Archive for the ‘Hypocrisy Humor’ Category

Hypocritical Pence (Limerick)

Wednesday, August 8th, 2018

Mike Pence’s hypocrisy cries out for a limerick:

Vice President Mike Pence once argued the president of the United States should be held to the highest moral standards to determine whether he should resign or be removed from office.”

Pence made the argument in two columns in the late 1990s, where he wrote that then-President Bill Clinton’s admission of an affair with a White House intern and prior lies to the public about the matter, possibly under oath, meant Clinton should be removed from office.

When Bill Clinton was Prez, Pence decried
And denounced Bill’s affairs. How he tried
To get Clinton expelled.
But such quibbles seem quelled;
He’s Trump’s VEEP now, so standards have died.

A Limerick Ode To GOP Hypocrisy

Saturday, May 5th, 2018

Just imagine the sturm and the drama,
If a Dem such as Ex-Prez Obama
Retained someone to fix
All his problems with chicks.
How the GOP’d feast on such trauma!

But with Donald, who cares? No big deal!
From supporters there’s hardly a squeal.
Sleaze and lies do not matter;
No Trump-crime can shatter
Their faith, for the Donald’s THEIR heel.

Pro-Life??? (Limerick)

Sunday, February 25th, 2018

Viewing DACA, Head Start, WIC with scorn,
Pushing guns, while their victims still mourn.
Cutting taxes is key!
The “pro-life” GOP
Is ONLY pro-life till you’re born.

Open Limerick To NRA Shills

Sunday, November 5th, 2017

Dear NRA shills, ev’ry prayer
And each thought that you send’s just hot air.
Let us know when you’ll draw
Up a gun control law.
Until then, stop pretending you care.

The Party Of Crocodile Tears (Limerick)

Monday, October 2nd, 2017

Enough with your “thoughts” and your “prayers,”
Dear GOP pols — no one cares!
All that just-pretend keening
Lacks value and meaning
When the keeners sell NRA wares.

Dear Alex Jones (Limerick)

Saturday, April 22nd, 2017

An Alex Jones request, apparently made without any sense of irony:

“Alex Jones releases statement on his ongoing custody trial: ‘I urge the press to be respectful and responsible.'”

Dear Alex, you threw us a curve
And proved you still have quite the nerve
In requesting respect.
Hope the press will elect
To bestow the respect you deserve.

Disclosure’s Just For Democrats? (Limerick)

Tuesday, April 18th, 2017

Donald’s taxes? Don’t bother to press.
Who arrives at the White House? Just guess.
The transparency-hawk
Who knocked Dems will just balk,
While he blithely discloses much less.

Transparency’s Only For Democrats? (Limerick)

Friday, April 14th, 2017

Donald’s trashed yet another tradition,
While expanding disclosure attrition.
He is hiding from view
White House logs of his queue
Of visitors. Stealth is his mission.

What’s A Few Lies Among GOP Friends? (Limerick)

Monday, December 5th, 2016

Add Paul Ryan to the long list of Republicans who are just fine with a GOP president who constantly lies:

“‘I have no way of backing that up,’ Paul Ryan says about President-elect Trump’s tweet claiming millions of Americans voted illegally. ‘It doesn’t matter to me. He won the election.’”

Ryan shrugs at Trump’s lies and tall tales.
For instance, when Trump falsely wails
That sham votes by the mil
Were counted for Hill,
Says Ryan: Trump won. All else pales!

Open Limerick To FBI Director James Comey

Tuesday, November 1st, 2016

There’s a stark double standard from Comey.
(If you don’t think I’m MAD, you don’t know me.)
He proclaims each Hill crumb,
Yet on Trump he stays mum.
So my message to Comey is “Blow me!”

Limerick Ode To Hypocrite Ammon Bundy

Wednesday, January 6th, 2016

Ammon Bundy, one of the leaders of the Oregon armed federal-building-takeover, is militantly against the federal government … except when he needs its help:

Ammon Bundy decries and bemoans
Fed’ral rights to the land the gov owns.
Yet he’s pleased to exploit
And extremely adroit
At fed-subsidized small bus’ness loans.

Here’s an excellent Mother Jones article about Ammon Bundy and his SBA loan.

Having It Both Ways (Limerick)

Monday, December 29th, 2014

Having It Both Ways (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Claim “Obama’s economy’s” sick?
Then take credit for upswings? How slick!
But my dear GOPers,
It doesn’t take seers
To know that you really must pick.

John Boehner’s Open Limerick To Obama

Friday, August 1st, 2014

John Boehner’s Open Limerick To Obama
By Madeleine Begun Kane

How dare you slow implementation
Of a law that is bad for our nation!
You’re impeding our rush
For a law that we’d flush.
Now show leadership! Fix immigration!

Weep For The Wealthy (Limerick)

Monday, April 7th, 2014

Weep For The Wealthy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though the wealthy will publicly cheer
As campaign regs get knocked on their rear,
Some privately groan:
“No limits?” they moan.
“Buying pols is becoming too dear!”

Note from Mad Kane: Although I concocted that quote, it may be closer to the truth than you think. Here’s The Weekly Standard’s Bill Kristol, who argued on ABC’s This Week “that not every wealthy donor will embrace the outcome of the McCutcheon case, because they may now be obliged to give more:”

“All the donors I know hate this decision, of course,” he said. “This used to be a very good excuse to say to a candidate, ooh, I’m maxing out, I just can’t help your campaign.”

Free Speech Gets Pricey (Limerick)

Thursday, April 3rd, 2014

Free Speech Gets Pricey (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Remember “one person, one vote?”
Now “one dollar, one vote’s” what they wrote;
Yes, the U.S. Supremes
Favor money — in reams,
As the rich grab free speech by the throat.

Thanks to the New Yorker’s John Cassidy, for inspiring this limerick with his acerbic comment about McCutcheon v. FEC:

But Wednesday’s decision, once again a five-to-four ruling, represented another significant step away from the antiquated principle of “one person, one vote” toward the more modern, and utilitarian, notion of “one dollar, one vote.”

Supreme Priorities (Limerick)

Wednesday, April 2nd, 2014

If you thought the Citizens United ruling undermined democracy, brace yourself: The Roberts court has made things even worse with yet another controversial 5-4 decision in McCutcheon v. FEC. Assaulting campaign finance reform once again, the Supreme Court struck down the aggregate limits on how much an individual can contribute to candidates, parties and political action committees.

As Ari Berman astutely observes:

The Court’s conservative majority believes that the First Amendment gives wealthy donors and powerful corporations the carte blanche right to buy an election but that the Fifteenth Amendment does not give Americans the right to vote free of racial discrimination.

Supreme Priorities
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Supremes freed the wealthy to buy
Politicians — an endless supply.
Seems “free speech” means “free spending,”
While “voting rights rending”
Isn’t something they care to decry.

Limerick Flashback

Wednesday, March 26th, 2014

Limerick Flashback
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The date to apply by is near.
Health care bennies soon lost, many fear.
So the Prez moves the date,
Which makes no one irate;
It was Bush, and ’06 was the year.

I Spy Hypocrisy (Limerick)

Thursday, March 13th, 2014

Some of the USA’s most ardent defenders of our ever-growing surveillance state (Lindsey Graham, Diane Feinstein, John McCain) are suddenly up in arms about domestic spying. Why? Cuz this time it’s PERSONAL!

For instance:

In response to accusations that the Central Intelligence Agency has snooped on Senate computers, Graham went bonkers, telling reporters on Tuesday that “Heads should roll, people should go to jail if it’s true.”

I Spy Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though Senators failed to condemn
Our rampant surveillance, or stem
All the government spying,
They’re suddenly crying,
Cuz the CIA’s spying on the THEM!

Ode To Wingnuttery

Tuesday, March 11th, 2014

Ode To Wingnuttery
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Obama is a “tyrant,”
wingnuts tell us ev’ry day.
But they also claim his “cowardice”
makes Putin go astray.

Seems Obama’s “too aggressive,
seizing power with his pen,”
when he isn’t just a “weakling.”
You bewildered yet? Amen!

Trafficking In Hypocrisy (Limerick)

Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio’s been catching some flack lately over his traffic-safety initiative. It seems he doesn’t practice what he preaches.

Trafficking In Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Bill de Blasio warns New York folk
To drive carefully. Safety’s no joke.
Yet the rules take a hike
In Bill’s auto. Did Mike
Ever guzzle a giant-sized Coke?

Note from Mad Kane: For those who don’t follow New York City politics, former Mayor Mike Bloomberg (whom de Blasio criticizes at every opportunity) is famous/infamous for banning super-sized sodas.