April 30th, 2016

I follow the smells where they lead me.
“I want you,” I cry. They don’t heed me.
Then my senses all quicken;
It’s barbecue chicken!
How I long to say, “Neighbors, please feed me.”

Happy National Sense Of Smell Day! (last Saturday of April)

An Essential Holiday (Limerick)

Monday, March 21st, 2016

It’s essential to celebrate smells–
Just the good ones, of course; Nothing quells
A good mood like a stink,
Which might possibly shrink
The terrain where your fella’s brain dwells.

Happy National Fragrance Day! (March 21)

This Invention Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test (Limerick)

Saturday, June 14th, 2014

This Invention Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m vexed and a little perplexed
By the concept of smells sent by text.
I do not mean to vent,
But don’t send me a scent,
Or our friendship is apt to be exed.

(Harvard engineering professor David Edwards and co-inventor Rachel Fields have invented an aromatic mobile messaging device called an oPhone that sends and receives scents.)

This Trend Stinks (Limerick)

Thursday, June 6th, 2013

I’m both steamed and in a lather over this stinky new “cleansing reduction” trend. I don’t know about you, but in our house, daily showers are a fixture.

This Trend Stinks (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Here’s a trend that I’d sure like to quell:
Bidding show’ring each day a farewell.
Daily cleansing’s essential
And highly prudential:
If you don’t shower daily, you smell.

A Limerick Meal (Poetry Prompt)

Wednesday, March 10th, 2010

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this as a first line:

A wealthy old fellow named Bart…

Here’s mine:

A Limerick Meal
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A wealthy old fellow named Bart
Began ev’ry meal with a fart.
When guests came to dine
They’d pretend all was fine
Cuz they hoped to inherit his art.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.

Weeding Out Crazy Lawsuits (Outdoor Smoking Ban Limerick)

Saturday, September 1st, 2007

As a result of a neighbor’s lawsuit, a Swedish woman can no longer smoke in most of her garden. (And you thought the United States was a litigious country.)

Stockholm – A Swedish woman has been banned by court order from smoking in large parts of her own garden following a complaint from a neighbour…

… The neighbour, a lawyer, filed the complaint with the court in Vaxjo, in southern Sweden, saying he was obliged to wear a mask in his garden when the neighbour lit up.

Weeding Out Crazy Lawsuits (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A cig-hating fellow from Sweden
Sued a gal cause she smoked during weedin’.
Now smoking’s been banned
On much of her land.
What’s next? Litigation o’er readin’?

This Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test

Tuesday, August 7th, 2007

According to this odd story, a smoking ban in British pubs has managed to make British bars smell even worse.  Apparently, the acrid smell of smoke is a delight compared to all the foul odors smoke used to mask: “stale food and beer, damp, sweat and body odour, drains and – how do you put this nicely – flatulence.”

So what’s the solution?  You might think cleaning supplies would be in order. But you would be wrong.  Instead, they’re pumping perfume into 2000 pubs — the essence of  “leather, freshly cut grass, and ocean breeze fragrances.”

This cries out for a limerick, don’t you think?

This Doesn’t Pass The Smell Test (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The stench of Brit pubs once was hidden
By smoke, but now smoking’s forbidden,
And since folks can’t abide
The foul odor, they hide
It with pumped-in-perfume.  I’m not kiddin’.

(You can find more of my food and drink limericks and humor here.)