Posts Tagged ‘Alcohol Humor’
Saturday, March 9th, 2024
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SHOT or SHOTS at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PICTURES, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PICTURE-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
AMUSING, DOCTOR, NEUROTIC, POSTPONE, VANITY.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on April 7, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, April 6, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SHOT or SHOTS-Rhyme Limerick:
“That damn bartender’s AWOL,” said Scott
To his prep cook. “Let’s see what you’ve got.”
“Though I’ve never mixed drinks,
I can do it, methinks,
So I gladly will give it a shot.”
And here’s my Picture-Themed Limerick:
“Gotta rush to the bookshop. I’m late!
I am meeting another blind date.
And that chick better look
Like her pic, or I’ll book
It, cuz boy, am I sick of pic-bait!”
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
An old woman who loved to complain,
Was neurotic and stubborn and vain.
When her doctor prescribed
Her a cane, the gal gibed:
“That will ruin my look. Where’s your brain?”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Bartender Humor, Bartender Limerick, Battle of the Sexes, Beverage Humor, Blind Date Humor, Competition Limerick, Dating Humor, Dating Limerick, Deception Humor, Doctor Humor, Doctor Limerick, Health Humor, Health Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Vanity Humor, Vanity Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Dating Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Health & Medical Humor, Health Verse, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Physical Appearance, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Restaurant Reviews & Humor | 122 Comments »
Tuesday, January 16th, 2024
“Work’s a slog,” grumbled Bob on his blog.
“I’m bogged down in my backlog; a cog
On a wheel that won’t stop.
I must go till I drop,
Though there’s time for a… Who stole my grog?!?”
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Beverage Humor, Career Humor, Career Limerick, Career Poem, Drinking Limerick, Workplace & Career Humor, Workplace Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Workplace & Career Humor | Comments Off on The Grumbly Staffer (Limerick)
Thursday, December 14th, 2023
It’s “Screwdriver Day.” Yay! Hooray!
Which type should be cheered? Well, they say
It’s the drink; not the tool.
(The reverse would be cruel.)
I intend to start early. Good day!
(National Screwdriver Day is celebrated on December 14th.)
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, Alcohol Verse, December Holidays, Drink Humor, Drink Limerick, Drinks Humor, Odd Holidays, Orange Juice, Screwdriver Day, Screwdrivers, Tools Humor, Vodka, Vodka Humor, Vodka Limerick
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Screw It? (Limerick)
Monday, June 26th, 2023
A fellow who’s known as a lush
Was downing his drinks in a rush.
“If I’m late,” he proclaimed,
“She who shall not be named
Says from now on she’ll ‘only serve mush!'”
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Battle of the Sexes, Drinking Humor, Drinking Limerick, Food Humor, Lateness Humor, Marriage Humor
Posted in Battle of the Sexes, Behavior & Personality, Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor | Comments Off on Lush Limerick
Saturday, June 24th, 2023
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using DRINK or DRINKS at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TASTE, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TASTE-related limerick.
And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.
Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest: ACE, AFRAID, FUNCTION, JADED, UPSET.
(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on July 23, 2023 , right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, July 22, 2023 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my DRINK/DRINKS-Rhyme Limerick:
A nurse who appears on the brink
Of a breakdown stopped seeing her shrink.
“He’s been making me worse,”
She asserts with a curse.
“Plus he claims that I drove him to drink.”
And here’s my TASTE-Themed Limerick:
A gal with a poor sense of style
Hadn’t bought any clothes in a while.
So she purchased a dress,
A bright red, tasteless mess,
Way too ugly and gross to defile.
And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:
I’m afraid that I’m being replaced
Based on nothing important; I’ve aced
All my functions and more,
Yet they’ve shown me the door.
Their grievance? They claim I eat paste.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Competition Limerick, Drinking Limerick, Fashion Humor, Job Humor, Job Loss Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Mental Health Humor, Nurse Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Shrinks, Taste Humor, Workplace Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Fashion Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Mental Health Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest, Workplace & Career Humor | 131 Comments »
Thursday, June 2nd, 2022
When I heard that a neighborhood bum
Had been nicknamed “Free Spirit” by some
Of his pals, I asked “Why
Give that tag to the guy?”
Their response? “He enjoys stealing rum.”
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, Beverage Humor, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Nickname Humor, Nickname Limerick, Rum Humor, Rum Limerick, Theft Humor, Theft Limerick
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Crime & Punishment Humor, Food & Drink Humor, Idiom Humor, Legal & Lawyer Humor, Limericks | Comments Off on An Apt Tag (Limerick)
Tuesday, February 22nd, 2022
Margarita’s a fave in our house.
If I drink one in bars, though, I’ll grouse;
They are weak and too sweet
And consistently beat
By the great ones prepared by my spouse.
(Happy National Margarita Day, which falls each year on February 22.)
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, Alcohol Verse, Bar Humor, Drink Verse, Drinking Limerick, February Holidays, Holiday Humor, Liquor Humor, Margaritas, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays, Tequila, Triple Sec
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Happy Margarita Day (Limerick)
Tuesday, December 14th, 2021
It’s National Screwdriver Day.
The drink (not the tool) is at play.
I find vodka too rough.
Orange juice? I rebuff.
But together, great stuff, so hooray!
(Happy National Screwdriver Day, which falls on December 14.)
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, December Holidays, Drink Humor, Drink Limerick, Odd Holidays, Orange Juice, Screwdriver Day, Vodka, Vodka Humor, Vodka Limerick
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Odd Holidays | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, October 27th, 2021
Happy “National American Beer Day!” (October 27)
“American Beer Day” is here,
Making many compatriots cheer.
But not ME! “Why?” you ask.
Cuz my drink is a flask
Of tequila. No “Hear, hear!” to beer!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, American Beer Day, Beer Humor, Beer Limerick, Drink Holidays, National American Beer Day, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Tequila Humor, Tequila Limerick
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To “National American Beer Day”
Saturday, October 2nd, 2021
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BREAD or BRED at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SELF-CONTROL, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best SELF-CONTROL-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on October 17, 2021, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, October 16, 2021 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my BREAD or BRED-rhyme limerick:
A fellow with plenty of bread
Held a fete on his boat — a big spread.
Near the end of the bash
He dropped much of his cash
In the toilet. Wealth’s gone to his head.
And here’s my SELF-CONTROL-themed limerick:
I’m beginning to notice a lag in
Restraint from a pal who’s been braggin’
That he’s wholly off beer.
But I’m starting to fear
That my trucker friend fell off the wagon.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, Beer Humor, Beer Limerick, Competition Limerick, Drink Humor, Drink Limerick, Drinking Limerick, Idiom Humor, Idiom Limerick, Language Humor, Language Limerick, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Money & Finance Humor, Money Limerick, Party Humor, Party Limerick, Poetry & Prompts, Wealth Limerick, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Food & Drink Humor, Language Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Money & Finance Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 205 Comments »
Friday, October 1st, 2021
Although I share this woman’s fondness for cold sake, this limerick ISN’T about me. (Happy Sake Day!)
“No wonder our marriage was rocky;
All my ex does is eat and watch hockey.
And the chip on his shoulder
Is big as a boulder…
Plus Milwaukee has lousy cold sake.”
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, Alcohol Verse, Cold Sake, Divorce Humor, Divorce Limerick, Drink Humor, Drink Limerick, Liquor Humor, Liquor Limerick, Marriage Humor, Marriage Limerick, October Holidays, Odd Holidays, Sake, Sake Day, Sake Humor, Sake Limerick, World Sake Day
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Marriage Humor, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on For Heaven Sakes, Celebrate “Sake Day!” (Oct. 1) (Limerick)
Saturday, July 24th, 2021
Happy “National Tequila Day!” (July 24)
Tequila Day’s here, so let loose!
Drink it straight; don’t dilute it with juice.
You’d rather drink beer?
Bourbon? Gin? I won’t sneer.
More tequila for MOI! So a truce!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Limerick, Alcohol Verse, Beer, Bourbon, Drink Holidays, Drink Humor, Drink Limerick, Gin, July Holidays, Odd Holidays, Tequila, Tequila Humor, Tequila Limerick
Posted in Food & Drink Humor, Limericks, Odd Holidays | Comments Off on Limerick Ode To Tequila
Saturday, August 29th, 2020
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using WINE or WHINE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to DRIVING, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best DRIVING-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on September 13, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, September 12, 2020 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my WINE/WHINE-rhyme limerick:
A fellow would often combine
Hard liquor, champagne and red wine,
But he rarely got kicks
From his regular fix…
Though he DID get a box made of pine.
And here’s my DRIVING-themed limerick:
A woman would often lambast
Her husband for driving too fast.
He responded “I drive
Really quick cuz I strive
For an end to the time I’m harassed.”
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Car Limerick, Champagne Humor, Competition Limerick, Drinking Limerick, Driving Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Liquor Humor, Marriage Humor, Poetry & Prompts, Wine Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Behavior & Personality, Contests, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 157 Comments »
Saturday, June 6th, 2020
It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.
I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SINK or SYNC at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)
The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)
Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PUNCTUATION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PUNCTUATION-related limerick.
How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)
I’ll announce the winners on June 21, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 20, 2020 at 4 p.m. (Eastern Time.)
Here’s my SINK/SYNC-rhyme limerick:
I’m teetering right on the brink,
And it feels like my life’s out of sync.
I’m off of my feed.
So what do I need?
A shrink? Or another stiff drink?
And here’s my PUNCTUATION-themed limerick:
“You’ve a problem: You drink too much, pop.”
That comma’s essential – full stop!
Cuz without it the drinker
Is any old stinker…
And the bev’rage? Non-alcohol slop.
Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.
To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!
Tags: Alcohol Humor, Alcohol Verse, Anxiety Humor, Beverage Humor, Beverages, Binge Drinking, Competition Limerick, Drink Humor, Drinking Humor, Limerick Challenge, Limerick Contest, Poetry & Prompts, Psychiatry Humor, Shrinks, Therapy Humor, Writing Prompts
Posted in Anxiety & Stress, Behavior & Personality, Contests, Food & Drink Humor, Language Humor, Limerick & Haiku Prompts, Limerick Competition, Limerick Contest, Limerick Writing Contest, Limerick-Offs, Limericks, Poetry & Prompts, Poetry Contest | 97 Comments »
