Posts Tagged ‘Donald Trump’

Distractions (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 16th, 2024

I attempt to write lim’ricks each day.
But at times my damn mind won’t obey:
For my latest lim-slump
I blame tax forms and Trump.
Both distract me and WON’T GO AWAY!

My Adventures with AI Bots Bard and ChatGPT

Wednesday, April 19th, 2023

Yesterday, I had a rather disturbing experience while playing with one of the sundry AI bots. It confirmed a concern I had the minute I started hearing about all those sundry technological “marvels.”

Google’s BARD, recently featured on 60 Minutes, was the one I was experimenting with yesterday. (I’d previously spent a little bit of time with ChatGPT and found (much to my relief) that it was terrible at creating limericks.

Anyway, yesterday I asked BARD to “write a limerick in the style of Edward Lear.” Almost immediately, it responded with an excellent and very famous limerick generally attributed to this fellow: Arthur Henry Reginald Buller.

Here’s the limerick, which many of you are likely to recognize:

“There once was a lady named Bright,
Whose speed was far faster than light;
She set out one day
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.”

(The bot did NOT credit any author.)

I gave this response a negative review and, when asked why, I explained that the limerick was completely plagiarized.

I then asked BARD to write a limerick about Donald Trump, wondering if it would steal another limerick. Instead, it responded “I’m a text-based AI and can’t assist with that.”

Finally, I asked BARD for a limerick about the weather. It churned out three limericks that were lousy, but not nearly as bad as the ones produced by CHATGPT. In both cases, a quick Google search didn’t yield any evidence of theft. On the other hand, if they were stolen, they were stolen from very bad and (hopefully) obscure limerick writers.

UPDATE: A friend suggested I try the same query again, but add the word “original.” So just now I posted this request to BARD: “Write an original limerick in the style of Edward Lear.” Alas, it churned out the same famous limerick that it “wrote” yesterday. So not only did the word “original” make no difference, but the bot failed to learn from yesterday’s negative comment.

Limerick Ode To 2021

Wednesday, December 30th, 2020

Here’s hoping your new year is great!
(2020 sure sucked — no debate.)
If the new vaccines work,
And Mitch ISN’T a jerk,
We just might have a year we don’t hate.

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: SIGHT or SITE at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: August 29, 2020)

Saturday, August 15th, 2020

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using SIGHT or SITE at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to CHILDREN, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best CHILDREN-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on August 30, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, August 29, 2020 at 4:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my SIGHT/SITE-rhyme limerick:

Though I hate to appear impolite,
Or petty and quick to indict,
Trump’s a blight on our nation;
A Trump relocation
To prison would be a fine sight.

And here’s my CHILDREN-themed limerick:

We adopted a pet at the pound;
An adorable, cuddly young hound.
The children both love her,
But run off for cover
When doggie-doo mishaps are found.

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: BACK or ABACK at the end of any one line (Submission Deadline: March 14, 2020)

Saturday, February 29th, 2020

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using BACK or ABACK at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to TOYS, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best TOY-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on March 15, 2020, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, March 14, 2020 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my BACK/ABACK-rhyme limerick:

I’m confused and bewildered, alack,
Cuz I can’t decide which pol to back.
Ousting Trump is a must!
But whom can we trust
To keep Donald’s eviction on track?

And here’s my TOY-themed limerick:

Whenever I hear lots of noise,
I suspect that it’s men and their toys:
A new tool, scooter, car,
Or (Oy Vey!) a GUITAR!
Loud? Annoying? It’s catnip to boys!

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick-Off Monday – Rhyme Word: YOKE or YOLK at the end of any one line

Sunday, July 22nd, 2018

It’s Limerick-Off time, once again. And that means I write a limerick, and you write your own, using the same rhyme word. Then you post your limerick(s) as a comment to this post and, if you’re a Facebook user, on Facebook too.

I hope you’ll join me in writing limericks using YOKE or YOLK at the end of any one line. (Homonyms or homophones are fine.)

The best submission will be crowned Limerick-Off Award Winner. (Here’s last week’s Limerick-Off Award Winner.)

Additionally, you may write themed limericks related to SPAM, using any rhyme word. And of course I’ll present an extra award — one for the best SPAM-related limerick.

How will your poems be judged? By meter, rhyme, cleverness, and humor. (If you’re feeling a bit fuzzy about limerick writing rules, here’s my How To Write A Limerick article.)

I’ll announce the winners on August 5, 2018, right before I post the next Limerick-Off. So that gives you two full weeks to submit your clever, polished verse. Your submission deadline is Saturday, August 4, 2018 at 10:00 p.m. (Eastern Time.)

Here’s my limerick:

Our nation is under the yoke
Of a demon named Donald — no joke!
As his party-mates cower,
His chokehold on power
Increases, his base still “unwoke.”

Please feel free to enter my Limerick-Off by posting your limerick(s) in my comments. And if you’re on Facebook, I hope you’ll join my friends in that same activity on my Facebook Limerick-Off post.

To receive an email alert whenever I post a new Limerick-Off, please email Madkane@MadKane.com Subject: MadKane’s Newsletter. Thanks!

Limerick Ode To Canada Day

Friday, July 1st, 2016

It’s Canada Day, so congrats.
You Canucks surely think that we’re bats.
And I have to concede
That you’re right. If I need
To flee Trump, do you have any flats?

Tweeting The Unconventional (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 4th, 2016

Biz advice from a mogul, by tweet:
Women eyeing that large corner suite
Should hike skirts up and wear
Bright colors. I swear
It ain’t Trump, but Barb Corc’ran. Delete!

Here’s the article that inspired this limerick: “Barbara Corcoran to female entrepreneurs: Hike up your skirts.”

Yet Another Donald Trump Limerick

Wednesday, July 1st, 2015

Yet Another Donald Trump Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Donald’s a pain in the rump.
Just seeing his name makes me jump
And turn grumpy and peeved,
So I’m rather relieved:
Macy’s dumping the “fashion” line “Trump.”

(More Donald Trump humor here.)

Reality TV Shows That Will Never Be Produced

Thursday, November 14th, 2013

In a recent Washington Post Style Invitational contest (Week 1043), we were challenged to invent fake celebrity reality shows. I enjoyed many of the winning entries, especially several of the Honorable Mentions. So be sure to click that link and read about those never-to-be shows.

Alas, no ink for me this week. But here are my three non-winning entries:

“Dancing Behind Bars.” Former “Dancing with the Stars” judge Bruno Tonioli launches his quest for “fast on their feet felons,” after running out of minimally talented dancers in the general population. “Inmates have so much talent, it’s criminal,” raves Bruno. “The cat burglars have stolen my heart! And those death row moves are killer!”

“The Sex Factor.” After losing control of the Miss USA and Miss Universe franchises in yet another bankruptcy, Donald Trump makes a comeback with a weekly beauty contest that, according to Trump, will be “really big” with “lots of bikinis and no interviews.” Says Trump, “girls should be seen and not heard … unless they went to Wharton.”

“Dancing Up In Mars” marks a “new frontier in reality TV, taking dance competitions to the next step.” Says host Newt Gingrich, “the gravity difference presents a grave challenge. But on the upside, Mars doesn’t enforce alimony laws. So no more checks to my six (or is it seven?) exes.”

Some Dishy Verse

Thursday, September 13th, 2007

Some Dishy Verse
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“We’re discussing our favorite dish,”
Said the gal. “Please chime in if you wish.”
“You mean Paris and Trump
And that singer’s big rump?”
“Oh my no, sir! Our topic is fish.”

(You can find more of my food and drink limericks and humor here and my Donald Trump humor here.)

O’Donnell v. The Donald

Tuesday, January 9th, 2007

Have you heard about the Rosie O’Donnell vs. Donald Trump feud? Yeah … like you could possibly avoid it. Those publicity-mongers deserve a limerick, don’t you think? 

Rosie O’Donnell vs. The Donald
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Whenever publicity’s needed,
O’Donnell and Trump seem to feed it
By starting a feud
With each other. How rude!
To both I can only say, “Beat it!”