Archive for the ‘Donald Trump’ Category

Callous Kirstjen Nielsen (Limerick)

Saturday, December 15th, 2018

Headline: “DHS Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen Blames Migrant Girl’s Death in Border Patrol Custody on Her Family”

Kirstjen Nielsen is callous and mean;
Her response to this death was obscene.
A young migrant girl dies?
Human decency’s wise!
But on blaming the parents, she’s keen.

Good Riddance To Ryan Zinke (Limerick)

Saturday, December 15th, 2018

Headline: “Ryan Zinke, Into the Sunset
The Secretary of the Interior departs under a cascade of ethics investigations.”

Ryan Zinke is leaving. No loss!
He is nearly as bad as his boss.
His departure is hailed.
He deserves to be jailed,
So buh-bye to that heel and his hoss.

Trump Can Forget the “Edwards Defense” (Limerick)

Friday, December 14th, 2018

Trump’s hush money payments to gals
Is NOT a big deal, say his pals.
Trump can use the defense
That Edwards used; hence
Donald wins. (That’s their flawed rationales.)

But the “shield-wife defense” won’t apply
To Donald Trump’s pay-offs. Here’s why:
Those who made them concede
That their goal was impede
An election loss. Donald — Buh-Bye!

A 2-Mike Limerick

Friday, December 14th, 2018

I am betting Pence ain’t in the clear;
He ran the transition, I fear,
And he knew what Mike Flynn
Was up to. I’ll grin
At a Mike Pence arrest. How I’ll cheer!

Kevin McCarthy’s Quite The Kidder! (Limerick)

Friday, December 14th, 2018

Headline: “McCarthy calls on incoming Democrats to embrace bipartisanship, not ‘food fight’ or investigations”

Kev McCarthy, of Party-First rule,
Must believe ev’ry Dem is a fool.
Now that Dems run the House,
That hypocrite louse
Touts bipartisanship. What a tool!

Poor Donnie Feels Harassed (Limerick)

Thursday, December 13th, 2018

Trump had the audacity to threaten the Democrats: He “warned he would not work with Democrats if they continue to support the special counsel investigation and are ‘going to do presidential harassment.’”

Donald’s warnings to Dems are confusing;
Also foolish, bizarre, and amusing:
“Presidential harassment”
Must stop! If the Ass meant
To scare us, he must have been boozing.

Limerick Ode To Nancy Pelosi

Thursday, December 13th, 2018

Pelosi’s a powerful lass;
I loved how she kicked Donald’s ass.
Then she stomped the insurgents
And conquered deter-gents.
That woman has skills, smarts, and brass.

Melania’s Poll Numbers Drop (Whomp, Whomp!) Limerick

Thursday, December 13th, 2018

Headline: “Melania Trump’s poll numbers plummet

Melania’s permanent frown
May worsen; her ratings are down.
But she STILL is liked more
Than the man we abhor…
Who pretends his bare head bears a crown.

Limerick Ode To Our Goading Victim In Chief

Wednesday, December 12th, 2018

Some claim Donald was goaded by Chuck
Into owning the shutdown. Good luck
With excuses as lame
As THAT. Who’s to blame
For this misstep? It’s President Schmuck.

Trump’s Shutdown (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 12th, 2018

Headline: “Trump: ‘I’m proud to shut down the government’ over border wall”

Over border wall funding, Trump’s “proud
To shut down the government.” Loud
And clear was his statement,
Precluding debatement.
Piggish Donald shall reap what he’s sow’d.

Peanut-Brained Trump (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 11th, 2018

Headline: “President Trump claims he’s ‘not concerned’ about impeachment, calls his campaign’s Russia ties ‘peanut stuff’

While speaking with Reuters, Trump strains
To minimize all his campaign’s
Russia contacts, declaring
It’s “peanut stuff,” baring
His hubris and shortage of brains.

Trump’s Chief Of Staff Blues (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 11th, 2018

No one wants to be Trump’s Chief Of Staff.
A career booster? Don’t make me laugh!
You’d have to be high
To work for that guy.
So he’s down to the riff and the raff.

***********
With Apologies to Andrew Lloyd Webber:

Don’t cry for Trump; he’s a felon.
The fact is, he’s never truthful.
All through his wild days, his mad existence,
He kept no promise,
So keep your distance.
**************

The Beauty Of A Butina Deal (Limerick)

Monday, December 10th, 2018

Headline: “Accused Russian spy Maria Butina appears poised to plead guilty”

Donald Trump should be tied up in knots,
Cuz Maria Butina knows lots,
And it looks like she’ll squeal;
She has just made a deal.
Oy gevalt! Trump may actually plotz.

“Smocking Gun” Mockery (Limerick)

Monday, December 10th, 2018

From a Trump tweet today: “No Smocking Gun…No Collusion.”

Donald tweets about guns that ain’t “smocking,”
Which occasions a whole lot of mocking.
Poor Trump’s in a bind,
For soon he will find
Much bad news and “clean” coal in his stocking.

Mueller’s Got Him! (Limerick)

Saturday, December 8th, 2018

Headline: “Mueller Is Telling Us: He’s Got Trump on Collusion

Robert Mueller’s got Trump on collusion.
Is there evidence? Yes, a profusion!
Mueller’s caught him red-handed.
Trump’s never been candid;
With Russians he banded. (Conclusion)

The GOP’s Silence Is Deafening (Limerick)

Saturday, December 8th, 2018

From Pulitzer Prize-nominated journalist Victoria Brownworth: “It’s extraordinary that the GOP leadership has said not one word about the events of the last 24 hrs. A sitting US president has been named as a felon. A felon. And they are silent.”

Now that Donald has clearly been named
As a criminal, who could be blamed
For wondering when
Republican men
Will acknowledge their party’s been shamed?

John Kelly Bites The Dust

Saturday, December 8th, 2018

John Kelly is out. I won’t miss him.
If you read me, you know that I diss him.
He was greeted with hope
That he’d clean up the dope
In the Oval. But no! So let’s hiss him.

Donald’s High Anxiety (Limerick)

Friday, December 7th, 2018

The Donald seems anxious today;
His tweets appear frantic. They bray
About Mueller in ways
That suggests a deep craze…
As the hunter locks on to his prey.

Sentencing Memo Mania

Thursday, December 6th, 2018

“Tomorrow is going to be a big day. Both Manafort and Cohen’s sentencing memorandums will be released by the Mueller team.”

More sentencing memos tomorrow!
I’m glad, but will suffer great sorrow,
If they’re filled with redactions;
Need facts, not subtractions!
Else I’ll cry and need tissues to borrow.

Trump Runs Away From Pence? (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 5th, 2018

Headline: “Trump’s Team Considers Removing Mike Pence from 2020 Ticket”

Will the Donald give Mike Pence the boot?
That’s the re-elect rumor. Each coot
Deserves only the worst.
Yes for vengeance, I thirst,
And I’m hoping this question is moot.