Archive for the ‘Science Humor’ Category

Footloose Limerick

Thursday, May 9th, 2024

The next time you hear about or (even worse) run across a disembodied foot that’s washed ashore, there’s a solid scientific explanation: “Feet easily disarticulate and when they are attached to a flotation device such as a running shoe, they are easily washed ashore…”

This calls for a limerick, don’t you think?

You wear running shoes? Try not to drown!
If you do while they’re on, you’ll stay down,
Except for your feet,
Which will fall off — not neat —
Float to shore and draw many a frown.

Something ELSE To Worry About (Limerick)

Wednesday, March 9th, 2022

If only I were making this story up: Headline: “Giant spiders expected to drop from sky across the East Coast this spring”

“Giant spiders,” East Coast-bound, this spring;
Using parachute-webs, down they’ll swing.
“Invasive,” yet “harmless?”
I’m far from alarmless
O’er spider hordes — beasts on the wing.

The Blathering Botanist (Limerick)

Saturday, November 20th, 2021

John the botanist’s dull as can be.
His life is a blathering spree.
He ignores all my pleas
To stop shooting the breeze,
And can talk all the bark off a tree.

Limerick Ode To Science

Wednesday, November 10th, 2021

A silly limerick to celebrate “World Science Day.” (November 10)

I’m bewildered by scholarly articles
About physics and virtual particles.
Since I’m dense about science,
I’m prone to reliance
On lim’ricks to bolster my smarticles.

Limerick Ode To World Laboratory Day

Monday, April 23rd, 2018

Happy World Laboratory Day! (April 23)

A fellow who worked in a lab
Helped discover a cure rather fab.
But alas he was bought;
He blabbed and got caught.
Now his body’s laid out on a slab.

Happy Scotch Tape Day (January 31)

Sunday, January 31st, 2016

Though my mem’ry’s, alas, on the wane,
Here’s a day that should stick to my brain:
It’s for Richard G. Drew.
He did NOT invent glue,
But our bond with his Scotch Tape shall reign.

Happy Scotch Tape Day!

Limerick Ode To Galileo’s Telescope

Thursday, December 3rd, 2015

A celebratory limerick for Telescope Day.

Galileo perfected in spades
The magnificent gadget that aids
Us in viewing the stars
And the planets, like Mars.
Of course, NOW we need curtains and shades.

Let Them Eat … Insects? (Limerick)

Thursday, October 15th, 2015

Are bugs more nutritious than meat?
In a study on what we should eat,
The answer was “yes.”
I am bugged and confess
That I’d sooner eat peat or concrete.

This Limerick’s No Lie

Wednesday, September 23rd, 2015

A title like this cries out for a limerick: “The lies we tell are more convincing when we need to pee.”

Here’s a lesson from science ― the key
To a credible lie-telling spree:
A bladder that’s full
Leads to plausible bull.
Do your lying when desp’rate to pee.

Researchers Belabor The Obvious (Limerick)

Tuesday, September 8th, 2015

Some facts are self-evident, including the results of this study of cats.

Researchers Belabor The Obvious (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Does a cat miss its owner and pout?
Just in case you were feeling some doubt,
Felines ain’t like a hound,
A study has found.
It took science to figure this out?

Limerick Ode To Pluto

Monday, July 13th, 2015

With all the renewed attention on Pluto, I’m hoping it will be re-designated a planet instead of a measly “dwarf planet.”

I often like staring at stars
And at planets, like Venus and Mars.
How I pity poor Pluto–
’Twas given the boot — oh
To be “plutoed” must surely leave scars.

Pluto Day is February 18th, in honor of its discovery on that day in 1930 at Lowell Observatory in Flagstaff, Arizona, by astronomer Clyde W. Tombaugh.

Multitask THIS! (Limerick)

Thursday, October 9th, 2014

Multitask THIS! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Multitasking is bad for your brain,
Says a study I read on the plane
While cleaning my purse,
Writing email and verse.
Now where WAS I? That study’s insane!

According to research done at Stamford University, we are all seriously screwed.

Fruity Study? (Limerick)

Tuesday, July 15th, 2014

Fruity Study? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though I don’t want to lead you astray,
It appears that an apple a day
Is a way to enhance
A gal’s sex life, perchance.
I’m not ribbing you. Mālum? Hooray!

According to a sex study with a rather small sample size, apples might possibly be a libido booster.

Limerick Ode To The Stove

Wednesday, June 11th, 2014

Limerick Ode To The Stove
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A stove is a handy device.
For cooking, some say, it works nice.
I can’t speak to that fact,
For I don’t interact
Well with kitchens. I can, though, boil rice.

Today in Kitchen History: On June 11, 1793, Robert Haeterick was granted the first American stove patent for a stove design of cast iron.

I’m Attached To Tape (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

I just discovered a delicious factoid: what we now know as Scotch Tape was invented by a banjo player who worked for 3M. The inventor, Richard Gurley Drew, patented his adhesive tape on May 27, 1930.

I’m Attached To Tape (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Picture life without 3M Scotch Tape:
Stuff we need to affix would escape.
Paper’s bound to be freed
(Sticky wicket, indeed!)
While we’re stuck, all unglued and agape.

Happy Cellophane Tape Day!

Cursing’s Healthy, I Swear (Limerick)

Thursday, May 15th, 2014

Cursing’s Healthy, I Swear (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

New research, Brit experts declare,
Has revealed that it’s healthy to swear.
So you damn SOBs,
No more slamming my ease
With the expletive. Carpers beware!

An Eclipsed Eclipse (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 15th, 2014

An Eclipsed Eclipse (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Last night, I kept searching the skies
For that promised “blood moon,” but my eyes
Were betrayed by the pall
Cast by clouds — a thick wall,
Which cut my dream view down to size.

No Longer In The Dark About Decision-Making (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 26th, 2014

This interesting study sheds some light on how we make decisions: According to scientists at the University of Toronto Scarborough, people think more objectively when in darkness, making more rational decisions when the lights are dimmed.

No Longer In The Dark About Decision-Making (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Here’s a study with insight that’s stark:
Our reasoning’s best in the dark.
Need to make a decision?
Dim light aids your vision.
Watch lucid enlightenment spark.

In A Pig’s Eye!

Sunday, December 1st, 2013

I rarely write science-related limericks. But I just couldn’t resist this headline: “‘Humans evolved after a female chimpanzee mated with a pig’: Extraordinary claim made by American geneticist.”

In A Pig’s Eye!
By Madeleine Begun Kane

You might ask how a masculine pig
Got a chimp that was female to dig
Him enough to have sex.
I’m guessing a hex,
Using feathers and maybe a fig.

Mars Haiku Contest Results

Thursday, November 21st, 2013

Earlier this year, NASA held a Mars haiku contest, which was managed by the University of Colorado. You can read the winning Mars haiku entries here.

I didn’t win, but my second haiku (the sappy one) got just enough votes to qualify to be included in the DVD that will accompany MAVEN on its journey to and around the Red Planet.

Here are my two entries:

Sorry to barge in.
We don’t mean to make rubble,
but we’re out of space.

***

Earth’s promise to Mars:
We vow to treat you better
than we treat ourselves.

***