Limerick of the Week (131)

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off.

Congratulations to Will T. Laughlin, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:

Dear Boss: as your ears and your eyes,
I’m one of the best of your spies.
Still… unless ficus trees
Are expected to sneeze,
They may have seen through my disguise.

Congratulations to Chris Doyle, who wins this week’s Facebook Friends’ Choice Award for this limerick which received the most Facebook “likes.”

Manhattan has opened my eyes
To a deli where bread is the prize.
It’s chewy, nutritious,
And truly delicious!
Try Katz’s — the site for sour ryes.

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Craig Dykstra, Ira Bloom, Gary Hallock, Sue Dulley, Chris Doyle, Kevin Ahern, and Bill Klein. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:

Craig Dykstra:

A nympho with beautiful eyes
Treated men to a flash of her thighs.
With a wink and a leer
She’d say “What I’ve got here
Is a thing you should try on for sighs.”

Ira Bloom:

A woman with stars in her eyes,
Said “My art I will not compromise.
I can sing, dance and act,
A young Garbo, in fact.
By the way, would you like that with fries?”

Gary Hallock:

The vote from young men is all “ayes”
When a pole dancer gyrates her thighs.
I also should mention
They’ll stand at attention
Although, from their seats, they don’t rise.

Sue Dulley:

A woman with near-perfect eyes
On contacts and glasses relies,
The former for schmoozing,
The latter for boozing,
And specs when she wants to look wise.

Chris Doyle:

She was not, by the look in her eyes,
All that pleased by my biceps and thighs.
I got very low scores
Till she checked in my drawers
And said, “Whoa, that’s economy-size!”

Kevin Ahern:

To parents all rolling their eyes
At the questions their children devise,
Please, do not get weary;
For every query
“Because” is a word to the whys.

Bill Klein:

A woman with nearsighted eyes
Felt the moisture that dampened her thighs.
Her man, with alarm,
Said “You’re sucking my arm,”
Which cut her mood back down to size.

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.

In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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4 Responses to “Limerick of the Week (131)”

  1. Jane Hoffman says:

    Congrats to all the winners!!!!!!

  2. Sue Dulley says:

    Thanks for the mention, Mad. This one’s special. And congrats to winners and the other mentionees.

  3. Dr. Goose says:

    These are some classics – I must atone next week for missing all the fun on Yom Kippur.

  4. colonialist says:

    There are some clever ones, some really clever ones, and some really really clever ones!