Archive for the ‘Bill Clinton’ Category

Jonah Goldberg’s Dust Cover Dustup (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 9th, 2012

Remember Jonah Goldberg? The fellow whose pundit career got a huge boost from his mommy Lucianne Goldberg’s role in the Bill Clinton impeachment.

Well, he’s out with a new liberal-bashing book. I wouldn’t even mention it, but for the amusing dustup over its dust cover:

On the dust jacket of his new book, “The Tyranny of Clichés: How Liberals Cheat in the War of Ideas,” best-selling conservative author and commentator Jonah Goldberg is described as having “twice been nominated for a Pulitzer Prize.”

In fact, as Goldberg acknowledged on Tuesday, he has never been a Pulitzer nominee, but is merely one of thousands of entrants.

What’s surprising in Goldberg’s case is that he has been called out for the same résumé padding before, when his previous book was published.

Jonah Goldberg’s Dust Cover Dustup (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Jonah Goldberg has written a book
Claiming liberals cheat, as its hook.
Check its dust jacket. Why?
To laugh at this lie:
Nominee for two Pulitzers? Schnook!

Buh-Bye Dan Burton (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 31st, 2012

Bill Clinton nemesis Dan Burton is finally retiring. Good riddance!

The Republican Indiana Congressman, who fathered an out-of-wedlock son, was famed for his anti-Bill Clinton vendetta, his Vincent-Foster-was- murdered obsession, and his backyard Foster-shooting “re-enactment.”

Burton was at his most famous in the 1990’s, when he led many of the investigations against President Bill Clinton. “If I could prove 10 percent of what I believe happened, he’d [Clinton] be gone,” Burton declared in 1998. “This guy’s a scumbag. That’s why I’m after him.”

His campaigns against Clinton began in full force when he delivered a House speech in which he alleged that Deputy White House Counsel Vince Foster, whose death was ruled a suicide, was actually murdered and his body moved to Fort Marcy Park in northern Virginia.

Buh-Bye Dan Burton (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

At long last, we are closing the curtain
On the slanderous reign of Dan Burton.
His witch-hunt campaigns
To put Clinton in chains
Mean that Dems shall not miss him — that’s certain!

What Would The Press Do Without Clinton Rumors?

Thursday, November 20th, 2008

Hillary wants to be Obama’s Secretary of State. Hillary doesn’t know if she wants to be Secretary of State. Bill’s standing in her way. Bill’s fully cooperating. Obama’s made an offer. Obama hasn’t made an offer. The blogs think it’s a terrible idea. The blogs think it’s a great idea.

Just one question: Does anyone else think all this rumor-mongering is a wee bit silly?

What Would The Press Do Without Clinton Rumors? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The press is so desp’rate for drama
In a White House that’s run by Obama,
That they eagerly tell
Bill and Hill tales pell-mell.
No Clintons? They’d run home to mama.

Those Were The Days, My Friend

Sunday, April 20th, 2008

Remember when the entire left blogosphere could be counted on to criticize politicians who said one thing and did the opposite? And when hypocrisy was routinely deconstructed and attacked by the left?

I’m talking about the pre-Obama-cult days, of course.  A time when the sort of behavior described here, here, here and here wouldn’t have been countenanced (let alone encouraged) by half the left blogosphere. Those were the days, my friend. (McCain Trademark Pending)

And that brings me to the first of my latest pair of limericks:

Dear Obama, please tell us all why
You keep doing the stuff you decry.
Cuz the “high road” you claim
Sure is littered with shame,
As you peddle your DC change lie.

My second new limerick was inspired by Obama’s slick habit of conflating the GWB and Bill Clinton presidencies by referring to decades in discussing this nation’s problems.  Instead of pinpointing the horrendous Bush years, Obama blithely tarnishes the Democratic brand with that plural decades reference.  

Why does he do this? Apparently it’s Obama who will do whatever it takes to win.  And that includes making sure Hillary doesn’t get credit by association for the relatively prosperous and peaceful Nineties.

That brings me to today’s second limerick:

Obama cites “decades” of ills,
Conflating the Bush years with Bill’s.
He’ll hurt the Dem brand
By playing that hand,
Leading voters to run for the hills.[tags]Barack Obama Hypocrisy, Democratic Brand, Left Blogosphere, Presidential Election Humor, Campaign Satire[/tags]

The Buck Stops … On Clinton? (Updated)

Wednesday, October 11th, 2006

Bush is still rejecting the idea of bilateral talks with North Korea, claiming that they failed to work during Bill Clinton’s administration. Meanwhile, Bush’s flame throwing surrogate, John McCain, says North Korea’s nuclear test, conducted nearly six years into Dubya’s presidency, is Bill Clinton’s fault.  So, does that mean Monica was Bush Sr.’s fault?

And that brings me to my latest haiku:

The Buck Stops … On Clinton? (Haiku)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

North Korea’s nukes
Are Clinton’s fault, claims McCain.
Bill’s still Prez?  Who knew?

Update: Right after John “Straight Talk” McCain’s finger pointing, McCain blasted people for North Korea related finger pointing. [tags]Bilateral Talks, Nuclear Tests, Nuclear Technology, Senator McCain, President Clinton, North Korea Sanctions[/tags]