When I hear the word “frankly,” I brace
For the speaker to lie to my face.
And the phrase “in all candor”
Means stand by for slander. . . .
I “quite honestly swear” that’s the case.
Archive for the ‘Behavior Humor’ Category
Truth-Telling? (Limerick)
Monday, November 2nd, 2026Scattered (Limerick)
Tuesday, October 27th, 2026I tried writing some verse about art,
But was off to a second-rate start:
My thoughts scattered, bespattered
By nonsense — brain battered.
ADD? But of course! Off the chart!
The Knock (Limerick)
Sunday, October 18th, 2026“I knocked and I knocked and I knocked.
No response from my aunt. Door’s unlocked.
I go in, now concerned
By the chairs, all upturned,
Not to mention a gun that is cocked.
‘She’s my niece,’ says my aunt. ‘Let her be.’
Then she hands me a glass of Chablis,
And she says, ‘Had a scare.
Called my cop pal Pierre.’
I shake hands with her cop ‘pal’ and flee.”
The Feud (Limerick)
Tuesday, October 6th, 2026“I abhor cousin Stewy, it’s true.
But don’t judge me for feuding with Stu:
Yes I harbor a grudge,
And I’m NOT gonna budge
Cuz he ‘borrowed’ and wrecked my canoe.”
The Talker (Limerick)
Monday, September 28th, 2026An old woman who’d filed for divorce
From a golfer who talked himself hoarse,
Watched her longwinded spouse
Rant and endlessly grouse,
Then replied, “This is par for the course.”
The Rager (Limerick)
Saturday, September 26th, 2026A young fellow who hungered for power
Almost always looked angry; He’d glower
And he’d rage, then just stare,
But when met with a glare,
The poor delicate flower would cower.
The Hoarder (Limerick)
Tuesday, September 22nd, 2026A disorganized hoarder named Bobby
Is divorced from a woman whose hobby
Is undoing disorder.
What happened? He bored her . . .
Plus EVEN for HER he’s TOO SLOBBY!
The Felon (Limerick)
Tuesday, September 22nd, 2026A felon was caught and convicted
Of serious acts interdicted.
After serving his time
He arranged for “sublime
Sweet revenge,” not the least bit conflicted.
The Arguer (Limerick)
Sunday, September 20th, 2026A talkative fellow who’ll jaw
About politics, science, and law,
Mostly has his facts wrong,
But starts arguments, long . . .
Which he “wins” via men made of straw.
Close Call (Limerick)
Thursday, September 17th, 2026An odd fellow who fell off a ledge,
Had been saved by an overgrown hedge.
“I was stoned. Tried to fly,”
Said the grateful young guy.
“Guess those drugs really are ‘bleeding edge.'”
Not Improving With Age (Limerick)
Tuesday, August 4th, 2026A dental technician named Ruth
Was viewed, in her youth, as uncouth.
As she aged, she got mean,
So she’s currently seen
As a scoundrel who’s long in the tooth.
