Archive for the ‘Clumsiness Humor’ Category

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: ICE at the end of any one line

Sunday, November 27th, 2016

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using ICE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SHOPPING, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best SHOPPING-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on December 11, 2016, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 10, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

I’m a klutz who used FIGURE skates twice.
Would I try again? Never! No dice!
I kept fretting I’d fall,
Hit the wall, and then sprawl,
As I skated on very thin ice.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode To The Thumb

Thursday, February 18th, 2016

Thumbs are handy for women and men;
So convenient when we have a yen
To shake hands, hitch a ride,
Grab and lift, move that slide.
I just wish I had fewer than TEN.

Happy Thumb Appreciation Day. (February 18)

A Window Into My Guilt (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 6th, 2015

A Window Into My Guilt (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

You’re sure to encounter frustration
With laptops, when spilling libation:
Your computer won’t thrive,
You may lose your hard drive,
And you’ll likely face defenestration.

Dear Klutzy Gift-Givers (Limerick)

Thursday, December 18th, 2014

Dear Klutzy Gift-Givers (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Are your fingers all thumbs? Then beware!
Please don’t try to convince her you care
By wrapping your gift.
One quick look — she’ll be miffed:
“Why’s my present been mauled by a bear?”

Out on a Limb Haiku Quintet

Monday, February 21st, 2011

Though I’m never safe,
his arms always comfort me,
and that must suffice.

*****

Ballroom dancing class—
learning creative ways to
defeat the rumba.

*****

Morning legs dangle
off the bed, as antique joints
brace for their touch down.

*****

Feeling elated—
great, yet dampened by knowing
what’s soon to follow.

*****

Poised atop mirage
of a career, gazing down
at life left behind.

*****

(I wrote the 1st haiku for We Write Poems’ safe prompt; the 4th haiku for Sensational Haiku Wednesday’s elation prompt; and the 5th haiku for One Single Impression’s top prompt and Haiku Heights’ mirage prompt.)

Diversion Verse

Wednesday, January 5th, 2011

Airplane Piloting 101: If you must spill coffee, spill it on your co-pilot … and not on the plane’s communication’s equipment.

A United Airlines flight from Chicago to Frankfurt, Germany, was diverted to Toronto this week after the pilot dumped a cup of coffee on the plane’s communication’s equipment. The unwanted liquid triggered a series of emergency codes, including one for a hijacking, according to Transport Canada, the agency that regulates transportation in Canada.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Diversion Verse
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A pilot with coffee needs skills
To captain his plane without spills.
So I don’t mean to grouse,
But kindly don’t douse
The controls, cuz that’s flying no-frills.

Slovenly Limerick

Wednesday, October 20th, 2010

Slovenly Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow whose shirt was all stained
Saw his lovely wife’s look — it was pained.
“You’re so messy with pasta,”
She chided him. “Basta!
You’re just like your dad — it’s ingrained.”

UPDATE: Happy National Pasta Day: October 17, 2012!

Feeling Silly … And Sore

Tuesday, February 23rd, 2010

My lifelong klutziness is starting to get on my nerves. Okay, I don’t complain when I fall while trying to swing dance. Not too much, anyway. After all, there’s assumption of risk involved. But just the other day I managed to fall off a folding chair. And that’s plain stupid … not to mention, embarrassing:

Feeling Silly … And Sore (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If I fall while I dance, I don’t care:
It’s a case of swing dancer, beware.
But my clumsiness irks
When I’m one of those jerks
Who foolishly falls off a chair.