Posts Tagged ‘Alcohol Verse’

Screw It? (Limerick)

Thursday, December 14th, 2023

It’s “Screwdriver Day.” Yay! Hooray!
Which type should be cheered? Well, they say
It’s the drink; not the tool.
(The reverse would be cruel.)
I intend to start early. Good day!

(National Screwdriver Day is celebrated on December 14th.)

Happy Margarita Day (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 22nd, 2022

Margarita’s a fave in our house.
If I drink one in bars, though, I’ll grouse;
They are weak and too sweet
And consistently beat
By the great ones prepared by my spouse.

(Happy National Margarita Day, which falls each year on February 22.)

For Heaven Sakes, Celebrate “Sake Day!” (Oct. 1) (Limerick)

Friday, October 1st, 2021

Although I share this woman’s fondness for cold sake, this limerick ISN’T about me. (Happy Sake Day!)

“No wonder our marriage was rocky;
All my ex does is eat and watch hockey.
And the chip on his shoulder
Is big as a boulder…
Plus Milwaukee has lousy cold sake.”

Limerick Ode To Tequila

Saturday, July 24th, 2021

Happy “National Tequila Day!” (July 24)

Tequila Day’s here, so let loose!
Drink it straight; don’t dilute it with juice.
You’d rather drink beer?
Bourbon? Gin? I won’t sneer.
More tequila for MOI! So a truce!

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SINK or SYNC at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: June 20, 2020 at 4 p.m. Eastern)

Saturday, June 6th, 2020

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SINK or SYNC at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to PUNCTUATION, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best PUNCTUATION-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on June 21, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, June 20, 2020 at 4 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my SINK/SYNC-rhyme limerick:

I’m teetering right on the brink,
And it feels like my life’s out of sync.
I’m off of my feed.
So what do I need?
A shrink? Or another stiff drink?

And here’s my PUNCTUATION-themed limerick:

“You’ve a problem: You drink too much, pop.”
That comma’s essential – full stop!
Cuz without it the drinker
Is any old stinker…
And the bev’rage? Non-alcohol slop.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Not Tickled Pink Over Rosé (Limerick)

Wednesday, August 14th, 2019

I’m not a big fan of rosé.
Drink anything pink? I say “Nay!”
I’ll have white wine or red,
Or some cognac, instead.
Even better, tequila! Olé!

Happy International Rosé Day! (August 14)

Limerick Ode To World Gin Day

Saturday, June 8th, 2019

Happy World Gin Day! (2nd Saturday in June)

A salty old boor who likes gin
Claims an ill-made martini’s a sin.
How he’ll grumble and snipe,
As he gins up each gripe!
Those poor bartenders never can win.

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: at the end of any one line CORE or CORPS or DÉCOR

Saturday, December 1st, 2018

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using CORE or CORPS or DÉCOR at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SPICE, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best spice-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on December 16, 2018, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, December 15, 2018 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

This drink was a very “light pour.”
If you’d like to be paid, pour me more!
Here’s my other complaint
Which is likely to taint
Your review: piss-poor taste in décor.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode To Bourbon Day

Tuesday, June 14th, 2016

Today is a big day for bourbon,
But my taste for it doesn’t need curbin’.
Now tequila and wine
And cognac are fine.
But the flavor of bourbon? Disturbin’!

Happy National Bourbon Day! (June 14)

Happy “Take A Cruise Day!” (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 3rd, 2016

For some inexplicable reason, today’s “Take A Cruise Day,” which is my excuse for this limerick:

While a fellow was off on a cruise,
He smoked grass and kept knocking back booze.
“When I’m seasick,” he said,
“Weed and hootch soothe my head.
And I’d rather be woozy from wooze*.”

* “Wooze” is slang for the combination of weed and booze.

Limerick Ode to National Scotch Day (July 27)

Monday, July 27th, 2015

Limerick Ode To National Scotch Day
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I hate to complain or to carp.
About liquor it’s rare that I harp.
But I’d scotch any notion
Of drinking a potion
Whose wet-carpet smell is so sharp.

Bar Talk (Limerick)

Friday, August 1st, 2014

Bar Talk Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man had enjoyed a good year
And was trying to spread some good cheer.
But others whose luck
Had been worse said, “Hey schmuck,
Just stop talking and pay for our beer.”

Happy International Beer Day! (First Friday in August)

Distilling The Truth (Limerick)

Tuesday, July 29th, 2014

Distilling The Truth
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Don’t sulk, but the bulk of the rye
Labeled heirloom’s a hand-crafted lie;
Many crafty booze sellers
Are re-seller fellers–
Small-batch fees for a factory buy.

*****

Yes that special, hand-crafted, small-batch, artisan, heirloom whiskey may really come from MGP, a large factory/distillery in Indiana.