Archive for the ‘Seasons Humor’ Category

Cold Weather Blues (Limerick)

Friday, November 18th, 2022

In New York, winter’s hit prematurely.
(That’s a long way of saying it’s early.)
I’ve already grown weary
Of weather this dreary.
(I’m sorry for sounding so surly.)

Here We Go Again With The Clocks (Haiku)

Saturday, November 5th, 2022

Still Bugged By Mosquitoes (Limerick)

Monday, July 11th, 2022

Wherever I go (or I’ve been)
Bugs attack me, ignoring my kin.
I scratch and I itch
And I can’t help but bitch…
Cuz mosquitoes get under my skin!

Update: August 20 is World Mosquito Day.

Loathing Latkes (Limerick)

Monday, May 2nd, 2022

Someone dared me to write a latke limerick. (No need to check your calendars. Hanukkah’s still in December.)

A latke debate has emerged:
“Eat latkes with sugar,” Mark urged.
“Using sugar sounds weird,”
Sev’ral said. Others cheered.
As for me, latkes ought to be purged.

Yet Another Weather Complaint (Limerick)

Friday, March 25th, 2022

Dear spring, I am feeling abused,
And I’m NOT even slightly amused;
It’s late March, as you know.
Yet they’re mentioning snow.
So of laziness YOU stand accused.

An Age Old Protest (Limerick)

Saturday, March 12th, 2022

I’ve been told to “Spring forward!” Can’t do!
With my knees? Are you kidding? I’m through:
No more jumping and running
And springing! I’m shunning
Such acts. You mean “clock movement?” Whew!

Something ELSE To Worry About (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 9th, 2022

If only I were making this story up: Headline: “Giant spiders expected to drop from sky across the East Coast this spring”

“Giant spiders,” East Coast-bound, this spring;
Using parachute-webs, down they’ll swing.
“Invasive,” yet “harmless?”
I’m far from alarmless
O’er spider hordes — beasts on the wing.

Withered By Weather (Limerick)

Tuesday, March 8th, 2022

I wrote this yesterday (Monday) when NYC temps reached 67:

It is well over 60, and so
You might think spring’s arrived. Sorry! No!
With the outlook corrected,
A cold wave’s projected:
The forecast for Wednesday is “snow.”

Snow’s Afoot! (Limerick)

Thursday, January 27th, 2022

A Nor’easter is headed here soon.
With snow we are set to be strewn;
Twelve inches expected!
I’m feeling dejected,
As forecasters breathlessly swoon.

Evanescent Snow (Limerick)

Friday, December 24th, 2021

Just a smidgen of snow fell last night,
Leaving lawns, walks, and roads pristine white.
But their coating soon vanished,
As if it were banished.
By first light, snow took flight; none’s in sight.

Mid-Autumn Blues (Limerick)

Thursday, November 4th, 2021

It’s merely mid-Autumn and yet,
The chill in the air brings the threat
That winter is lurking
And soon will be working
To make us all shovel and sweat.

Fun In The Sun? (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 31st, 2021

“I warned you: That lotion’s been banned,
And your skin is too pale to get tanned.
No beach, I beseech you!
But words never reach you.
You bury your head in the sand.”

Snow Musings (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 26th, 2021

I looked out the window. Saw snow.
How severe is the forecast? Don’t know.
I’d prefer a short flurry.
But why should I worry?
With Covid, there’s nowhere to go.

Bound To Be Snowbound (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 16th, 2020

The snow in New York has begun.
We’ve been warned that the storm won’t be fun.
I’ve no forecasting skill;
My sci-knowledge is nil.
So my snowfall prediction? A ton!

Rain Whine (Limerick)

Thursday, June 20th, 2019

The weather’s been putrid this week
And it needs a lot more than a tweak.
It’s unbearably wet,
I’m covered in sweat,
And my sidewalk resembles a creek.

More Snow? Oh, Shove It! (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 21st, 2018

I’m just back from the front of our house,
Where the heavens continue to douse
Our brick steps and our walk.
Though at shov’ling I balk,
I heave snow-mountains — NOT that I’d grouse.

That Snow Job They Call Spring (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 21st, 2018

Spring’s begun with a bang! I’m annoyed,
Cuz more shov’ling I’d rather avoid,
But since stuff from above’ll
Not stop, need my shovel.
That tool, alas, must be deployed!

First Day Of Spring? NOT In New York! (Limerick)

Tuesday, March 20th, 2018

It’s the first day of spring? I don’t buy it,
Cuz the elements surely defy it;
Twelve inches of snow
Are on route here, so NO!
Don’t insist that it’s spring. I’ll deny it.

Make It Stop! (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 7th, 2018

“I am sick of the snow! Make it stop,”
I complained to a neighborhood cop.
“I’m sorry, Ms. Kane.
Weather’s NOT my domain.
Try that guy in the sky — it’s HIS op.”

Blizzard 2018 (Limerick)

Friday, January 5th, 2018

I’m bracing to walk out the door
And face up to my shoveling chore.
How I’d love to ignore it,
Stay warm and ‘offshore’ it.
But it’s war; time to even the score.

Update: Last June, when I was bleeding all over the street and staring in horror at my exposed ulna, I couldn’t have imagined ever managing to shovel snow again. But I just did it. Yay!