Headline: “McCarthy Blames Loss of House on ‘Historical Trends’”
Don’t expect any rueful admissions
To explain the Dem’s House seat additions.
No the GOP bends
The truth, blaming trends;
Not its actions and dreadful positions.
Posts Tagged ‘House Republicans’
The GOP Draws The Wrong Conclusions (Limerick)
Thursday, November 15th, 2018Limerick Ode To Republican Chris Collins
Wednesday, August 8th, 2018Headline: “New York Republican Rep. Chris Collins indicted on insider trading charges”
Chris Collins is under arrest
For fraud and false statements. Obsessed
With great greed, Chris misleads,
Commits crimes and misdeeds,
As he does what his party does best.
Trump’s Empty Threats (Limerick)
Thursday, March 30th, 2017This tweet from Alex Burns (New York Times & CNN) inspired a limerick. How? It made me realize that Trump’s anti-Freedom Caucus rants may actually help its members:
“Please, sir, don’t massively elevate us as the scourge of the mainline Republican Party.” Does anyone hear the Freedom Caucus saying this?
While it’s true that Trump clearly outranks
The Republican wingnuts, he tanks
When he threatens the Caucus
Called “Freedom.” His raucous
Attacks might just make them say, “Thanks!”
“Repeal & Replace,” A 4-Verse Limerick Saga
Friday, March 24th, 2017Our government once was divided,
A condition Republicans chided.
They would gripe and they’d grouse:
“Ruling Senate and House
Ain’t enough. Give us power three-sided.”
Then it happened — their guy beat our dame!
Now with White House control they’re aflame
To alter our laws
By inserting new flaws
Right away — helping rich folks, their aim.
They began with “repeal and replace,”
An action they vowed they would ace;
First they’d get full control,
Then they’d easily roll
All the Dems — this they promised their base.
But the bill that was key to their game
Has been pulled to the GOP’s shame.
Who’s at fault? No, not Trump,
Nor Paul Ryan. The Grump
Claims the powerless Dems are to blame.
Yet Another Benghazi Hearing Limerick (2-Verse)
Saturday, October 24th, 2015That GOP slug-fest of jeering
Was a stamina-trial of a hearing,
For the GOP goal
Was to rattle and roll
HRC. But instead? Pro-Hill cheering.
And for those thinking Clinton’s too old
To be prez, they need only behold
The results of that test
Of endurance — she’d best
Hill’ry’s juniors — Olympian gold!
Limerick Ode To The Benghazi-Obsessed Hillary Haters
Friday, October 23rd, 2015The Hillary haters are sad.
They were praying that Hill would do bad
At hearings designed
To put Hill in a bind
And malign, wear her down, drive her mad.
But Hillary won in a rout.
Trey Gowdy and co left no doubt
That her rep they must shatter.
To them, facts don’t matter
In their shamef’ly political bout.
Paul Ryan REALLY Doesn’t Want To Be Speaker (2-Verse Limerick)
Wednesday, October 21st, 2015I have read each Paul Ryan demand,
Which he labels “requests.” They won’t stand.
There is no way that raucous
So-called “Freedom Caucus”
Assents, and that’s Ryan’s scheme grand.
When you don’t want a job, then you’re free
To ask for the world, which you see
Is what Ryan has done.
They say “No?” Then he’s won…
And back to his old job he’ll flee.
Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)
Monday, February 23rd, 2015Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A government shutdown sounds sordid,
And I’m hoping it’s somehow aborted.
But the House GOP
Views the dangers with glee;
They assume they’ll again be rewarded.
The Party Of White Guys Strikes Again
Wednesday, November 19th, 2014Republican gals
awarded but one House chair–
housekeeping gavel.
Twenty-one gavels–
GOP guys get twenty.
One lone gal “keeps house.”
For those who are keeping score, Rep. Candice Miller is the only woman who will be wielding a gavel in the Republican-controlled House. Twenty committee chairmanships go to guys (mostly white), while the least prestigious one — the House Administration Committee — goes (again) to Miller.
Miller’s committee runs the day-to-day operations of the House. So if there’s a hearing about problems with the House cafeteria or bathrooms, Candice Miller’s “The Man.”
To be fair, the Administration Committee’s other principal function is oversight over federal elections. So I suppose Miller can also hold hearings on how to make it harder for Democrats to vote.
The “Overrun” Speaker (Limerick)
Saturday, October 19th, 2013How does John Boehner explain away and excuse his role in the government shutdown?
“I got overrun, that’s what happened.”
The “Overrun” Speaker (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What is Boehner’s excuse? He’s got none,
Meekly claiming he “got overrun.”
He could scarcely be weaker;
His job as the Speaker
Is leading — he’s left it undone.
Limerick Ode To The Government Shutdown
Monday, September 30th, 2013Limerick Ode To The Government Shutdown
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A government shutdown’s arrived–
An avoidable crisis contrived
By the wingnutty House,
Who blackmail and grouse
Over battles they’ve lost and revived.
Open Limerick To “Speaker” Boehner
Monday, September 30th, 2013Open Limerick To “Speaker” Boehner
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Boehner, while reading the news,
I’m bewildered — it tends to confuse:
Either somebody stole
Your Speakership role,
Or you gave it to Senator Cruz.
Open Limerick To House Republicans
Wednesday, July 11th, 2012Open Limerick To House Republicans
By Madeleine Begun Kane
House Republicans, kindly get real:
Your big focus is health care repeal—
Over thirty such votes!
Where’s your bill that promotes
“Jobs, jobs, jobs” with equivalent zeal?
Paul Ryan, Educator???
Saturday, July 16th, 2011The debt ceiling absolutely, positively must be raised to avoid a fiscal meltdown, and the Republican leadership knows it. But they’re saddled with a bunch of ignorant, “Tea Party” Congress-critters whose votes they desperately need.
Ironically, the job of educating them about debt ceiling realities has fallen to Paul Ryan, the Prince of Budget Misinformation.
Here’s what I’m wondering: The “Tea Party” nuts bought Paul Ryan’s lies. Will they believe him when he speaks the truth?
Paul Ryan, Educator???
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though the GOP leadership’s tryin’
To get Tea Party votes, they ain’t buyin’,
Cuz they’re itchin’ to spike
Any debt ceiling hike.
Now the burden to school them’s on Ryan.
Limerick Ode To A Government Shutdown
Thursday, April 7th, 2011Limerick Ode to A Government Shutdown
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The thought of a government shutdown
Should be quickly, decisively cut down.
But I fear that we’re screwed
Cuz of Washington’s mood:
Boehner’s party has turned into Nut Town.
Limerick Ode To Rep. Christopher Lee (Updated — He’s Resigned)
Wednesday, February 9th, 2011It seems Gawker’s got the goods on Rep. Christopher Lee, a conservative, married Republican congressman who serves the 26th District of New York. Apparently, “when he trolls Craigslist’s ‘Women Seeking Men’ forum, he’s Christopher Lee, ‘divorced’ ‘lobbyist’ and ‘fit fun classy guy’ — the sort of guy who’ll even email a shirtless photo to show just how ‘fit’ he is.
Congressman Lee is claiming to be innocent, blaming everything on his being hacked. Unfortunately, the hack post-dates the Craigslist missives. And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Limerick Ode To Rep. Christopher Lee
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The married conservative Lee
Is now weeping a sad “Woe is me!”
Claims his Craigslist transgressions
Were not indiscretions
But hacks jobs, with “proof” we can’t see.
UPDATE: Christopher Lee has resigned.
Intelligence Redesigned
Saturday, December 18th, 2010I didn’t think Republicans could surprise me anymore. But I must confess to being stunned by Rep. Michele “Blabbermouth” Bachmann’s appointment by Boehner to the secretive House Intelligence Committee.
And it seems even Republican insiders share my astonishment:
Bachmann once suggested that Congress should investigate whether Democratic lawmakers were pro- or anti-America, and she’s been a cable TV favorite because she’s known for colorful sound bites.
On her Facebook page, Tea Party icon Bachmann said:
As a mother of five biological children and twenty-three foster children I pledge to do whatever I need to do to keep your family, my family, and the United States safe from harm.
I feel safer already. But I still had to write this limerick:
Intelligence Redesigned
By Madeleine Begun Kane
I don’t normally make much ado
‘Bout committee appointments. Do you?
But Intelligence? Bachmann?
That’s really a shock men.
I fear for its plunging IQ.
Doomed Limerick
Thursday, October 17th, 2013The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.
Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Furloughed Employees, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate, Washington DC
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