Posts Tagged ‘Feminism Humor’

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: BITE or BYTE at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: August 10, 2019)

Saturday, July 27th, 2019

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BITE or BYTE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to THREATS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best THREAT-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on August 11, 2019 right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, August 10, 2019 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my BITE/BYTE-rhyme limerick:

A fellow who’d spent his last dime
On a reference book about rhyme,
Wrote light verse day and night.
Some was trite. Some had bite.
But none sold, so he moved on to crime.

And here’s my THREAT-themed limerick:

“Kindly don’t call me ‘Ms.’ Call me ‘Miss,’
Said a gal with a rather loud hiss.
“All that feminist crap
Makes me sick,” went her rap.
“And I’ll sue you cuz ‘Ms.’ is a diss.”

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Distaff Limerick

Sunday, March 29th, 2015

Distaff Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If “distaff’s” a word you forget,
You needn’t search books or the net.
It’s a not-so-nice mention
Of gals. Comprehension
Is easy. Think “dissed half.” All set?

“Entrepreneur Barbie!” Are They Toying With Us?

Friday, July 11th, 2014

“Entrepreneur Barbie!” Are They Toying With Us?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The new Barbie’s an “Entrepreneur.”
Mattel claims it’s intended to spur
Young girls to create
Their own bus’ness. But wait!
Why the form-fitting hot-pink couture?

I’m NOT making this up! “Entrepreneur Barbie,” from Mattel Canada, supposedly takes aim at the glass ceiling. Alas, it clearly misses:

It’s unclear by her garb what company she runs; instead of a power suit, she sports a form-fitting, hot pink sleeveless dress, and her briefcase looks more like a designer purse. The only hint that this doll means business are her tiny tablet and smartphone accessories.

Limerick Ode To International Women’s Day

Tuesday, March 8th, 2011

Limerick Ode To International Women’s Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I nearly forgot — not sure how —
International Women’s Day — Wow!
It’s the 8th day of March —
Not a day to be arch
Or silly or zany, so Ciao!

Dotty Men

Wednesday, July 28th, 2010

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A guy in a polka dot tie…

Here’s mine. (It’s a three-verse limerick, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.):

Dotty Men
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A guy in a polka dot tie
Felt stylish, though heaven knows why.
His jacket was garish.
His pants were nightmarish.
And non-matching sneakers — oh my!

Yet he sat around mocking the gals
With some equally odd-looking pals.
“She’s too thin. She’s too fat.”
“She’s an ugly old bat.”
Can’t imagine their warped rationales.

Why do fellows behave in that way —
Scorning gals who look cuter than they?
Do they all need a shrink?
I sure hope they don’t think
It will lead to a roll in the hay.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.

Rehab For Serial Wife-Cheating? Bullox!

Friday, April 2nd, 2010

I don’t know about you, but I’m not buying Jesse James’ (or Tiger Woods’) rehab ploy:

Rehab For Serial Wife-Cheating? Bullox! (Double Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A bike-loving fellow named James
Had affairs with some numerous dames.
Though wife Sandra’s a winner,
He’s trying to spin her:
Addiction’s the problem, he claims.

Now he’s paying a whole lot of loot
For therapy — Tiger Woods’ route.
But rehab won’t fix
Those wife-cheating pricks.
My advice — just give both guys the boot.

Chick Flick Flack

Sunday, October 7th, 2007

Chick Flick Flack
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When a film’s called a chick flick, it’s meant
To appeal to most women. How bent!
I’m a gal through and through,
But those flicks make me boo,
While my husband applauds. What a gent!

(You can find more of my marriage humor here and my feminist humor here.)

Chafing At “Chick”

Friday, March 23rd, 2007

Chafing At “Chick”
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When a guy calls a woman a chick,
It strikes me as sexist and sick.
But my comments are tame;
Unless Richard’s his name,
I’m polite and I don’t call him dick.

A Squirrely Lesson

Thursday, October 26th, 2006

Being a feminist, even a moderate feminist like me, can make it tough to dodge duties unsuited to the squeamish. In my case, squirrel removal.

Like most people, I prefer my squirrels outdoors. So I wasn’t exactly pleased when a squirrel decided to invade my turf. One morning last winter, when I was barely awake and shuffling down our basement stairs, something with a bushy tail flashed past me, mere inches from my toes. So I ask you, what’s a feminist to do? Yell hysterically? Scream for help? Well, … yes. I also scrambled up the steps, slammed the door, and told myself the squirrel would find its own way out.

For the next few hours I wondered what my squirrel was up to. I even tried to talk myself into marching downstairs and facing him down. Or creeping downstairs and checking things out. Or opening the cellar door just a crack, peering down the steps, and shutting the door fast before the squirrel became suspicious.

What kind of feminist was I, I asked myself, as I paced a floor above the intruder. Surely Gloria Steinem would stand her ground against a tiny rodent. Thank goodness I wasn’t famous enough to be a Rush Limbaugh target. “Femi-Nazi hypocritical wimp Madeleine Begun Kane is ascared of a wee little squirrel,” he’d surely say if he knew I existed. … (A Squirrely Lesson is continued here.)

UPDATE: Happy Squirrel Appreciation Day, January 21st!