Posts Tagged ‘Law Humor’
Saturday, September 12th, 2020
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SEAT or DECEIT or RECEIPT or CONCEIT at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to ADVICE, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best ADVICE-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on Sept. 27, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, Sept. 26, 2020 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SEAT/DECEIT/RECEIPT/CONCEIT-rhyme limerick:
“My husband in court must be beat.
Cuz I’m sickened by all his deceit.
He lies just for sport
And in bed he falls short…
So he needs to go down in defeat.”
And here’s my ADVICE-themed limerick:
“Loosen up. Time to let down your hair.”
“Take a risk, but don’t act on a dare.”
“Grow a pair. Roll the dice.”
Uninvited advice
Makes me wig out and bristle. Beware!
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Advice, Competition Limerick, Court Humor, Deceit, Divorce Limerick, Law Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Lying, Marriage Verse, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Family & Relatives Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 147 Comments »
Wednesday, April 1st, 2020
The pandemic is causing a strain
On emotional health. What a bane!
We feel trapped! Tempers flare!
Can’t escape! I need air!
(Hey divorce lawyers, look for a gain.)
Tags: Coronavirus, Covid-19, Divorce Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Law Humor, Lawyer Humor, Mental Health Humor, Pandemic
Posted in Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Mental Health Humor | 1 Comment »
Saturday, January 9th, 2016
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick using PALE or PAIL or IMPALE at the end of Line 1 or Line 2 or Line 5. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write a themed limerick related to DOGS and/or CATS, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best dog and/or cat-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on January 24th, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 23, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my limerick:
A maritime lawyer from Yale
Feels his int’rest in law start to pale.
He’s filled with regret,
For he’s drowning in debt–
So at sea in his field, he can’t bail.
Please feel free to write your own limerick(s) using the same rhyme word and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Debt Humor, Law Humor, Lawyers, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Maritime Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 137 Comments »
Saturday, June 27th, 2015
Limerick Ode To Gay Marriage
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Ev’ry marriage has good and has bad.
It brings joy, but can drive you quite mad.
I’m so glad gays are free
Via legal decree
To wed — Just don’t marry in plaid.
Tags: Gay Marriage, Gay Rights, Law Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Legal Limerick, Marriage Humor, Supreme Court
Posted in Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Gay Marriage
Wednesday, June 17th, 2015
A Bugged Plaintiff (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Madame Blanche filed a claim with the court,
A complaint for intentional tort:
“As plainly depicted
Distress was inflicted–
My old spouse should by now be quite mort.”
Tags: Crime & Punishment Humor, Law Humor, Litigation Humor, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, Tort Verse
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Crime & Punishment Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | Comments Off on A Bugged Plaintiff (Limerick)
Sunday, May 3rd, 2015
Redundant Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I avow and aver and declare
And affirm and attest and I swear:
The redundancy flaw
From practicing law
Ain’t impairing my lim’ricks. So there!
Tags: Law Humor, Lawyer Humor, Lawyer Limerick, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Legal Jargon, Legal Limerick, Redundancy Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 13 Comments »
Wednesday, October 8th, 2014
Limerick Ode To “Lovable Lawyers Day”
By Madeleine Begun Kane
It’s “Lovable Lawyers Day.” Whee!
But this day isn’t greeted with glee.
It seems most people say:
“Love a Lawyer? No Way!”
But what about ex-Esqs … like me?
*****
Alternative Version for “Love Your Lawyer Day” (1st Friday in November)
“Love Your Lawyer Day” most will agree
Isn’t greeted with gusto or glee.
Many clients would say:
“Love my lawyer? No way!”
But what about ex-Esqs … like me?
Tags: Law Humor, Lawyers, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Legal Limerick, Lovable Lawyers Day, Love Your Lawyer Day, November Holidays, October Holidays, Odd Holidays
Posted in Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To “Lovable Lawyers Day” (October 8)
Monday, July 14th, 2014
Limerick Ode To “Nude Day”
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A gal likes to publicly doff
All her clothing, then pose to show off.
“It’s a strip search time-saver
I did you a favor,”
When jailed, she’ll transparently scoff.
Tags: Bawdy Humor, Clothing Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, International Nude Day, July Holidays, Law Humor, Legal Limerick, Naked Limerick, National Nude Day, Nude Day, Nude Humor, Odd Holidays, World Nude Day
Posted in Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Clothing Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Fashion Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Leisure Time Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Happy “Nude Day!” (July 14)
Friday, June 27th, 2014
Okay, this isn’t a major holiday, but still…
Happy Birthday To “Happy Birthday” (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“Happy Birthday To You” has a birthday.
Yes, today is its notable mirth day.
But “Good Morning To All”
Was its lyric. Don’t bawl!
I’ll concede it’s less key than, say, “Earth Day.”
The song “Happy Birthday To You” has a strange and complicated history. Its melody was first published on June 27, 1893 as “Good Morning to All,” with lyrics that have nothing to do with birthdays. And its copyright ownership has been the subject of numerous lawsuits. Despite its advanced age, it somehow remains under copyright protection.
Tags: Birthdays, Copyright, Good Morning To You, Happy Birthday Song, June Holidays, Law Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Music Humor & Verse, Odd Holidays, Song Lyrics
Posted in Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Music Humor & Verse, Music Poems, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Happy Birthday To “Happy Birthday” (Limerick)
Friday, June 6th, 2014
A Rhyme To The Wise (2-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A scrappy young felon liked rhyme,
So he promised himself — no more crime.
He’d instead be a rapper.
But here is the capper:
His “confessional tunes” got him time.
So limerick writers, take heed.
Your rhymes may be next. They could feed
A detective’s suspicions,
Who deems them admissions.
Then indictment — your verse his first lead.
Note: Legal experts are currently debating the surprisingly widespread use of rap lyrics in criminal cases.
Tags: Crime & Punishment Humor, Law Humor, Writing & Publishing Humor
Posted in Crime & Punishment Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Writing & Publishing Humor | 2 Comments »
Thursday, May 1st, 2014
May 1st is Law Day, which means I’m legally required to write a limerick:
Limerick Ode To Law Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A day meant to celebrate law
Sounds just lovely, except for this flaw:
Fair play takes some doing;
It’s tough as pursuing
A needle in large stacks of straw.
Tags: Fair Play, Judiciary Humor, Law Day, Law Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, May Holidays, Odd Holidays
Posted in Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Happy “Law Day” (Limerick)
Wednesday, September 18th, 2013
This three-verse limerick is based on a real Texas criminal case: “Lawyer admits napping at trial, but rates his performance an 8 or a 9.”
A Criminal Defense? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A man got a sentence immense,
Then complained of a sleepy defense:
“My defense lawyer slept
Which makes him inept,
So a do-over trial makes sense.”
His lawyer contested the claim:
“I am not for that sentence to blame.
I slept just a while
And I ran a good trial.
Even dozing, I’m right on my game.”
On this statement the lawyer won’t budge,
And he even is running for judge.
I suppose that he thinks
When he’s caught forty winks,
His court clerk will just give him a nudge.
Tags: Attorney Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Criminals, Daniel Textor Jr., Law Humor, Lawyers, Martin Zimmerman, Sleeping On The Job, Trial Humor
Posted in Crime & Punishment Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Sleep & Insomnia Humor | 12 Comments »
Thursday, August 1st, 2013
As you can tell from this 3-verse limerick, my legal career had a rather inauspicious start:
A Lawyer’s Tale (3-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I once worked for a sleazy attorney.
(Let’s just call him “Unethical Earnie.”)
I rebuffed him when ordered
To do things that bordered
On iffy and worse. What a journey!
I quit just as soon as I could —
Found a new lawyer job — knock on wood.
He flipped out when I left
And he left me bereft,
Ripping off all my cash really good.
Decades later, I just got the news
That this fellow who’s garnered my boos
Lost his license: Disbarred!
No more lawyering card!
Schadenfreude — I virtually ooze.
Tags: Bosses, Career Humor, Employment Humor, Law Humor, Lawyers, Legal Limerick
Posted in Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Workplace & Career Humor | 16 Comments »
Sunday, June 23rd, 2013
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was trying to find…*
or
A woman was thrilled with her find…*
or
A man was irate — he’d been fined…*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Finding Limericks
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A woman who found she’d been fined
Worked hard at escaping her bind.
She got tied up in knots
Cuz the court system rots:
It seems justice and law ain’t entwined.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Fines, Justice Humor, Law Humor, Legal System, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Writing Prompts
Posted in Contests, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Books | 98 Comments »
Sunday, June 2nd, 2013
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was hit by a suit…*
or
A woman was filing a suit…*
or
A fellow was wearing a suit…*
or
A gal rented space built to suit…*
*(Please note that minor variations to my first lines are acceptable. However, rhyme words may not be altered, except by using homonyms or homophones.)
Here’s my limerick:
Limerick Suit
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A fellow was hit by a suit
From his neighbor, and this one’s a beaut.
The core of the case:
“His trees have no grace.”
So the suit failed to bear any fruit.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Law Humor, Lawyers, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Litigation Poem, Neighbors Humor, Outdoors Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Trees, Writing Prompts
Posted in Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Neighbors Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 87 Comments »
Saturday, April 27th, 2013
No Accounting For Taste (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The prison was chock full of crooks,
Like the chef — in for cooking the books.
He’d been caught by the owner,
Who shouted this groaner:
“Fishy numbers! These aren’t chinooks!”
Note from Mad Kane: I learned two things today:
1: Chinook salmon, a.k.a. king salmon, are the “most highly prized salmon in the culinary world.”
2: A “salmon day” is slang for “spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get screwed somehow in the end.”
Tags: Accounting Humor, Bookkeeping Humor, Chef Humor, Chinooks, Cooking Humor, Crime & Punishment Humor, Criminal Poetry, Culinary Humor, Fish Humor, Law Humor, Salmon Day, Salmon Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Crime & Punishment Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor | 8 Comments »
Sunday, December 23rd, 2012
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:
A fellow was sipping some port…*
or
A woman was sipping some port…*
*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)
Here’s my limerick:
Limerick Port
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A tall lawyer was sipping some port,
While doing some prep work for court.
He drank more than he should have.
Too bad, cuz he could have
Prevailed, but instead came up short.
Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Competition Limerick, Drinking Limerick, Law Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Legal Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Liquor Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Port, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Food & Drink Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 95 Comments »
Tuesday, July 10th, 2012
Taking your baby son with you when visiting a hooker is probably unwise:
A man in Tuscaloosa may be charged with child endangerment after taking along his nine month old son during a meeting with a prostitute.
Once inside the motel room, another man entered and a fight broke out. Shots were fired while the baby was in the room, and a bullet grazed the father’s head.
Gunning For Father Of The Year?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear dads, if your kid’s under one,
And you’re looking for prostitute fun,
A sitter’s a must;
Else forget about lust,
Or be labeled a son of a gun.
Tags: Babies Humor, Bawdy Humor, Children Limerick, Crime, Dads Limerick, Family & Relatives Humor, Law Humor, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Parenting Humor, Prostitutes Humor, Sex Humor
Posted in Advice Humor & Poems, Bawdy Limericks, Behavior & Personality, Crime & Punishment Humor, Family & Relatives Humor, Family Verse, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks, Mothers & Fathers Humor, Relationship Humor, Social Satire | 3 Comments »
