Archive for the ‘Mental Health Humor’ Category

Happy Innovation Day (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 16th, 2016

Innovation does rate an ovation,
But from change I request a vacation.
So much newness unending
Is stressful, mind-bending.
For salvation I crave a cessation.

Happy National Innovation Day. (February 16).

A Limerick for International Day Of Yoga (June 21)

Saturday, June 20th, 2015

The U.N. has decreed June 21 to be International Day Of Yoga … which gives me a handy excuse to post this silly limerick:

A gal doing yoga while dressed
In a toga, when questioned, confessed
That her garb did not work—
Turned her poses berserk.
So instead of relaxed, she was stressed.

Multitask THIS! (Limerick)

Thursday, October 9th, 2014

Multitask THIS! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Multitasking is bad for your brain,
Says a study I read on the plane
While cleaning my purse,
Writing email and verse.
Now where WAS I? That study’s insane!

According to research done at Stamford University, we are all seriously screwed.

Limerick Ode To A Bad Memory

Tuesday, December 11th, 2012

Limerick Ode To A Bad Memory
By Madeleine Begun Kane

My memory’s terribly rotten,
So I don’t absorb data like cotton.
My mind’s for the birds
Cuz I keep losing words:
Hypermnesiac’s meaning? Forgotten!

Nutty Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, October 28th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner next Sunday, right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday at 11:59 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A man who was rather a nut…*

or

A gal who was rather a nut…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Nutty Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who was rather a nut
Held a broad definition of smut:
With standards unbending,
He’d freak when attending
A film, often shouting out “Cut!”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Yet Another Excuse To Eat Chocolate (Limerick)

Thursday, October 11th, 2012

Just what we all need — yet another reason to eat chocolate!

Eat chocolate, win a Nobel Prize?

It may sound far-fetched, but a new study suggests it might not be bad advice.

The results show countries that eat the most chocolate also have the highest number of Nobel laureates per capita.

Yet Another Excuse To Eat Chocolate (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If you want yet another excuse
To engage in some chocolate abuse,
It seems eating those sweets
Will create smart elites
And can Nobel Prize winners produce.

UPDATE: If you need a further excuse, I’ve just learned that December 16th is Chocolate Covered Anything Day.

Angst-Ridden Limerick (Acrostic Limerick)

Wednesday, September 12th, 2012

This month Acrostic Only asks for an acrostic limerick featuring the word ANGST. (An acrostic limerick spells out a word via the first letter of each line.)

So now you know why this limerick is definitely NOT funny:

Angst-Ridden Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Anxiety, fear, apprehension
Neurotically fill me with tension.
Getting out of my chair—
Somehow going somewhere
Tends to help with depression prevention.

Mental Limerick

Tuesday, July 24th, 2012

Poets United has a fun vice-versa challenge this week: Use all four of these words in any type of poem: Allow, Deny, Harsh, & Gentle. Here’s what I came up with:

Mental Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who denied being “mental,”
Was at times rather harsh, sometimes gentle.
He had one sacred cow:
He would never allow
A critique of his units parental.

Embedded In Sleeplessness (Limerick)

Wednesday, June 27th, 2012

Embedded In Sleeplessness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Insomnia blankets my night.
Slumber teases — declines to alight.
I toss and I turn
In my bed, as I yearn
For release from my sleep-deprived plight.

(Prompted by Theme Thursday’s “beds.”)

In Defense Of TV (Limerick)

Friday, June 8th, 2012

From time to time, somebody annoys me with bald assertions like this: “I don’t own a TV; they rot the brain.”

I usually ignore them, but NOT this time:

In Defense Of TV (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

There is good stuff and bad on TV.
Some will rot out your brain, I agree.
(Fox News comes to mind.)
But there’s great stuff to find.
Just be choosy and spurn the debris.

Overpriced Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Saturday, May 12th, 2012

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A gal in an overpriced store…*

or

A man in an overpriced store…*

*(Minor variations to my first lines are acceptable, but rhyme words may not be altered.)

Here’s my limerick:

Overpriced Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A gal in an overpriced store,
Who’d completely forgotten what for,
Told the clerk, “Can’t recall
Why I came here at all.
Just as well. If I could, I’d be poor.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

No Longer Tickered Out (Limerick)

Thursday, September 22nd, 2011

Regular readers know that Facebook’s News Ticker has been driving me mad! It’s also driven me to write three anti-Facebook limericks.

If you share my problem, or if you simply feel sorry for me, you’ll be pleased to know I’ve uncovered a solution: Google Chrome has an extension that makes Facebook’s annoying Ticker vanish.

I’ve installed it and the extension works great. No more News Ticker. Yippee!

Time to celebrate with a limerick:

No Longer Tickered Out
By Madeleine Begun Kane

My outlook is better today
Cuz I’ve sent Facebook’s Ticker away:
Yes, a cool Chrome extension
Does Ticker prevention.
To Google, big thanks and hooray!

Ticked Off By Facebook’s Ticker (2 Limericks)

Wednesday, September 21st, 2011

I’ve been trying to find something good to say about Facebook’s new News Feed, and here it is: It’s very inspirational! Last night it inspired me to write this dizzy limerick. And now I’ve written two more:

If you like things that constantly flicker,
You’re sure to enjoy Facebook’s ticker.
As for me, I must flee:
My sore brain needs Chablis,
So I’m off for some Advil and liquor.

*****

I am not one to bitch and to bicker,
But I hate Facebook’s stupid new ticker.
It makes my brain ache!
How much more can I take?
Enough with the scrolling and flicker!

*****

(Here’s a fun post about limericks, where you can submit your own.)

UPDATE: Good news! I’ve found a solution to Facebook’s terrible News Ticker problem. You can read all about it here, including a celebratory limerick.

Limerick Ode To Facebook’s Dizzying Changes

Wednesday, September 21st, 2011

Much to my surprise, I’ve found myself defending Facebook lately. For instance, I think its new subscription feature is a great idea. But an even newer change is driving me nuts — the ever-scrolling News Feed on the upper right corner of the screen. The damn thing is making me so dizzy, I can’t even think straight.

Limerick Ode To Facebook’s Dizzying Changes
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Facebook, you’re making me dizzy
Cuz your feed on the right is too busy.
I’ll say this politely:
Your scrolling’s unsightly.
I am now in an A.D.D. tizzy.

(I’ve written two more limericks about Facebook’s annoying new Ticker here.)

UPDATE: Good news! I’ve found a solution to Facebook’s terrible News Ticker problem. You can read all about it here, including a celebratory limerick.

Nonplussed By GooglePlus?

Wednesday, July 20th, 2011

Nonplussed by Google-Plus?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Is Google-Plus blessing or curse?
It’s surely inspired some verse.
But here’s what I fear:
With the Plus option here,
My A.D.D.’s getting much worse.

Spurned Limerick (Limerick-Off Monday)

Sunday, May 1st, 2011

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same first line. Then you post your limerick here and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

The best submission will be crowned Limerick Of The Week. (Here’s last week’s Limerick Of The Week Winner plus four Honorable Mentions.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, and cleverness. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here are two excellent resources: OEDILF on Writing A Limerick and Speedy Snail’s Limerick Rhythm and Meter.)

I’ll announce the Limerick of the Week Winner right before I post next week’s Limerick-Off. So that gives you a full week to submit your clever, polished verse.

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A gal had to cancel her plan…

or

A man had to cancel his plan…

Here’s mine. (It’s a two-verse limerick, but a standard one-verser will be fine, of course.)

Spurned Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A gal had to cancel her plan
To marry a very cute man.
He spurned her advances,
Ignored all her glances —
‘Twas over before it began.

She was angry and wanted him dead —
Dreamt of murder while lying in bed.
Now at last he’s been killed
And those thoughts have been stilled,
For that fellow was all in her head.

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please send me an email requesting the alerts. You’ll find my email address on the upper right sidebar, in the “Author” section just below my Limerick-Offs button. Thanks!

Attention Must Be Paid

Wednesday, April 13th, 2011

Here’s my limerick and haiku prompted by this attention prompt and this challenge to write about writing:

Attention Must Be Paid
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I find paying attention’s a pain.
A-D-D makes it rather a drain.
I’m drifting right now.
Lost in thought? Yes, and how!
Which is why this short story’s inane.

*****

Must pay attention
to pretentious professor.
Can’t? Then pretend to.

*****

Mental Haiku Duet

Sunday, March 27th, 2011

Left brain or right brain —
Which am I? The one, I fear,
that can’t remember.

*****

Creative options
seem nearly unlimited —
overwhelmed, I freeze.

*****

(The 2nd haiku was prompted by Writer’s Island’s unlimited and Sunday Scribblings’ nearly.)

Secret Cache

Saturday, March 5th, 2011

Secret Cache
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A fellow had a secret cache
of coins and stamps and gold.
He planned to sell it off one day
when he became quite old.

That time did come for him at last—
age ninety-three or more.
Alas, he’d thrown his cache box out—
forgot what it was for.

(You can find more of my bad memory humor here. And check out the secret prompt over at Writer’s Island)

Hoping For Humor (Sundry Verse)

Thursday, March 3rd, 2011

Today I’ve written four poems on a theme called hope. There’s a pair of quatrains, one haiku, and a limerick — something for everyone, or no one, as the case may be:

Hope springs eternal—
a “truism” some speak.
Yes, hope springs eternal,
until it springs a leak.

*****

Alexander Pope
wrote about hope.
His eternal quote
helps some folks cope.

*****

Showing up to vote—
a yearly exercise in
unrequited hope.

*****

A gal who is often caught moping
And is terribly dreadful at coping
Drives her family mad.
Things have gotten so bad,
That they’re hoping to hear she’s eloping.

*****

(Inspired by Haiku Wednesday’s hope prompt and Poets United quotation prompt. For more optimistic poems see Friday Poetically.)