Archive for the ‘Movie & Play Humor’ Category

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SCREEN at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: July 13, 2019)

Saturday, June 29th, 2019

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SCREEN at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to WIND INSTUMENTS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best WIND-INSTRUMENT-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on July 14, 2019, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 13, 2019 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my SCREEN-rhyme limerick, which happens to be an acrostic limerick:

She is tiny; at barely five feet,
Her heels swing from a normal-sized seat.
Oh those movies, unseen;
Rangy men block the screen.
Theater’s hopeless; home-viewing is sweet.

And here’s my WIND-INSTRUMENT-themed limerick, which is also an acrostic limerick:

Oh the sound of the oboe is great,
But the reed making makes me irate.
Often reeds that seem fine
End up trashed. (Most of mine!)
So I envy the flute player’s fate.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Married To a Mush-Meister (Limerick)

Monday, December 26th, 2016

Hubby Mark savors films that are sappy,
And what’s crappy to ME makes him happy.
He’ll be glued to the screen
At the mushiest scene,
While I mentally keen, “Make it snappy!”

The Revealing Oscars

Monday, February 23rd, 2015

The Revealing Oscars
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Oscars have aired
With winners declared,
While folks mostly stared
At the skin that was bared.

UPDATE: This Limerick-Off will continue for a second week and run through March 7th. Why? Blame Time Warner’s outage in my neighborhood, from which I’m now recovering. Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: EMOTE or REMOTE or MOAT at the end of Line 1 or 2 or 5

Saturday, February 21st, 2015

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using EMOTE or REMOTE or MOAT at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner early March 8, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your extended submission deadline is Saturday, March 7, at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

An actress who tends to emote
Over nonsense was grabbed by the throat
By an actor one day.
’Twasn’t part of the play,
But his mode of theatrical note.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

My Views On The Interview (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 23rd, 2014

My Views On The Interview (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A film that sounds rather inane
Was nearly sent right down the drain,
And with it free speech.
So I’m glad it will reach
Many viewers — though I shall abstain.

Mad Wanderer (Limerick)

Sunday, July 13th, 2014

Mark wants us to go see a movie tonight. So I’m bracing for my customary hate-the-movie, ADD freak-out, which tends to hit roughly 20 minutes into most movies.

At that point, I jump out of my seat and flee the theater, after whispering to Mark that I’ll be back when the movie’s over.

And that explains this limerick:

Mad Wanderer
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Watching movies at home fits the bill.
I am free then to wander at will
Through our house, as Mark stares
At a film getting glares
From his wife, who just sees it as swill.

Rating The Movies

Thursday, December 26th, 2013

A recent Washington Post Style Invitational contest asked us to “suggest some new movie ratings to warn against various objectionable aspects of films.”

Here are my entries, one of which won me Second prize. Yippee!!! Can you guess which? (The answer will appear “upside down” at the end of this post.)

Rated BYOJ: A comedy so unfunny, you should “Bring Your Own Jokes.”

Rated DDM: “Dreadful Dramatic Music” can’t disguise the lack of a plot.

Rated THU: Too Hard to understand.

Rated WEF: Weird Enough to be Foreign.

Rated PGD: Rated “Please Get Dressed” because it features barely clad actors who don’t exercise enough.

Rated WOR: Way Over-Rated.

Rated DBG: “Don’t Bring your Girlfriend,” if you ever want to see her again.

Rated TVEFQT: Too Violent Even For Quenton Tarantino.

Rated P2BP: Pretending to be Profound.

Rated ZZZ: Impossible not to sleep through.

Rated SHIT: Stay Home. It’s Terrible.

And here (in upside down form) is the entry that won Second Prize:

˙uƃıǝɹoɟ ǝq oʇ ɥƃnouǝ pɹıǝʍ :ɟǝʍ pǝʇɐɹ

You can read all the winning entries here.

Limerick Kick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, July 14th, 2013

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow had threatened to kick…*

or

A woman was trying to kick…*

or

A man gave the ball a hard kick…*

or

A woman had gotten a kick…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Kick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though a fellow had gotten a kick
Out of seeing a circus-themed flick
That featured his son,
The best gymnast, bar none,
Flip reviews made it flop really quick.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Suspenseful Limerick

Tuesday, March 12th, 2013

Suspenseful Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There’s a hitch in today’s celebrations,
But no reason to hold back libations.
Cuz it’s not for the birds
And it’s not just the nerds
Who commemorate Hitchcock’s creations.

Happy National Alfred Hitchcock Day!

Limerick Ode To Miserable Singing

Monday, February 25th, 2013

Many people were offended by Seth MacFarlane’s “Saw Your Boobs” at last night’s Oscars. But, at the risk of damaging my feminist cred, I’m not one of them.

Of course, I do understand the negative reaction. However, the song didn’t bother me because I viewed it as parody, rather than misogyny.

But what did bother me at the Oscars was everybody pretending that the Les Misérables cast can sing.

Limerick Ode To Miserable Singing
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There are folks who appear up in arms:
For the “boob song,” they sound the alarms.
But to me, here’s what riled:
Dreadful singing gone wild
In Les Miz — kindly call les gendarmes.

Nutty Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, October 28th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A man who was rather a nut…*

or

A gal who was rather a nut…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Nutty Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who was rather a nut
Held a broad definition of smut:
With standards unbending,
He’d freak when attending
A film, often shouting out “Cut!”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode To Peter Falk

Friday, June 24th, 2011

Mark and I were very saddened to hear that Peter Falk has died. He’s provided so much entertainment and so many laughs over the years, I had to write this limerick:

Limerick Ode To Peter Falk
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Alas, we have lost Peter Falk.
He was famed for his “one more thing” talk.
His Columbo spurred laughs
With his “just pretend” gaffes,
As he nailed ev’ry bad guy he’d stalk.

A Source Of Annoyance (Limerick Movie Review)

Friday, May 13th, 2011

The year is young. But hubby Mark and I already have a candidate for the year’s worst movie-going experience: Source Code. I found it so annoying and boring, that I walked out after a half-hour or so. Mark didn’t like it much either, but opted to stay, hoping for a boffo ending.

So I spent the next ninety minutes wandering around a shopping center, killing time while Mark watched the movie … or so I thought. As I later learned, the film broke twenty or thirty minutes before the movie’s ending, and they never got it going again. So much for that boffo pay-off!

A Source Of Annoyance
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The last movie we saw, was a snooze.
I left early in lieu of loud boos.
Its title was Source Code
It struck our remorse code —
Left us singing the cash-wasted blues.

(Prompted by movie poetry)

It’s Time To Tanka Beethoven (Tanka)

Sunday, February 27th, 2011

It’s Time To Tanka Beethoven
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The King’s Speech film score
gets Desplat an Oscar nod,
but poor Beethoven
is overlooked once again—
He needs a new publicist.

NOTE: Alexandre Desplat’s Oscar-nominated score for The King’s Speech is dominated by the music of Ludwig van Beethoven, specifically Beethoven’s 7th Symphony and Beethoven’s Piano Concerto No. 5, the Emperor Concerto. For more information on Beethoven’s frequent appearance in film scores, read Why Beethoven Deserves An Oscar.

Fighting Mad

Saturday, February 26th, 2011

Since I already wrote a limerick review of the Fighter, I wasn’t planning to post on that topic again. Even Melissa Leo’s “Consider” her for an Oscar photo campaign wasn’t enough to get me writing. Though for the record, I think she looks great in those pics and I’m rooting for her.

Actually, now that I’m on the subject, here’s a message to Leo critics who fault her for showing herself in a more physically attractive light: You’re being sexist. Freedom of choice is a feminist ideal. So if Melissa Leo chooses to look glamorous and sexy for a change, that’s just fine with me. More power to her!

But back to what prompted this post. Carry On Tuesday’s saved by the bell prompt got me thinking about boxers, which reminded me of the Fighter and inspired this limerick:

Saved By The Bell
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The boxer was saved by the bell
After being in boxing match hell.
He needed a break.
That’s all it would take:
That sound ere he once again fell.

(Also for I Saw Sunday.)

UPDATE: Congratulations Melissa Leo on your Oscar! I knew you could f…ing do it.

The Fighter, A Limerick Review

Saturday, January 22nd, 2011

I fought seeing The Fighter for reasons I explain in my limerick review. But I’m glad I succumbed:

The Fighter, A Limerick Review
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I tend to hate films about fighting.
Cuz I cringe at the punching and smiting.
But The Fighter is more
About fam’ly than gore.
So see it. I promise — no biting.

(The Fighter stars Mark Wahlberg, Christian Bale, Amy Adams, and Melissa Leo.)

The Social Network (Limerick Review)

Monday, October 4th, 2010

Movie audiences sure seem to love Aaron Sorkin’s The Social Network, even if Facebook’s main founder Mark Zuckerberg doesn’t.

Hubby Mark and I saw it Saturday night and we certainly enjoyed it. And that brings me to my limerick review of this delightful film about Facebook’s founding and the lawsuits it inspired:

The Social Network (Limerick Review)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Social Network’s a wonderful flick —
Snappy dialogue — listen, it’s quick.
Depositions are used
Rather well — I’m amused.
As for Oscars this year, it’s my pick.

Tornado Night

Saturday, September 18th, 2010

Thursday night’s weather was certainly interesting here in Queens, New York. Hubby Mark and I were on the Long Island Railroad on route to an Off-Broadway play, when what turned out to be a tornado hit.

After some delays, our train did manage to make it to Penn Station, after which the railroad completely shut down, stranding hordes of rush hour commuters. (As we later learned, the tracks were littered with uprooted trees, and the storm had wreaked havoc throughout much of New York City.)

But we went off to see the play, figuring that by the time we were finished with theater and dinner, everything would be back to normal. Ha!

As it turned out, more than 24 hours would elapse before the LIRR would fully recover. So our path home to Bayside, Queens was a challenge, involving an unfamiliar combo of train, subway, and bus.

Relieved to finally be home, we were greeted by an unwelcome discovery — the tallest tree in our backyard had relocated to our neighbor’s yard.

Well, at least the play wasn’t bad — It Must Be Him, starring Peter Scolari and Liz Torres. Not great mind you — not even close. But everything’s relative.

Weepy Limerick

Wednesday, September 15th, 2010

Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman who readily cried…

Here’s mine. (It’s a three-verse limerick, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)

Weepy Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman who readily cried
Never learned to take movies in stride.
She would feel oh so low
And her tear drops would flow
When a character sickened or died.

She’d weep for the good guys and bad—
Did not matter — they both made her sad.
How her husband freaked out
When she sobbed for a lout
Like a killer or mean, deadbeat dad.

He told her, “You’re acting insane.
Is there something amiss with your brain?
Please don’t cry for a villain
Who merits his killin’.
Put clamps on your waterworks main.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

(If you’d like to receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting Limerick-Off first line alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, right above my photo. Thanks!)

Get Thee To Troilus And Cressida

Sunday, July 4th, 2010

If you enjoy Shakespeare performed beautifully in a magnificent setting, don’t miss the Hudson Valley Shakespeare Festival at the Boscobel Restoration in Garrison, New York.

Troilus and Cressida opened July 3rd, and it was terrific.

We started the evening with a delightful picnic on Boscobel’s Hudson River grounds, then moved into the tent for an inventive performance of the baudy, Trojan tale.

Things got even more unusual in the Second Act, which began with a quirky, yet oddly fitting musical number. After the music, the audience members were welcomed to leave their seats temporarily, walk down to the Hudson River, and view the holiday fireworks display that was about to take place across the river at West Point.

Once the fireworks were over, we returned to our seats and the play continued. What fun!

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Like Shakespeare performed in a tent?
Then see Troilus — it’s time quite well spent:
At the Boscobel joint—
Straight across from West Point.
Please don’t miss it — you’ll surely repent.