Posts Tagged ‘Money Humor’

Another Useless “Holiday” (Limerick)

Saturday, January 27th, 2024

For some inexplicable reason, today, January 27th, is “Punch The Clock Day.”

“Punch The Clock Day’s” (I’ll wager) a crock.
Why celebrate methods to dock
Someone’s pay? It’s absurd!
Moreover, I’m spurred
When awakened to punch that damn clock!

UPDATE: Limerick-Off Deadline Postponed One Week Due to Illness! New Submission Deadline: Jan. 13, 2024 Sorry! Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S at the end of any one line

Saturday, December 9th, 2023

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S at the end of ANY ONE LINE. (A homonym or homophone not listed here may be used in lieu of the designated rhyme word.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s the last contest’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PERKS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PERK-related limerick.

And for a THIRD SEPARATE CHALLENGE, I’ve used a “Random Word Generator” to generate five random words. Your challenge is to use AT LEAST TWO of the Random Words anywhere in your limericks.

Here are the FIVE RANDOM WORDS for this contest:
CLUMSY, CONDEMNED, ODDS, SHAKE, WAVES.

(You’re free to singularize/pluralize the designated random nouns and to change the tense of the designated random verbs. You can even turn adjectives in adverbs and vice versa. And you are NOT required to use any of them as rhyme words, as long as at least two of the words appear somewhere in your limericks.)

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on January 7, 2024, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you FOUR full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, January 6, 2024 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my GOAL or GOALS or GOAL’S-Rhyme Limerick:

“What’s your preference? Bagels or rolls?”
Asked a bakery-bound woman. “My goal’s
A quick breakfast, then work.”
Her new boyfriend, a jerk,
Said “I favor the flavor of holes.”

And here’s my PERK-Themed Limerick:

A cocky young teen liked to smirk
And would frequently act like a jerk.
When ordered to shed
His rudeness, he said:
“I’m rich, and I’m told it’s a perk.”

And here is my RANDOM WORD GENERATOR Limerick:

A clumsy old fellow named Ken
Was so klutzy that men now and then
Would call him a clod
And condemn him as odd,
While his ex-wife would nod an “amen.”

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

The Party Planner (Limerick)

Friday, November 10th, 2023

A fellow was planning a bash;
Pricey food, flashy site, quite the splash!
But it didn’t go well;
Can’t have fun from a cell.
(He had funded his fete with filched cash.)

Barber On The Brink (Limerick)

Monday, May 15th, 2023

A barber was desp’rate to save
His business. (His landlord’s a knave.)
A backer appeared
As his court deadline neared;
All in all, ’twas a very close shave.

The Would-Be Borrower (Limerick)

Saturday, May 6th, 2023

A gambler I know, who’s a heel,
Asked to borrow some cash for a meal:
“I lost my last dime,
But I win all the time,
So just one crappy hand’s no big deal!”

Grand Shopping Plans (Limerick)

Monday, November 7th, 2022

When I priced grand pianos today,
I heard quotes, grandiose, with dismay.
They cost too many grand,
And my right and left hand
Lack the cash to buy keyboard cachet.

*****
Happy World Pianist Day! (November 8)