A jovial student, while high,
Said “By Jove, I’m a real lucky guy!
I’ve been acing each test
And I’m feath’ring my nest
Using scams, with the help of AI.”
Archive for the ‘Money & Finance Humor’ Category
“Highly” Happy Limerick
Friday, July 10th, 2026Failed Investment (Limerick)
Wednesday, July 8th, 2026A young fellow is swimming in debt,
Cuz he recklessly made a big bet
On a bus’ness that failed.
All his partners have bailed,
And he’s now been assailed by regret.
Greedy Limerick
Sunday, June 28th, 2026An old man whose largesse is well-known,
Has grown children who constantly moan
About “pushover dad.”
They are greedily mad
That he’s “squand’ring” what THEY “ought to own.”
Connected Limerick
Thursday, June 25th, 2026A young man with connections galore
Is successful, but always wants more.
Though the guy’s full of bull,
His abundance of pull
Guarantees that he’ll never be poor.
Replacement Theory? (Limerick)
Saturday, June 13th, 2026“I’m afraid that I’ll soon be replaced
By AI, though I always have aced
My reviews at the job,”
Said a guy, with a sob…
“So I need a rich lover post-haste!”
Iced Out (Limerick)
Thursday, May 28th, 2026“Since fresh ice cream’s my favorite vice,
My own creamery sure would be nice.
But my blood sugar’s high,”
Said the man, with a sigh.
“So I’m putting that pipe dream on ice.”
Dismay About May (Limerick)
Sunday, May 24th, 2026My Dear Spring: I am rip-roaring mad,
Cuz the weather you’re bringing’s been bad.
It’s late May, and we’re still
Using heat. Such a chill
Is inflating our bill. You’re a cad!
The Obnoxious Landlord (Limerick)
Thursday, May 14th, 2026When a thoughtless young landlord can’t sleep,
He’ll start blowing his horn. He’s a creep!
And when worn tenants gripe
About noise, he’ll just snipe:
“Read your lease! That’s why rent is so cheap!”
The Curmudgeon (Limerick)
Friday, April 10th, 2026A “connected” curmudgeon named Frank.
Had a high-level job at a bank.
His performance was panned;
He deserved to be canned…
Yet (surprise!) he survived when ranks shrank.
My Taxing Muse (Limerick)
Thursday, April 2nd, 2026I should write, but I’ve nothing to say;
Inspiration is waning today.
My damn muse is a pill!
She won’t help me until
I’m done filing my taxes. Oy Vey!
Drumming Up Claims (Limerick)
Thursday, March 5th, 2026(Note: James is fictitious!)
An obnoxious old drummer named James
Enjoyed lawsuits & filing false claims.
He would wear people down,
Till he sued the wrong “clown.”
He’s been drummed out of town; life in flames.
Stock Complaint (Limerick)
Thursday, September 18th, 2025Whined a woman, “I’m knee-deep in hock.
And I’m told that it’s time to take stock.
Not the ‘stock exchange’ kind;
That’s the source of my bind.
I’m behind cuz I fell for that crock!”
Penniless Limerick
Sunday, June 1st, 2025Since production of pennies is ending,
Is it time for some idiom-mending?
Must the penny be spurned?
Nickel saved, nickel earned?
Dime for thoughts? Is “cute quarter” ascending?
Computer Insecurity (Limerick)
Saturday, November 30th, 2024Happy Computer Security Day!
It’s Computer Security Day.
Do you feel like you’re safe? I’ll bet NAY!
Thieves with bots? There are many
Who’re after each penny.
You don’t use your antennae? Oy Vey!
Another Useless “Holiday” (Limerick)
Saturday, January 27th, 2024For some inexplicable reason, today, January 27th, is “Punch The Clock Day.”
“Punch The Clock Day’s” (I’ll wager) a crock.
Why celebrate methods to dock
Someone’s pay? It’s absurd!
Moreover, I’m spurred
When awakened to punch that damn clock!
UPDATE: Limerick-Off Deadline Postponed One Week Due to Illness! New Submission Deadline: Jan. 13, 2024 Sorry! Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S at the end of any one line
Saturday, December 9th, 2023It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PERKS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PERK-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
CLUMSY, CONDEMNED, ODDS, SHAKE, WAVES.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on January 7, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 6, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S-Rhyme Limerick:
“What’s your preference? Bagels or rolls?”
Asked a bakery-bound woman. “My goal’s
A quick breakfast, then work.”
Her new boyfriend, a jerk,
Said “I favor the flavor of holes.”
And here’s my PERK-Themed Limerick:
A cocky young teen liked to smirk
And would frequently act like a jerk.
When ordered to shed
His rudeness, he said:
“I’m rich, and I’m told it’s a perk.”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
A clumsy old fellow named Ken
Was so klutzy that men now and then
Would call him a clod
And condemn him as odd,
While his ex-wife would nod an “amen.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
The Party Planner (Limerick)
Friday, November 10th, 2023A fellow was planning a bash;
Pricey food, flashy site, quite the splash!
But it didn’t go well;
Can’t have fun from a cell.
(He had funded his fete with filched cash.)
Hail To The Chef (Limerick)
Friday, October 20th, 2023The chef was a world-famous man,
Whose cuisine had its roots in Spokane.
But his famed bistro failed
And his customers bailed.
Seems success was a flash in the pan.
(International Chefs Day falls on October 20th.)
The Would-Be Borrower (Limerick)
Saturday, May 6th, 2023A gambler I know, who’s a heel,
Asked to borrow some cash for a meal:
“I lost my last dime,
But I win all the time,
So just one crappy hand’s no big deal!”
