It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off.
Congratulations to WILL T. LAUGHLIN, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:
Said Irene to Eileen, “Am I late?”
Said Eileen to Irene, “I’m irate!
I lean in the lane
All alone in the rain –
Oh what wicked wet weather to wait!”
And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Brian Allgar, Tim James, Kirk Miller, Dave Johnson, Pedro Poitevin, Will T. Laughlin, and Phil Graham. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:
They had lent at so monstrous a rate
That it couldn’t be paid by the date,
For the interest fee
Was twice GNP,
So the bankers now own the Greek state.
A guy found a lady first-rate,
So he asked if she’d go on a date.
But she snapped, “You chew gum,
And it makes you look dumb!”
So he’ll stay home and just mast…icate.
Though the woman heard goose was first rate
At the bistro, supposedly great,
The cook carelessly plucked
The main course; it was mucked.
She felt down in the mouth when she ate.
A mistress grew very irate;
Her lover was chronically late.
One night, he would find
Her gift left behind:
A patient, inflatable mate.
Behold my inflatable mate:
Her buttocks are truly first-rate!
I think that I must
Release all my lust
Before I begin to deflate.
Will T. Laughlin:
Donald Trump, at the Heavenly Gate
(Where Saint Peter had asked why he’d rate
An entrance therein),
Said, “If Pride is a sin,
Then it’s God’s fault he made me so great!”
I’m hoping to finally sate
My sex drive before it’s too late.
All the dollars I’ve paid
To those whores to get laid
Have my wife acting very irate.
When we last bared our bodies to mate,
Can’t remember just how it did rate.
But my wife blew her chance
For steamy romance.
If she’d blown something else, I’d be great!
Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.
In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!