Posts Tagged ‘Musical Instruments’

Two Limericks For Uncommon Musical Instrument Awareness Day

Wednesday, July 31st, 2019

Since July 31st is “Uncommon Musical Instrument Awareness Day,” here’s a pair of limericks about archaic instruments:

A foolish, though musical fellow
Played bassoon, oboe, sax — even cello.
But auditions were few.
Competition? A slew!
So he learned the passé bassanello.

*****

A harpist was playing her chrotta
At a sporting event — a regatta.
She performed rather well,
But the gig went to hell
When a harpy (non-fan) threw frittata.

Nigh Not Nearly My Forte

Saturday, April 9th, 2011

Today I have a bit of fun with two pairs of synonyms:

The words nigh and near
synonyms, and yet just one
sizzles and sings.

Near merely describes,
while the soaring nigh evokes —
close but no cigar.

But don’t pity near
it verbs — something nigh can’t do.
This verse now burned out.

*****

Metier, I hear,
is a forte synonym.
What a grand duo —
one traded for the other —
pianometier music.

*****

(Pompted by nigh from Haiku Heights and Weekend Theme’s metier.)

Vive Vuvuzelas? Please, No!

Wednesday, June 16th, 2010

I’m not exactly a sports aficionado. But I’m guessing it’s safe to presume that most games are expected to be noisy.

Apparently, though, South African soccer fans take such noise to a new ear-piercing level, enthusiastically blowing vuvuzelas in the stadiums. What’s a vuvuzela? Well, I know from oboes, but not from vuvuzelas. However, I’ve just learned they’re cacophonous, droning, deafening horns (blown like a brass instrument) that are driving TV World Cup viewers insane.

Vive Vuvuzelas? Please, No! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Attempting to watch World Cup soccer?
Then you’re likely to go off your rocker:
Vuvuzelas abound
With their loud, droning sound.
They are deafening. Help! Need a blocker!

Brassy Limerick

Thursday, May 20th, 2010

I hope you’ll join me in writing a limerick with this first line:

A brassy old woman named Joan…

Here’s the limerick I wrote with that line. (It’s a three-verser, but a standard one-verse limerick is fine, of course.)

Brassy Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A brassy old woman named Joan
Loves the trumpet, but hates the trombone.
When people ask why
She says, “Married a guy
Who played bone with a terrible tone.”

She continues, “He made my head ache,
And he played it all night, for God’s sake.
I divorced him on grounds
Of cacophonic sounds.
Then I wed a French horn-playing rake.”

“He cheated on me day and night.
So I fin’ly said, go fly a kite!
Now I’m single again
And I’ll never date men
Who play brass, cuz those guys ain’t polite.”

Please feel free to write your own limerick using the same first line and post it in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity in my Limerick-Offs.

Musical Duo

Monday, October 15th, 2007

This pair of short, music-related verse was loosely inspired by this week’s Totally Optional Prompt.

Musical Question
By Madeleine Begun Kane
 
I watch a flautist play the flute.
She’s really great—there’s no dispute.
Distraction strikes: I know it’s moot,
But why don’t lautists play the lute?

Second Chair Blues (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“I play second chair symphony flute,”
Said the flautist. (“My wife plays the lute.”)
“How I wish I had clout!
Then I’d fire the lout
Who plays first chair. He’s here cause he’s cute.”

(You can find more of my song parodies here.)

Give Me An “A!” (Limerick)

Saturday, November 25th, 2006

Give Me An “A!”
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When symphony instruments tune,
They’re not matching the flute or bassoon;
It’s the first oboe’s “A”
That the strings must obey.
If they don’t, be prepared for High Noon.

On a more serious … uh … note, here’s some info that might make this limerick a bit more meaningful to some of you: Symphony orchestras tune to the first oboist, who generally gives his fellow musicians an A-440. Many string players prefer a slightly sharper pitch, an A-442 or A-444, believing that it gives their sound a more desirable brightness. This can lead to lots of bickering.

You can find more of my music related humor here.