Posts Tagged ‘Wordplay Humor’

Undone By Punning? (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 15th, 2024

“Stop the punning! I’m begging you, hon.
It’s not normal to constantly pun.
You’re driving me nuts!
No ifs, ands, or buts!”
The rejoinder: “Butt out, or we’re done!”

The Pros(e) And Cons Of English (Limerick)

Sunday, March 31st, 2024

Written English is often bemusing
And it’s frequently downright confusing.
But it can be the source
Of fun wordplay, of course…
When my lazy-ass muse isn’t snoozing.

Buttering Up A Farmer (Limerick)

Sunday, October 2nd, 2022

“After seeing your farm, I’m agog
At its beautiful pigpen. My dog
Doesn’t live half as well!
The big barn where pigs dwell
Is superb! They live high on the hog.”

*****

Happy World Farm Animals Day! (October 2)

A Colorful Exchange (Limerick)

Sunday, August 7th, 2022

Sometimes, when I play with a new-to-me word, I get a bit silly:

“What color’s your purse?” asked a nurse.
“A deep purple?” The answer: “It’s ‘perse!’”
“Yes, I know. But what shade
Is your pocketbook’s suede?”
“I said ‘perse!’” (Plus a colorful curse.)

A Recipe For Trouble (Limerick)

Saturday, May 21st, 2022

An annoying acquaintance loves roe
And dishes all covered in dough.
He’ll eat beef by the herd
And most any old bird,
But he’ll always refuse to eat crow.

Happy “Abet and Aid Punsters Day!” (Limerick)

Monday, November 8th, 2021

Today, November 8, is “Abet and Aid Punsters Day.” So I thought I’d celebrate with a limerick, even though it should really be called “Aid and Abet Punsters Day.”

Though punsters are often accorded
Acclaim for their skill and awarded
Applause for their verse,
Sometimes even a purse,
Grinches bitch that their wordplay is sordid.

Messy Limerick

Wednesday, October 20th, 2021

A gal, an industrious knitter,
Showed a huge heap of knits to her sitter:
“It’s a mess, I confess.
If you sort it, dear Tess,
I shall give you the pick of the litter.”

(Worldwide Knit In Public Day is the 2nd Saturday of June.)

Secret Affairs (Limerick)

Monday, October 18th, 2021

Two women, good friends, worked backstage.
Each was “dating” a man half her age:
A man on the crew.
Which one? Neither knew.
It turns out, both were on the same Page.

Handy Limerick

Tuesday, October 12th, 2021

At the piano the man’s an old hand;
He is one of the best in the land.
But he still has regrets
And never forgets:
Having more than one hand would be grand.

Why I Write Limericks (Limerick)

Saturday, October 9th, 2021

Writing lim’ricks meets some of my needs:
To create, vent my spleen, avoid screeds.
Written wordplay’s a ball!
And the best part of all?
It doesn’t entail making reeds.

Sketchy Artist (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 6th, 2021

A sketch artist’s drawings were raw
And flawed, rarely gazed at with awe.
Yet he won an award
For his “Gourd With A Sword.”
Fellow artists swore: “Luck of the Draw!”

Nailed It (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 5th, 2021

I called a new carpenter, Ned,
Cuz the first guy screwed up and then fled.
When I showed him the job
Ned said, “Fix it? No prob!”
Then he hit the nail right on the head.

Dither And Yawn? (Limerick)

Thursday, September 30th, 2021

When someone mentioned the word “dither” in a word-related Facebook group I belong to, I couldn’t resist the challenge of using it in a limerick:

Indecision is dicey. Don’t dither,
Or you’ll wither while plucking that zither.
Don’t quiver and quaver!
Be brave! Never waver,
Or risk running hither and thither.

Exceedingly Silly Limerick

Monday, September 27th, 2021

A fellow I know can’t spell “sneeze;”
Also “breezes” and “freezes” and “cheese.”
Though he always tries hard,
His spelling is marred;
Triple “e’s” make the man ill at ease.

Fishing For An Alibi (Limerick)

Saturday, September 25th, 2021

“It’s easy to hoodwink that stinker,”
Said a man of his wife, a big drinker.
“When coition’s my mission,
She thinks I’m out fishin’…
And falls for it hook, line, and sinker.”

Know-It-All Limerick

Wednesday, September 8th, 2021

“I’ve proven you’re wrong! Now eat crow,”
Said a know-it-all fellow, named Joe,
Who could not help but howl
At the answer re fowl:
“I’m allergic to poultry, so NO!”

Fun With Language (2-Verse Limerick)

Saturday, September 5th, 2015

Fun With Language (2-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Is there any original pun?
Is there wordplay that’s never been done?
With our language so strange
There’s unlimited range
To be playful, inventive, have fun.

We are homophone/homonym rich.
(Though ad hominem hits make me twitch.)
And later or sooner
The likes of Rev Spooner
Bewitch with the swull of a pitch.

Distaff Limerick

Sunday, March 29th, 2015

Distaff Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If “distaff’s” a word you forget,
You needn’t search books or the net.
It’s a not-so-nice mention
Of gals. Comprehension
Is easy. Think “dissed half.” All set?

Limerick Dry Run (The Evolution of a Limerick)

Thursday, November 14th, 2013

When I’m looking for limerick ideas, I sometimes visit idiom list sites, like this one. Then I’ll select an idiom that might work meter-wise and that ends with a common rhyme sound.

And so today, I challenged myself to write a limerick that contains the phrase “dry run.” Unconsciously inspired, perhaps, by the inept roll-out of Obamacare, I wrote these two lines:

A software firm held a dry run
But the coding, alas, wasn’t done…

I swiftly thought up an acceptable “B-rhyme,” but then got stuck at line 5. The best I could come up with was an ending that employed yet another idiom: “under the gun.” But I still couldn’t think of a line 5 that was even slightly clever.

And then I got an idea: create some wordplay by revising another line, adding specificity to the subject matter. Here’s the result:

Limerick Dry Run
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A software firm held a dry run,
But the arms-tracking code wasn’t done.
It failed test after test,
Till the owner confessed:
“I’m too stressed to work under the gun.”

Nigh Not Nearly My Forte

Saturday, April 9th, 2011

Today I have a bit of fun with two pairs of synonyms:

The words nigh and near
synonyms, and yet just one
sizzles and sings.

Near merely describes,
while the soaring nigh evokes —
close but no cigar.

But don’t pity near
it verbs — something nigh can’t do.
This verse now burned out.

*****

Metier, I hear,
is a forte synonym.
What a grand duo —
one traded for the other —
pianometier music.

*****

(Pompted by nigh from Haiku Heights and Weekend Theme’s metier.)