Archive for the ‘Donald Trump’ Category

Trumped Up Campaign (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 14th, 2014

Here we go again! It’s too early to pretend to run for U.S. President. So instead, Donald Trump is fake-running for Governor of New York State.

Trumped Up Campaign (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

This brainchild (I trust) won’t get far:
New York Governor Trump — TV star.
He might run, Donald claims,
But we know his true aim’s
To get press for his show … or be czar.

Trumped Up Lawsuit (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 5th, 2013

You don’t have to be a “recovering lawyer” like me to know that such a lawsuit would be frivolous:

During a guest appearance on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno last month, Maher quipped that Trump must be “the spawn of his mother having sex with an orangutan” (Exhibit A: his orange hair). In a riff off of Trump’s own offer to give $5 million to the charity of Barack Obama’s choice if the President released his college paperwork, Maher said he would do the same for Trump if the real estate mogul supplied proof that he is not descended from an ape.

Trump, who apparently was able to prove he wasn’t fathered by an orangutan, has announced on Fox & Friends that he’s suing for the $5 million.

Trumped Up Lawsuit (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A man who I’d rather not mention
Is relentlessly seeking attention:
With his Birther schtick stale,
He is desp’rate to nail
Lots of cov’rage through lawsuit dissension.

Romney Owns His Surrogates’ Racism (Limerick)

Friday, October 26th, 2012

Mitt Romney’s campaign co-chair John Sununu has a long history of making racist comments and being forced to (sort of) walk them back. His attributing Colin Powell’s endorsement of Obama to their both being black, is only Sununu’s latest race-baiting remark.

And yet Sununu (and others with a similar history) remain valued Romney surrogates. (Don’t kid yourself — there’s racism behind Donald Trump’s Birther garbage and his Obama college transcript crapola.)

So here’s a good question posed by John Presta: Isn’t it time for John Sununu, Mitt Romney’s racist surrogate, to step aside?

Romney Owns His Surrogates’ Racism (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Romney’s allies quite frequently base
Their attacks on Obama on race.
Of this fact, Mitt’s aware—
Seems he just doesn’t care.
Mitt’s campaign’s racist face — a disgrace!

Update: Col. Lawrence Wilkerson, Colin Powell’s chief of staff during his time as Secretary of State criticized the racism of his (Republican) party:

Let me just be candid: My party is full of racists. And the real reason a considerable portion of my party wants President Obama out of the White House has nothing to do with the content of his character, nothing to do with his competence as commander-in-chief and president, and everything to do with the color of his skin. And that’s despicable.

Limerick Ode To Publicity Whores

Wednesday, October 24th, 2012

I try so hard to ignore publicity whores, like Donald Trump and Ann Coulter. And yet, their obnoxious antics make me look … and limerick.

Oh, why I can’t disregard stuff like this Coulter tweet:

…Coulter sent a Twitter message during the presidential debates Monday saying [she] approved of “(Mitt) Romney’s decision to be kind and gentle to the retard,” referring to Obama.

And while I’m at it, I’d love to tune out Donald Trump’s nonsensical “bombshell:”

Donald Trump said on Wednesday that if President Obama releases his college records and his passport application, the mega-millionaire developer will give a $5 million check to charities of Obama’s choosing.

Limerick Ode To Publicity Whores
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Trump and Coulter, two bores I abhor,
And I promise myself to ignore.
But alas, my resistance
Is down. Their persistence
In boorishness strikes at my core.

Romney and the Blowhard (Limerick)

Friday, June 1st, 2012

This Donald Trump quote sounds fictitious, but it’s real: “I have a very large Twitter.”

Romney and the Blowhard (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Trump is proud of his “very large Twitter.”
(That’s a quote — not a Mad B Kane titter.)
When The Donald ain’t ragging
The prez, then he’s bragging.
Donald Trump — he’s where Mitt turns for glitter.

An Open Limerick To Mitt Romney

Thursday, May 31st, 2012

Birtherism is but one of Donald Trump’s bad qualities. And yet the Mitt Romney-Donald Trump alliance is going strong, making some people wonder how Romney looks at himself in the mirror without throwing up.

An Open Limerick To Mitt Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Mitt, some are feeling concerned,
Cuz what little respect you have earned,
Will go right down the drain
Should you really retain
Your Trump clown-act. He needs to be spurned.

The Limerick Romney Wanted To Send Trump

Monday, February 6th, 2012

This headline is funny, but not surprising: Donald Trump Takes Credit For Mitt Romney’s Big Win In Nevada:

“There was a lot riding on that particular race in Nevada and it was interesting, because the numbers were much, much greater than you thought,” Trump gloated. “And a lot of people are giving me credit for that. And I will accept that credit.”

Here’s the limerick that Romney staffers talked Mitt out of sending:

The Limerick Romney Wanted To Send Trump
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Donald, big thanks for your backing,
But I fear that your modesty’s lacking.
My win in Nevada
Was ME. You did NADA!
I regret I did not send you packing.

Trump Endorses Romney — Election Over (Limerick)

Thursday, February 2nd, 2012

Will Trump endorse Newt? Will The Donald go with Mitt? Will Donald Trump fire himself from The Apprentice so he can run for president as a third-party candidate?

At long last, all that heady speculation has ended.

Trump Endorses Romney – Election Over (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Donald Trump had been sending up flares.
His endorsement speech finally airs:
Despite all that’s been writ,
He is going with Mitt.
I have only one question: Who cares?

Limerick Ode To The Immoderate Donald Trump

Wednesday, December 7th, 2011

A Trump-moderated Republican debate? Even Karl Rove says it’s a terrible idea.

Damn! Me — agreeing with Karl Rove. That’s seriously scary!

Meanwhile, Mitt Romney did the classy thing, for once, adding his name to the list of candidates who’ve declined the Trump Debate Invite. So far, Ron Paul, Jon Huntsman, and Romney have declined to participate, while Newt Gingrich and Rick Santorum have accepted.

Limerick Ode To The Immoderate Donald Trump
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Debate moderation’s an art,
And practitioners need to be smart,
Diplomatic, well versed—
In the topic immersed.
Donald Trump? Not just bad. Off the chart!

UPDATE: Republican National Committee Chairman Reince Priebus has come out against the Donald Trump debate, citing as his reason Trump’s ongoing flirtation with an independent run for president. Additionally Perry has now declined his debate invitation.

Wooing The Donald (Limerick)

Monday, September 26th, 2011

Just when you thought they couldn’t stoop any lower, Republican presidential wannabes like Mitt Romney, Rick Perry, Sarah Palin, and Michele Bachmann are lining up to kiss Donald Trump’s … uh … ring. After all, nothing says presidential like a Donald Trump endorsement.

Wooing The Donald (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Some Republicans hope for a bump
In their polls if endorsed by Don Trump.
Here’s a warning for those
Who are kissing his toes:
Self-promotion’s “Goal 1″ for that grump.

Donald Trump Outsmarts Himself

Tuesday, April 26th, 2011

People tend to assume that Trump owns all the stuff his name is emblazoned on. However, he isn’t nearly as wealthy as he’d have us believe. But he still has his good name. Or does he?

Donald Trump Outsmarts Himself
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Trump is playing a dangerous game:
His most noteworthy asset’s his name.
He gains media drama
With lies re Obama,
But devalues what’s left of his fame.

Open Limerick To Birthers

Friday, April 22nd, 2011

Hey Birthers, in between mouthing off about Obama and demanding the already-furnished proof that Obama was born in the U.S., I have a fun new assignment for you: How about ranting about Mitt Romney and demanding Romney’s elusive certificate of live birth?

What’s the matter Donald “Birther” Trump? Can’t you afford any more investigators?

Open Limerick To Birthers
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Certifiable birth record pests
Keep beating their paranoid chests.
Yet they don’t have a fit
Over Romney, yes Mitt —
Where’s their int’rest in Mitt-record quests?

Author’s Note: For the record (and for the sarcasm-challenged) I’m confident that both Obama and Romney were born in the United States.

(You can find born-related haiku here.)

Limerick Ode To Donald Birther Trump

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

Limerick Ode To Donald Birther Trump
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I once met a man, Donald Trump,
In my lawyering days — what a lump!
This was long, long ago —
Way before his big show.
He’s no brighter while out on the stump.

Author’s Note: Yes, I really did encounter Donald Trump decades ago, early in my legal career. And no, I don’t really believe Trump will run for U.S. president. But he’s certainly on the stump … for publicity. And if you want to read about Trump’s increasingly malevolent dive into Birther-politics here’s the latest from Political Wire.