Posts Tagged ‘Seasonal Humor’

Seasonal Gripe (Limerick)

Monday, October 23rd, 2017

It’s summer. It’s winter. It’s fall;
In the course of one week we’ve had all
Of those seasons and more.
What’s a calendar for?
I once knew, but no longer recall.

This Weather’s For The Birds! (Limerick)

Monday, March 28th, 2016

Though it’s springtime, the temp’rature’s low.
It’s damp, and the wind’s all a-blow.
And I swear that I heard
These words chirped by a bird:
“For THIS I flew north? I hate snow!”

Hope Springs Eternal (Limerick)

Saturday, March 19th, 2016

Though tomorrow’s the first day of spring,
My seasonal thoughts can’t take wing
Cuz of snow-forecast-blues-men
And wet blanket newsmen.
Are they wrong? To that dream I shall cling.

February Bashing

Monday, February 1st, 2016

After seeing a “Happy February” post, I suddenly remembered an ancient humor piece of mine about February. So I dug through my archives and found this column I sold to the Buffalo News way back in 1995. It feels like it was written by a different person: February Bashing.

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: LIES or BELIES or RELIES at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

Saturday, December 12th, 2015

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using LIES or BELIES or RELIES at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write a themed limerick related to any December holiday, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best holiday-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick-Off Award Winner on December 27, 2015, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 26, 2015, at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

The weatherman forecast clear skies.
But I wasn’t surprised by the cries
And the shrieks and the bawling
When rain started falling;
I’ve weathered the weather guys’ lies.

Please feel free to write your own limerick(s) using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Staten Island Chuck the Groundhog Lives (Limerick)

Monday, February 2nd, 2015

There’s been a Groundhog Day rules change at the Staten Island Zoo, in the wake of last year’s groundhog death at the klutzy hands of Mayor Bill de Blasio:

Staten Island Chuck the Groundhog Lives (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Seems the zoos of New York had their fill
Of Mayor-caused Groundhog Day-kill.
Last year’s groundhog is dead,
So “no holding,” they said.
“We are Chucking your touching rights, Bill.”

Shoveling Duty (Limerick)

Monday, January 26th, 2015

Shoveling Duty (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

It’s snowing, alas and alack,
And I just finished shov’ling — can’t slack
During storms this severe.
But I did it. Oh dear!
All the snow I removed has come back.

*****

Blizzard in progress.
I resent New York City
resembling Fargo.

*****

Oboe-playing years
armed my shoulders for shov’ling,
but failed to prep mind.

I Knew It Couldn’t Last (Limerick)

Wednesday, September 3rd, 2014

This summer’s weather in New York City, especially August, has been astonishingly pleasant. And then September hit.

I Knew It Couldn’t Last (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I was right with my weather suspicions;
We’ve reverted to dreadful conditions.
High humidity, heat,
Heavy T-storms compete,
As we weather their juxtapositions.

My Unreasonable Complaint (Limerick)

Sunday, June 22nd, 2014

My Unreasonable Complaint (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m not hot. There’s no sweat on my brow.
I’m not cold. Yes, I’m forced to allow
That the last sev’ral days
Have had moderate rays.
So what will I bitch about now?

Sunny Limerick

Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

Sunny Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I confess that I’m really not one
To use sunscreen, but please don’t make fun.
My skin’s still protected;
The scheme I’ve selected
Is hide and stay out of the sun.

Happy Sun Screen Day! (May 27)

UPDATE: “Don’t Fry Day” falls on the Friday before Memorial Day.

Weathering Humor

Thursday, February 13th, 2014

In a recent Washington Post Style Invitational contest, we were challenged to invent and define weather-related terms. You can read the excellent winning entries here.

And here are my losing entries:

Snow-Brawl: Two arctic storms battle it out.

Frizzly: Just damp enough to frizz your hair.

Withering Heights: Too miserably hot out to leave the house.

Itticane: Gender neutral term for hurricane, favored by most feminists. (Some feminists prefer Himmicane.)

Bellweather: Sunny forecast.

Rain Cower: Hide from a storm, usually under storefront awnings.

Cold and Bothered (Quatrain)

Tuesday, January 7th, 2014

Cold and Bothered (Quatrain)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I live in a town where it’s pleasant to stroll.
We do most of our errands on foot.
But it’s frightfully cold. “Let’s stay home,” I cajole.
Forget milk! Let’s be smart and stay put.

Spring? You’re Kidding, Right? (Limerick)

Tuesday, March 19th, 2013

Spring? You’re Kidding, Right? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Spring is legally set to begin,
Which in light of the weather’s a sin:
Last night we had snow,
Sleet, and ice here and so
There’s a seasonal mix-up herein.

Limerick Ode To Groundhog Day

Saturday, February 2nd, 2013

Limerick Ode To Groundhog Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There’s an animal hogging the news
And casting a shadow on views.
It’s the groundhog, of course:
Our annual source
Of featherbrained seasonal clues.

Happy Groundhog Day! (February 2nd.) And for more groundhog poetry, visit DVerse Poets.

Weathering New York Weather (Limerick)

Thursday, December 6th, 2007

Weathering New York Weather
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The weather outside isn’t nice,
And the walks are all covered with ice.
I seem to recall
That it’s technic’ly fall.
Would I leave New York City? No dice!

(You can find more of my seasonal (and holiday) humor here and more of my New York humor here.)

The Joys Of Winter

Wednesday, October 31st, 2007

There’s nothing quite like a tough mental challenge.  And I sure had a good time with this one, prompting me to write something (in my case, a limerick) using these three words: phone, stumbled and windy.

The Joys Of Winter
By Madeleine Begun Kane

It was windy and snowy.  I stumbled.
Then I fell and my keys and phone tumbled
And slid down the ice.
I yelled words not so nice.
“How rude!” an old passerby grumbled.

And speaking of winter, it’s almost time to start worrying about your office Christmas party.