An old patient, impatiently waiting
For the doctor, was plotting his rating.
“Five-Thumbs-Down” it would be,
For he needed to pee,
Doc was late, and the muzak was grating.
The Impatient Patient (Limerick)
July 14th, 2026“Highly” Happy Limerick
July 10th, 2026A jovial student, while high,
Said “By Jove, I’m a real lucky guy!
I’ve been acing each test
And I’m feath’ring my nest
Using scams, with the help of AI.”
Failed Investment (Limerick)
July 8th, 2026A young fellow is swimming in debt,
Cuz he recklessly made a big bet
On a bus’ness that failed.
All his partners have bailed,
And he’s now been assailed by regret.
Failure to Communicate? (Limerick)
July 3rd, 2026“Please slow down and repeat what you said,”
A gal begged her impatient spouse Ned.
“And do NOT blame my ears:
After two or three beers,
Your words rush, veer, & tumble ahead.”
Lonesome Limerick
July 2nd, 2026“It is difficult living alone,”
Said a lonely old lady named Joan.
“But my problem’s been solved,
And it isn’t involved . . .
I just bother my kids on the phone.”
Apprehensive Limerick
July 2nd, 2026My limerick plays with the 2 meanings of APPREHENSION:
Apprehending the risk of arrest,
Two famed felons were doing their best
To evade apprehension
And prison detention.
They’re in jail. (They were right to be stressed!)
Seeing Red (Limerick)
June 30th, 2026“I was floored when I saw how he looked;
He’s so florid, you’d swear he’d been cooked.
Is it fever? The sun?
Is it both, or just one?
I sure hope that a doctor’s been booked!”
Dodging Gym (Limerick)
June 29th, 2026In my youth, I would hide during gym.
(I am klutzy and slow; skill set grim.)
Tossing balls? Not my speed!
As for catching ’em? Heed
What I say: Go find someone with vim!
Greedy Limerick
June 28th, 2026An old man whose largesse is well-known,
Has grown children who constantly moan
About “pushover dad.”
They are greedily mad
That he’s “squand’ring” what THEY “ought to own.”
The Quest For An Ending (Limerick and Haiku)
June 28th, 2026This limerick emerged from the haiku right below it
A new limerick’s starting to spark.
I believe I’m detecting an arc.
But alas, it’s still minus
A punchline: Lacks wryness!
A fun terminus! STAT! … or go dark.
*****
If I couldn’t write
while minus my terminus
I’d never begin.
Connected Limerick
June 25th, 2026A young man with connections galore
Is successful, but always wants more.
Though the guy’s full of bull,
His abundance of pull
Guarantees that he’ll never be poor.
Pity The Pedestrian (Limerick)
June 24th, 2026“I was almost mowed down by a bike,
After dodging a tyke on a trike,”
Said a gal, in a daze,
After walking a ways.
“I just wish they would all take a hike!”
Language Madness (Limerick)
June 22nd, 2026“Watch” and “Batch” look like rhyme-words. They’re not!
Our odd language is filled with such rot.
And this pain in our butts
Sure does drive poets nuts.
Hope it jams up each verse-writing bot!
Cluttered Limerick
June 21st, 2026“Please do SOMETHING with all of your clutter,
And for REAL this time. Don’t simply putter!”
What a common refrain,
Addressed mostly in vain
To a spouse who’ll evade or rebut her!
Unwanted Advice (Limerick)
June 18th, 2026“You adore telling folks what to do,
Most especially ME! Right on cue,
You’ll advise me to say
Or do something that’s cray.
Go away! (That’s my counsel to YOU!)”
Limerick Ode To The Knicks
June 18th, 2026My sports-viewing bent once was nil;
A mere sec gave me more than my fill.
This was true, till the Knicks
Somehow altered this chick’s
Predilections: Each game was a thrill!
The Gift (Limerick)
June 16th, 2026An old woman is terribly miffed;
It’s her birthday, so cue quite the rift:
Seems her spouse, ev’ry year,
Buys her negligee, sheer
(Which he knows she won’t wear) – as a “gift.”
Replacement Theory? (Limerick)
June 13th, 2026“I’m afraid that I’ll soon be replaced
By AI, though I always have aced
My reviews at the job,”
Said a guy, with a sob…
“So I need a rich lover post-haste!”
The Limerick-Writing Life
June 11th, 2026Many limericks start as a lark.
Some are spurred by a devilish spark,
That’s set off by a word
Or a phrase that’s absurd.
How to end them? I’m oft in the dark.
Anniversary Limerick For My Great Husband Mark
June 4th, 2026A limerick for my wonderful husband Mark Kane on our 48th Wedding Anniversary! Thanks for 48 great years, hon! (49, if you count the time from the moment we met.)
I felt like a misfit for years:
A feeling that drove me to tears.
But my life was re-set
On the day that I met
Mark G. Kane. To my husband, Three Cheers!
