Limerick of the Week (122)

It’s time to announce the latest Limerick of the Week based on submissions (on this blog and on Facebook) in last week’s Limerick-Off.

Congratulations to CRAIG DYKSTRA, who wins Limerick of the Week for this funny verse:

“I am telling you, Brother Jabbar,
As a terrorist you will go far.
Simply put on this vest,
We’ll take care of the rest.”
They found bits of Jabbar in Qatar.

Congratulations to both IRA BLOOM and EDMUND CONTI, who in a tie, each win a Facebook Friends’ Choice Award, given to limericks receiving the most Facebook “likes.”

Ira Bloom:

A pirate walked into a bar,
After pillaging towns near and far.
“Are you here for a raid?”
Asked a buxom barmaid.
“Nay, me wench,” he said, “just arrr and arrr.”

Edmund Conti:

A rabbi walks into a bar
With a priest and an old commissar,
A Hindu, of course,
Plus a man on a horse–
Damn! There goes my whole repertoire.

And congratulations to these Honorable Mention winners (in random order) Scott Crowder, Jim Delaney, Colleen Murphy, Jon Gearhart, and Tim James. Here are their respective Honorable Mention limericks:

Scott Crowder:

A fellow who works at a bar
Has proved himself quite under par.
He doesn’t know Jack,
His White Russians are black,
And he thinks Cabernet is a car.

Jim Delaney:

This young fellow, though called to the bar,
As an advocate isn’t a star.
In the courtroom he stands
In his wig and his bands,
While his clients wear feathers and tar.

Colleen Murphy:

A man bellied up to the bar,
But could push in his stool just so far.
From a lifetime of beers,
The man’s belly appears
Like the roof of a Volkswagen car.

Jon Gearhart:

A dancer who stretched at the barre,
Once stretched just a little too far.
You can tell cause he walks
With a limp, and he talks
Twice higher than Pat Benatar.

Tim James:

A waitress who worked in a bar
With drunken old letches would spar.
She said, “This is so not
What I planned when I got
My art hist’ry degree from Bryn Mawr.”

Congratulations again to all the winners for your wonderful limericks. And thanks to everyone for your fun submissions.

In the next couple of minutes I’ll be posting a new Limerick-Off, which gives you yet another opportunity to win Limerick Of The Week.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

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9 Responses to “Limerick of the Week (122)”

  1. Congratulations Craig, Ira, Edmund, and all the HMs. Nice limericks, all! And thanks to MBK for hosting this wonderful forum!

  2. Craig says:

    Wow – I’m shocked and honored. Thanks, Mad!

    Lots of great limericks this week.

  3. Jane Hoffman says:

    Congrats to all the winners!!!!

  4. Jon Gearhart says:

    Congrats to all. There were a lot of really good ones. I don’t envy MBK having to pick a winner.

  5. Edmund Conti says:

    I’m shocked too. Shocked that Craig is shocked. But unshockingly, I’m honored.

  6. It must have been hard to choose among these excellent limericks!

  7. Craig says:

    Not surprisingly, I’m not surprised that Edmund is shocked.

  8. Fred Bortz says:

    Another fun week!

  9. madkane says:

    Congratulations again to all the winners!