Posts Tagged ‘Marriage Verse’

Married To a Mush-Meister (Limerick)

Monday, December 26th, 2016

Hubby Mark savors films that are sappy,
And what’s crappy to ME makes him happy.
He’ll be glued to the screen
At the mushiest scene,
While I mentally keen, “Make it snappy!”

Happy “Bike To Work Day”

Thursday, May 15th, 2014

May 16th is National Bike to Work Day. Of course, some rides work out better than others:

A Spousal Ride (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Spousal nagging pushed hubby to strike
Some balance by riding a bike.
But when ego and ass
Took a beating, alas,
He told biking and wife, “Take a hike!”

Post-Valentine’s Day Ode

Saturday, February 15th, 2014

Post-Valentine’s Day Ode
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Shoveling snow–
Not my favorite chore.
Mark did it for me.
That’s what marriage is for.

Limerick Scene (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, February 2nd, 2014

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow was making a scene…*

or

A fellow who liked being seen…*

or

A woman was making the scene…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Scene
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow was making a scene,
Shouting phrases obscene and quite mean,
At a wedding, alas—
His own! Horse’s ass!
That groom’s surely losing his sheen.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Fix (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, September 15th, 2013

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow got into a fix…*

or

A fellow was trying to fix…*

or

A woman who needed a fix…*

or

A man who demands a quick fix…*

(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Limerick Fix
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow got into a fix
After betting on rather poor picks.
Not casinos or horses—
I’m talking divorces;
He married four henpecking chicks.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Rant

Wednesday, August 28th, 2013

Limerick Rant
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A botanist, rather a ranter,
Looked down upon lighthearted banter.
Though he constantly “shared”
His views, which he blared,
When his wife tried to talk, he’d supplant ‘er.

Hall Of Limericks (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, January 27th, 2013

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A fellow stepped into the hall…*

or

A woman stepped into the hall…*

or

A fellow was trying to haul…*

or

A woman was trying to haul…*

*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)

Here’s my limerick:

Hall of Limericks
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman stepped into the hall
And bawled, “This is terribly small!”
She’d been hoping to wed
In a “palace” instead.
But her budget kept hitting a wall.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Well-Endowed Limerick

Wednesday, October 31st, 2012

Well-Endowed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man got a look at the titty
Of the well-endowed, lovely Miss Kitty
And imagined his life
With that gal as his wife
In his harem at Casa de Mitty.

(With apologies to James Thurber)

Yet Another Limerick Ode To My Husband Mark Kane

Tuesday, May 8th, 2012

Yet Another Limerick Ode To My Husband Mark Kane
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Oh, what have I done to my Mark:
Taught him limerick writing, and hark!
Now he’ll draft something new,
Then lug laptop to loo —
I can’t hide from his poetry arc.

(Note from Mad Kane: I’m really not making this up. On Sunday, Mark followed me into the bathroom, carrying his laptop. That’s how eager he was to show me his latest limerick.)

Sundry Haiku and Tanka

Wednesday, August 31st, 2011

Prompted to write a school-related haiku, I ended up with a tanka. I just couldn’t seem to fit this true tale into a mere seventeen syllables:

Classroom clock won’t move,
its hands dulled by droning prof,
who catches my stare
and yells, “If you’re bored, then go.”
Lesson learned — I take my leave.

*****

Continuing with an education theme, I’ve used Three Word Wednesday’s drag, mumble, penetrate prompt in this haiku:

Penetrating mind
who mumbles at his lectern —
a scholarly drag.

*****

Drop the “f” from “flaws”
and you’re left with the word “laws,”
most of which are flawed.

*****

What greater pleasure
than a standing ovation
from the man you love.

*****

Undecorated (Haiku and Tanka)

Tuesday, April 5th, 2011

Blank slate office walls —
Decorate? No one tempted —
temporary work.

*****

Nakedly ringless,
undecorated fingers
robbed of wedding bling.
Married still, but ringed no more.
Replaceable … and yet not.

*****

(Prompted by decorated)

Limerick In Free-Fall

Tuesday, March 8th, 2011

I rarely write poems about science. But Big Tent Poetry got my juices flowing with this article about astronauts, NASA, and clutter at the International Space Station: Here’s the line that got me going:

There is no up or down in space, so clutter adorns almost every surface and is held in place by duct tape, Velcro and metal clips.

Limerick In Free-Fall
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Space Station clutter’s appalling.
Objects long to engage in free-falling.
It take Velcro, clips, tape
To prevent their escape:
My hubby’s fav tools — missed his calling.

(More space verse here.)

My Chances Of Watching TV Are Remote

Wednesday, February 2nd, 2011

This week Big Tent Poetry provides a bunch of word prompts, urging us to use one or more in our poems. I used three of them in my haiku (remote, function, handle) and one in a limerick (remote.)

First, my limerick:

I’m tempted to hide the remote
From my spouse in a closet or coat,
Cuz he flicks ev’ry station
In rapid rotation.
Missing show after show gets my goat.

*****
And now my haiku:

Dysfunctional spouse
Wields remote ADD-style.
Wife can’t handle it.

Trippy Limerick

Tuesday, November 30th, 2010

Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman was planning a trip…

Here’s mine. (It’s a two-verse limerick, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)

A woman was planning a trip,
When her husband said, “Please, get a grip.
Our bank account’s low.
We have one-way cash flow.”
But his wife said, “Enough with your lip!”

“You’ve been wasting our cash at the track
And on poker and possibly crack.
I’m sick of this life
And of being your wife.
So goodbye, it is you who should pack.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, right above my photo. Thanks!

Frazzled Limerick Limerick Audio

Sunday, October 31st, 2010

Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A frazzled new father named Jim…

Here’s mine:

Frazzled Limerick (Frazzled Limerick Audio)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A frazzled new father named Jim
Bought his baby toy trains on a whim.
When his wife saw the gift,
She was terribly miffed,
So she yelled, “That’s for you. What’s for him?”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, right above my photo. Thanks!

Update: May 2 is Baby Day.

Miserly Limerick

Monday, April 19th, 2010

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A miserly fellow name Joe…

Here’s the limerick I wrote with that line. (It’s a two-verser, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)

Miserly Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A miserly fellow name Joe
Was obsessed with his weekly cash flow.
The guy was so petty,
He ordered wife Betty
To flush once a day. She said, “No!”

Then he yelled, “You are wasteful and low!”
But she said, “It’s distasteful. No go!”
So he sued for divorce—
An asinine course.
Now the lawyers have all of his dough.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.

My Confession

Wednesday, July 9th, 2008

My Confession (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m married, but still like to date.
It’s good for my marriage — no, great!
Now don’t be perturbed
Or concerned or disturbed.
The fellow I date is my mate.

(You can find more of my marriage humor and verse here.)

UPDATE: I’ve just learned that May is Date Your Mate Month. Of course my husband Mark and I like to celebrate it all year round. :)

Ode To An Absent-Minded Husband

Monday, May 5th, 2008

Ode To An Absent-Minded Husband
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Your umbrella can not have gone far.
Can’t believe how forgetful you are!
If we still had each cent
On umbrellas you’ve spent,
We’d have cash to put gas in our car.

Note: My otherwise wonderful husband has lost so many umbrellas over the years, our umbrella fund could actually gas up at least a dozen cars … even at today’s prices.

Thanks to Simply Snickers for the “umbrella” prompt, Weekend Wordsmith for the “torrential rain” prompt, and Sunday Scribblings for its “family” prompt.

UPDATE: I’ve just learned that National Umbrella Day is celebrated yearly on February 10th.