Posts Tagged ‘Health Limerick’

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: FLU, FLEW, or FLUE at the end of any one line

Saturday, December 10th, 2016

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using FLU, FLEW, or FLUE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PARTIES, using any rhyme scheme. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PARTY-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on December 25, 2016, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 24, 2016 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here are my two sample limericks:

I never get shots for the flu.
It’s just something I don’t like to do;
I’m convinced they won’t work,
And I’ll feel like a jerk
When succumbing to germs from the queue.

and

I’m hoping you won’t misconstrue
This as telling you what you should do:
Our abode smells of smoke,
Which isn’t a joke.
Did you choke off our fireplace flue?

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

What Have They Done To My Treats? (2-Verse Limerick)

Sunday, November 1st, 2015

Halloween week I sampled some candy,
But stuff that I used to find dandy
Made me cringe with distaste.
Has aging laid waste
To my taste buds? I’d rather drink brandy.

Have the folks who make chocolate treats
Altered recipes, cheapened these sweets
Till they taste like debris?
Is it them? Is it me?
Either way, here come healthier eats.

Beer Is Good For You??? (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 26th, 2015

Take this with several grains … of alcohol: According to a bunch of studies, beer is good for you.

Beer Is Good For You??? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

For those who enjoy drinking beer,
There’s news you’ll be happy to hear:
Beer is good for your heart
And your kidneys. Good start…
But I still give its taste a bronx cheer.

Posterior Advances (Limerick)

Monday, November 24th, 2014

Posterior Advances (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Most hospital gowns can cause tears
Cuz our butt spheres so rarely get cheers.
But the med field’s revealed
Asses CAN be concealed;
New frontiers in design shield our rears.

Limerick Ode To The Posture Police

Wednesday, August 14th, 2013

It seems fitting, somehow, that I read about the LumoBack Sensor on International Nagging Day. It “straps around your lower waist to track your posture and vibrates whenever you slouch.”

Limerick Ode To The Posture Police
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The LumoBack Sensor’s a grouch—
It nags and berates when I slouch:
By dispensing bad vibes,
It poor-posture proscribes.
Shouldn’t slouching be cool on a couch?

*****
Note from Mad Kane: I’ve never actually tried this gadget. For all I know, having your “lower waist” (as opposed to your upper waist?) vibrate is a delightful experience.

Jerky Review (Limerick)

Thursday, February 7th, 2013

Does Consumer Reports really need to rate beef jerky and meat sticks?

Jerky Review (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Consumer Reports, what a waste:
Judging jerky and meat sticks for taste.
They’re all loaded with salt
And deserve a “Gevalt!”
Will you next rate the flavor of paste?

UPDATE: June 12 is National Jerky Day.

Musical Exile (Limerick)

Saturday, June 16th, 2012

I usually avoid this topic, but dVerse prompted me to write this far-from-funny limerick:

Musical Exile
By Madeleine Begun Kane

How I long to be back in that chair,
Playing symphony music — longhair.
But my oboe career
Was pilfered, I fear—
Tearful exile by injuries’ snare.

Nude Yoga? Yikes! (Limerick)

Thursday, March 29th, 2012

Yoga’s been in the news quite a bit lately. Is it good for you? Is it bad for you? Should you purchase some fancy yoga garb and skip the actual yoga?

But the oddest story so far is this one about naked yoga classes in South Park Slope, Brooklyn, New York.

Nude Yoga? Yikes!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Take a yoga class naked? How scary!
I confess that the thought makes me wary.
Yes I’ll gladly condone
Nude yoga alone.
But in public? I’m sorry. Too hairy.

(If you’re in Brooklyn and want to study yoga in a more modest fashion, check out my niece’s Crown Heights Fitness.)

Related Posts: A Fountain Of Face-Yoga Youth? and Yoga For What?

Nonplussed By GooglePlus?

Wednesday, July 20th, 2011

Nonplussed by Google-Plus?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Is Google-Plus blessing or curse?
It’s surely inspired some verse.
But here’s what I fear:
With the Plus option here,
My A.D.D.’s getting much worse.

Healthy Limerick

Monday, February 14th, 2011

Once again, it’s Limerick-Off time. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

So I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman was on a campaign…

Here’s mine:

Healthy Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman was on a campaign
Which was driving her fam’ly insane.
Yes, her new “smart health” diet
Kept causing a riot:
Each dinner she served featured brain.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!

A Limerick Ode To Autumn

Monday, September 20th, 2010

Rumor has it that fall will arrive on September 23rd. So I thought I’d celebrate with my Limerick Ode To Autumn:

Limerick Ode To Autumn
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Feels like autumn — the walking is easy
Cuz it’s cool and it’s dry and it’s breezy.
But what do I spy?
Flying pollen — oh my!
Any minute I’ll surely be sneezy.

Keeping Abreast of Breast Gazing

Sunday, August 8th, 2010

One of my Facebook pals recently linked a Med-Guru article touting a breast-gazing study. Its conclusion? Staring at breasts is good for your health and increases your life expectancy. Just one problem — the study’s apparently a hoax or urban myth.

Of course, men can still try to use the “study” when caught ogling. My limerick should help:

Keeping Abreast of Breast Gazing
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There’s a study that strongly suggests
You’ll live longer from staring at breasts.
So guys, if your gal
Sees you leer that locale,
Just explain it’s your life span’s behest.

Whimsical Limerick

Tuesday, June 22nd, 2010

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A woman succumbed to a whim…

Here’s mine:

Whimsical Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A woman succumbed to a whim
And enrolled in an overpriced gym.
She tried free weights, machines,
Even yoga for teens,
Till she ran out of money and vim.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.

Don’t Put These On Your Headstone (Limericks)

Monday, April 5th, 2010

My versifying friend Gerald Bosacker has been writing a series of Poetic Headstones — safety hints in limerick form, which he refers to as “limerbituaries.” When he challenged me to write one, I just had to give it a try:

If your doc says, “Go under the knife.
Only surgery’s saving your life.”
Kindly check out his rep.
Mel did not, the poor schlepp.
So Mel is now missed by his wife.

From there, I moved on to something a bit more warped — not exactly a safety hint, but a “limerbituary,” nonetheless:

Just why is this poor fellow dead?
Well mainly he’s missing his head.
He dined with a bad man,
A head-chopping madman,
And that’s the last time he was fed.

Thanks for the inspiration, Gerald.

Why So Quiet? A Limerick-Explanation

Wednesday, June 4th, 2008

This space has been quiet of late.
But it’s not that my readers don’t rate.
I’ve broken my wrist,
And my brain’s in a twist
From pain killers. Writing must wait.

Healthy Verse (Limerick & Haiku Prompt)

Friday, April 18th, 2008

Today’s limerick and haiku theme is health. First, my limerick:

Maladjusted Men
By Madeleine Begun Kane 

Maladjusted men sometimes say, “Doc, 
Chiropractic is naught but a crock. 
Your adjustments don’t work, 
You’re a sick, spineless jerk, 
And I’ll sue till you’re broke and in hock!”

And now my handy haiku:

My musical hands,
Stricken by carpal tunnel,
Betrayed by my wrists.

Now, of course, it’s your turn. Your assignment, should you choose to accept it, is to write a limerick or haiku (or both) about health. When you’ve posted your verse, please return here and add a direct link to your themed poetry, using Mr. Linky. There’s no rush, by the way, because you have a whole week to post it.

Limerick and Haiku Prompts Participants

1. Crafty Green Poet
2. Tumblewords
3. Nickers and Ink – Limerick 4. Iself

UPDATE: Mr. Linky is now closed, but you can still add links to your health-themed verse in the Comments. And if you’d like to participate in a new poetry prompt, you can always find my latest one here.