Posts Tagged ‘May Holidays’

Happy Brothers Day! (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 24th, 2016

Oh brother! It’s Brothers Day. Wow!
I’ve got me a good one. And how!
With a heart off the chart
Arthur (now known as Art)
Is unrivaled. Please Art, take a bow.

Brothers Day (May 24) is actually meant to celebrate the bond between brothers. But since I missed Brother And Sister Day on March 26, and Siblings Day on April 10, this will have to do.

Asparagus Day? Why? (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 24th, 2016

Asparagus doesn’t appeal to me,
And it guts what might be a good meal to me.
Brussels sprouts can be yummy.
With brocc’li I’m chummy.
But asparagus spears are “no deal” to me.

May 24 is Asparagus Day.

Happy “Be A Millionaire Day!” (Limerick)

Friday, May 20th, 2016

For some with a wealth-building mission,
“Be A Millionaire Day’s” a tradition.
And today is the day;
Yes each 20th of May
They display their great LACK of ambition.

Limerick Ode To Golf

Wednesday, May 18th, 2016

Since it’s Golf Day, I thought I’d address
My embarrassing lack of finesse
Playing golf; Any game
That requires an aim
Leaves me minimal chance of success.

Happy “Odometer Day!” (Limerick)

Thursday, May 12th, 2016

An odometer’s great when I drive,
As I try to guess when we’ll arrive.
But I also get mileage
From lims — even smileage.
But no limming while driving — no jive!

May 12th is National Odometer Day.

Limerick Ode To The School Nurse

Wednesday, May 11th, 2016

Gals remember your trusty school nurse?
You’d tell her, “I’m sick. It’s ‘the curse.’
I have to skip gym
And lie down. All my vim
Has vamoosed and the pain’s getting worse!”

(National School Nurse Day falls on the Wednesday of National Nurse Week, which is May 6 through May 12.)

In Intuition I Trust (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 10th, 2016

“Intuition is something I trust,”
Said a gal when told trust is a must.
“I instinctively feel
That you’re surely a heel
Who would tempt me with feelings of lust.”

May 10th is Trust Your Intuition Day.

Limerick Ode To Lost Sock Memorial Day

Monday, May 9th, 2016

AWOL socks are a grim laundry given;
Former pairs inexplicably riven,
Dresser drawers oddly littered
With orphans, embittered
And wond’rin’ where old mates are livin’.

May 9 is National Lost Sock Memorial Day.

Over-Excited About “No Pants Day?” Please Keep Your Pants On!

Friday, May 6th, 2016

A man who was known for his rants
Was caught on the street with no pants.
He was standing half-nude
With a bellicose tude,
On par with his usual stance.

But he HAD a defense for his act
That accounts for the clothing he lacked;
The fellow’s fine mission
Was spur recognition —
“No Pants Day’s” today! That’s a fact.

Happy “No Pants Day!” (First Friday of May)

Happy Petite And Proud Day! (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 4th, 2016

If you’re five-four or under, “petite”
Is what many will call you. Don’t cheat
And pretend to be taller;
Be proud that you’re smaller…
Then savor a thick booster seat.

May 4 is Petite And Proud Day.

And yes, at only five-zero, I’ve been known to use a “booster” provided by a Broadway Theater — the very same one used (according to an usher) by Peter Dinklage.

Limerick Ode To Sundry Bird Days

Wednesday, May 4th, 2016

It’s time for a string of rhymed words
To acknowledge this day for the birds.
And to those who cry foul
With an anti-lim howl,
How dare you insult lim’rick nerds!

There are three separate bird days, that I know of: Bird Day, National Bird Day and Migratory Bird Day

Bird Day is today, May 4. National Bird Day falls on January 5. And Migratory Bird Day is celebrated on the second Saturday in May.

Limerick Ode To Teachers

Tuesday, May 3rd, 2016

A professor, while teaching a class,
Called one of his students an ass;
Not a classy remark,
But his class (this is stark)
Loudly cheered his assessment en masse.

National Teacher Day, also known as Teacher Appreciation Day, is celebrated during the first full week of May, on a Tuesday.

Limerick Ode To Mismatched Shoes

Tuesday, May 3rd, 2016

If you’re wearing a shoe that is black
And another that’s brown, is that wack?
Not today; On May third
It’s endorsed – not absurd –
Your defense, should you get any flack.

Happy Wear Two Different Colored Shoes Day. (May 3)

Holiday Tip (Limerick)

Thursday, May 21st, 2015

Holiday Tip (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m presenting a holiday tip.
No it’s not what you think. Get a grip!
It is Waitstaff Day. See?
And I’m sure you’ll agree
That those folks deserve more than this quip.

(National Waitstaff Day — May 21)

Happy Limerick Day (and Edward Lear’s Birthday) (May 12)

Tuesday, May 12th, 2015

My lim’rick obsession’s severe;
I write rhymes night and day ev’ry year.
My addiction is brutal.
Resistance is futile…
And I warrant the fault lies with Lear.

Happy birthday, Edward Lear, and Happy Limerick Day!

Limerick Ode to National Beverage Day (May 6)

Wednesday, May 6th, 2015

Limerick Ode to National Beverage Day (May 6)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

It’s National Beverage Day
The vaguest of days, you might say,
Cuz your options are fluid;
Each bev’rage will do it.
Drink anything — scotch the bouquet.

Happy World Naked Gardening Day (1st Saturday of May)

Friday, May 1st, 2015

Happy World Naked Gardening Day (1st Saturday of May)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Naked Gardening Day is tomorrow.
As I write this, I shudder with sorrow.
So I strongly advise:
Stay indoors, avert eyes…
Or give gard’ners some clothes they can borrow.

A Lemon Of A Limerick

Wednesday, August 20th, 2014

A Lemon Of A Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“Turn lemons to lemonade?” Ugh!
Such advice sounds to me oh so smug.
No I won’t sugar-coat,
Cuz it sticks in my throat.
But turn lemons to lim’ricks? We’ll hug.

Happy National Lemonade Day! (For some odd reason, it’s celebrated both on August 20th and on the first Sunday of May.)

Limerick Ode To “Women In Trousers Day”

Wednesday, May 28th, 2014

Limerick Ode To Women In Trousers Day (May 28)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear damsels in pants, take a bow
Cuz it’s “Women In Trousers Day” now.
Seems in Nineteen-Two-Three
On this day, the AG
Said you must allow gals to wear trow.

I’m Attached To Tape (Limerick)

Tuesday, May 27th, 2014

I just discovered a delicious factoid: what we now know as Scotch Tape was invented by a banjo player who worked for 3M. The inventor, Richard Gurley Drew, patented his adhesive tape on May 27, 1930.

I’m Attached To Tape (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Picture life without 3M Scotch Tape:
Stuff we need to affix would escape.
Paper’s bound to be freed
(Sticky wicket, indeed!)
While we’re stuck, all unglued and agape.

Happy Cellophane Tape Day!