Posts Tagged ‘Business Humor’

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: TANK at the end of any one line

Saturday, October 14th, 2017

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using TANK at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to VEGETABLES, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best VEGETABLE-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on October 29, 2017, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, October 28, 2017 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

As a banker, I’m forced to be frank:
These loan papers read like a prank.
Are you yanking my chain
With this biz plan inane?
Kiddy trike-armor? That’s gonna tank!

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Tweeting The Unconventional (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 4th, 2016

Biz advice from a mogul, by tweet:
Women eyeing that large corner suite
Should hike skirts up and wear
Bright colors. I swear
It ain’t Trump, but Barb Corc’ran. Delete!

Here’s the article that inspired this limerick: “Barbara Corcoran to female entrepreneurs: Hike up your skirts.”

Sowing Angry Customers (Limerick)

Sunday, January 17th, 2016

A limerick for Customer Service Day (January 17):

A seamstress would frequently snap
At her patrons, increasing the gap
Between income and cost.
Seems her bus’ness was lost
Cuz of failure to button her yap!

“Entrepreneur Barbie!” Are They Toying With Us?

Friday, July 11th, 2014

“Entrepreneur Barbie!” Are They Toying With Us?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The new Barbie’s an “Entrepreneur.”
Mattel claims it’s intended to spur
Young girls to create
Their own bus’ness. But wait!
Why the form-fitting hot-pink couture?

I’m NOT making this up! “Entrepreneur Barbie,” from Mattel Canada, supposedly takes aim at the glass ceiling. Alas, it clearly misses:

It’s unclear by her garb what company she runs; instead of a power suit, she sports a form-fitting, hot pink sleeveless dress, and her briefcase looks more like a designer purse. The only hint that this doll means business are her tiny tablet and smartphone accessories.

Happy National Rum Day (Limerick)

Friday, August 16th, 2013

Happy National Rum Day! (August 16)

Happy National Rum Day (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man was balled out out by his mum,
Who told him to stop making rum.
“That’s my bus’ness,” he said.
“It’s my butter and bread.”
But he chewed on it. Now he makes gum.

A Limerick Spread (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, September 9th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman was planning a spread…*

or

A fellow was planning a spread…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

A Limerick Spread
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman was planning a spread,
Meant to help push her husband ahead.
It would boost his connections.
(So said her projections.)
But it led him astray into bed.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Astute Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, June 10th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A man who was very astute…*

or

A gal who was very astute…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Astute Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who was very astute
Was stunned to be given the boot.
He dealt with that blow
By building a co
That sells shoes, so his job loss was moot.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode To Print Newspapers

Wednesday, March 23rd, 2011

Limerick Ode To Print Newspapers
By Madeleine Begun Kane

It appears that print papers are dying,
Cuz few are subscribing or buying.
Print magazines too
Keep saying adieu.
Who’s happy? The trees — they’re highflying.

(Written for Theme Thursday’s paper prompt and Miss Rumphius Effect’s tree prompt.)

UPDATE: May 16th is “Love A Tree Day.”

Parental Proposal

Monday, August 14th, 2006

The “help wanted” pages are filled with job descriptions that defy comprehension. This probably explains why so many parents can’t quite figure out what it is their children do for a living. And it can lead to parental queries like this one from my mother-in-law to my husband Mark:

“Tell me exactly what your job is. Go slowly. I have to write it down.”

Mark hadn’t switched employers or secured a promotion; he’s been doing essentially the same work for ten years. So why the sudden curiosity? Because his parents recently attended a wedding packed with inquisitive relatives. Relatives who appeared to be more interested in Mark’s career than they were in the bride and groom. …

Parental Proposal is continued here.)

Working Stiffed

Tuesday, August 8th, 2006

Finding a new job can be a daunting challenge. But if you follow my simple 21-step plan, you’ll soon be battling cranky alarm clocks, rush-hour traffic, and the “living for the weekend” daily grind.

1. Lose job.

2. Panic, freak out, and turn into a pulsating blob of hysteria. CAUTION: It’s best to do this at home — you’ll be wanting that reference.

3. Torture everyone you’ve ever met with your tale of woe. Bitch about your former boss, your boss’ boss, your lousy luck, the manipulative coworker who stole your job, the economy, and, of course, the world as we know it. Seriously consider buying a voodoo doll.

4. Perfect the art of sleeping late, parading about in slatternly garb, and doing absolutely nothing. Tell your spouse you spent the entire week working on your resume. When spouse says “Let me have a look,” say you’re still fine-tuning it.

5. Start working on resume. … (Working Stiffed is continued here.)