A lawyer whose molar was aching
Lambasted a bakery’s baking:
Said his tooth had been marred
By a dangerous shard—
A shakedown, methinks, in the making.
(National Toothache Day falls on February 9.)
Posts Tagged ‘Tooth Humor’
A Cooked Up Complaint? (Limerick)
Thursday, February 9th, 2023Dodging The Dentist (2-Verse Limerick)
Monday, May 30th, 2022Who hasn’t discovered a gap
Where you once had a crown or a cap?
Then you search high and low.
Where the hell did it go?
If you’re lucky, it fell in your lap.
But more likely, it’s gone or destroyed;
Need a new one to fill that damn void.
You’re apparently fucked;
That doc you have ducked
For years must, alas, be employed.
Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: Cruise or Crews or Cruse at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: November 27, 2021)
Sunday, November 14th, 2021It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using Cruise or Crews or Cruse at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to Retirement, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best Retirement-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on November 28, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, November 27, 2021, at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my CRUISE or CREWS or CRUSE-rhyme limerick:
My muse often gives me the blues.
When I ask her for help, she’ll refuse.
She’ll mock me and roast me
And frequently ghost me.
She’s AWOL right now — on a cruise.
And here’s my RETIREMENT-themed limerick:
“It is best to acknowledge the truth
And retire; you’re way past your youth,”
Said a gal to her spouse,
Who’s a dentist. “Don’t grouse!
Just face facts: You are long in the tooth.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
My Raw Aversion (Limerick)
Wednesday, June 18th, 2014Are you celebrating Sushi Day today? Not me!
My Raw Aversion (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The thought of raw fish makes me ill,
And though many love sushi, a drill
That’s invading my tooth
Is more welcome, in truth,
Than such super-rare swill on the bill.
An Invention With Bite (Limerick)
Tuesday, May 28th, 2013Do we really need this invention?
Coffee lovers may be able to get a shot of caffeine right from the toothbrush, if a patent from Colgate-Palmolive goes through.
No need for the double latte down the street: That caffeine could be administered through a patch while you’re polishing those pearlies.
According to the patent application, “The present invention pertains to an oral care implement generally, and more particularly to a toothbrush that releases a chemical into the mouth during use.”
An Invention With Bite (2-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Can’t wait for your morning caffeine?
Need a fix before brewing that bean?
Too rushed for that rush?
Well a fancy new brush
Could replace that caffeine-filled canteen.
I refer to a new application
For a patent. If granted, your ration
Of morning caffeine
Could arrive as you clean
All your teeth with your toothbrush. Ovation!
