Archive for the ‘New York Politics’ Category

Dear Donald (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 4th, 2023

Here’s a free tip for Trump: Spewing bile
Is best to avoid while on trial.
It may help you raise cash,
But it still remains rash.
My advice: Try pretending to smile.

Hooray For Trump’s 1st Arraignment!

Tuesday, April 4th, 2023


Hooray for the Donald’s arraignment!
It’s much more than a mere entertainment.
The man must be jailed,
His freedom curtailed.
I can’t wait till he’s under restrainment.

*****

Though Trump masquerades
as a pol for the people,
he’s just for himself.

An Out-Of-Control U.S. Supreme Court? (Limerick)

Wednesday, November 3rd, 2021

Headline: “Supreme Court appears skeptical of New York’s restrictive gun-control law”

New York gun control’s likely to slip,
Cuz the highest Fed Court lacks a grip
On our big city needs
To forestall deadly deeds.
I just hope it won’t shoot from the hip!

NYC’s Board Of Elections Blows It Again (Limerick)

Wednesday, June 30th, 2021

Headline: “New York Mayor’s Race in Chaos After Elections Board Counts 135,000 Test Ballots”

New York’s contest for mayor’s been thrown
Into chaos; its tally’s been blown
By The Board of Elections,
Whose ballot corrections
Will be tainted — the truth deemed unknown.

My Primary Problem (Limerick)

Tuesday, June 22nd, 2021

It’s Primary Day here, and so…
It is off to the polls we must go.
But these ballots are weird;
Far worse than I feared!
Ranked choice voting? I’d rather vote “NO!”

Essentially New York (Limerick)

Sunday, March 22nd, 2020

Headline: “Cheers! New York liquor stores deemed ‘essential’ and can stay open amid coronavirus crisis”

What’s “essential” right here in New York?
Nearly anything needing a fork.
Drugs and paper goods too,
And to this I say, WHEW:
Refreshments that come with a cork.

A Limerick For New York’s Mayor

Monday, November 6th, 2017

Bill de Blasio’s reign has been poor,
And I’m desp’rate to show him the door.
But the others are worse,
So it seems (with a curse)
I’ll vote “Bill,” but won’t say “Je l’adore.”

Limerick Ode To Donald J. Trump State Park

Tuesday, July 21st, 2015

New York’s beautiful Taconic State Parkway is marred by signage litter; ostentatious signs directing people to the non-park known as Donald J. Trump State Park. (Rachel Maddow explains the history of this non-park with its misleading, annoying signs. She even takes us for a tour in this entertaining video.)

Alas, this just-pretend park sits right between our Bayside, Queens house and our tiny summer cottage in Putnam Valley. So those damn signs routinely haunt and taunt us, which brings me to this limerick:

There’s a fine New York road, the Taconic;
With its lush mountain views, it’s a tonic…
Or it was in the past.
But the signs it’s amassed
For the Donald J. Trump Park? Demonic!

My 1991 “Ode To A Perplexed Governor” as published in New York Newsday (With Apologies to William Shakespeare)

Friday, January 2nd, 2015

I was very saddened to hear that former New York Governor Mario Cuomo has died. He was a fine governor and might very well have been a good president or U.S. Supreme Court Justice.

In reading his obits, I recalled that back in 1991 I wrote a Hamlet-style soliloquy for New York Newsday, related to Mario Cuomo’s indecisiveness about running for president. So I dug it out of my ancient archives, and here it is:

To run, or not to run: that is the question:
Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous deficits
Or to take arms against a sea of Republicans,
And by opposing, defeat them. To reign at home:
Or to sleep at home no more: and by running to say we’ll end
The fiscal heart-ache, and the thousand natural shocks
The northeast is heir to, ’tis a consummation
Devoutly to be wish’d. To quit, to run;
To run: perchance to lose: ay, there’s the rub;
For in that White House quest what brutal press may come,
When we have shuttled off this Albany soil,
Must give us pause: there’s the respect
That makes calamity of so long New York;
For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,
The opponent’s wrong, the public abuse,
The pangs of disprized voters, the law’s delay,
The insolence of office, and the spurns
That Democrats suffer from the media snakes,
If the Governor simply plays it safe
In the comfort of his Statehouse? Who would those burdens bear,
To drone that keynote speech night after night,
But that the dread of a crash in ’93 ,
A wrecked economy from whose depths
There is no return, puzzles the will,
And makes us rather bear those ills we have
Than fly to Washington finding who knows what?
Thus conscience does make cowards of us all,
And thus the native hue of resolution
Is sicklied o’er with fear of the polls,
And primaries of great pitch and moment
Seem less appealing as we fear each loss
And lose through sheer inaction.

Trafficking In Hypocrisy (Limerick)

Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio’s been catching some flack lately over his traffic-safety initiative. It seems he doesn’t practice what he preaches.

Trafficking In Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Bill de Blasio warns New York folk
To drive carefully. Safety’s no joke.
Yet the rules take a hike
In Bill’s auto. Did Mike
Ever guzzle a giant-sized Coke?

Note from Mad Kane: For those who don’t follow New York City politics, former Mayor Mike Bloomberg (whom de Blasio criticizes at every opportunity) is famous/infamous for banning super-sized sodas.

Trumped Up Campaign (Limerick)

Tuesday, January 14th, 2014

Here we go again! It’s too early to pretend to run for U.S. President. So instead, Donald Trump is fake-running for Governor of New York State.

Trumped Up Campaign (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

This brainchild (I trust) won’t get far:
New York Governor Trump — TV star.
He might run, Donald claims,
But we know his true aim’s
To get press for his show … or be czar.

Open Limerick To Anthony Weiner

Thursday, May 23rd, 2013

The audacity of politicians never ceases to astonish me. And Anthony Weiner’s run for New York City Mayor is only the latest example. I just don’t see how he can ever live down his Twitter scandal, and I say that as a New Yorker and former fan.

Open Limerick To Anthony Weiner
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Mr. Weiner, I once was a fan;
You’re an outspoken, liberal man.
But I’m sorry –you’re screwed
By the “ick” factor, dude,
So your mayor plans simply don’t scan.

Limerick Ode To Peter King

Friday, March 1st, 2013

Some article titles say it all: “Pete King Can’t Believe Rubio Has the ‘Balls’ to Fundraise in New York.”

Here’s Rep. Peter King, a conservative Republican who represents much of Long Island, New York:

“Being from New York we’re not supposed to be suckers,” Mr. King told Politicker this morning. “It’s bad enough that these guys voted against it, that’s inexcusable enough. But to have the balls to come in and say, ‘We screwed you now make us president?’”

Limerick Ode To Peter King
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear wealthy New Yorkers, says King,
Do not give any money or bling
To a pol who said “no”
To the Storm Sandy dough.
I agree, which feels odd — King’s right-wing.

Limerick Ode To Ed Koch

Friday, February 1st, 2013

Rest In Peace, Edward Koch. ( December 12, 1924 – February 1, 2013)

Limerick Ode To Ed Koch
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Ed Koch sure was one of a kind:
Got my city right out of its bind.
“How’m I doing?” he’d ask.
Praise would flow, and he’d bask.
We shall miss his New York state of mind.

Limerick Ode To Legalized Same-Sex Marriage In New York

Saturday, June 25th, 2011

Congratulations to the New York State Legislature and to Governor Andrew Cuomo. Governor Cuomo promised to legalize same-sex marriage in New York and he’s somehow managed to pull it off.

I’m extra proud to be a New Yorker today!

Limerick Ode To Legalized Same-Sex Marriage In New York
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Good news in New York for the gays:
They can join in our straight-wedding ways.
Same sex marriage has passed.
There’s some fairness at last.
Many thanks for those “yes” votes. Give praise!

A Limerick Farewell To Anthony Weiner

Thursday, June 16th, 2011

Limerick Farewell To Anthony Wiener
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m feeling forlorn, but resigned.
We have lost a great liberal mind.
There was really no choice
But to lose Weiner’s voice—
His behavior put Dems in a bind.

Let’s hope this is only a pause—
That one day he’ll be cured of his flaws—
With the passage of time
He’ll arise from the slime
And further our liberal cause.

Limerick Ode To Anthony Weiner

Monday, June 6th, 2011

Needless to say, I’m disappointed in Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY).

Limerick Ode To Anthony Weiner
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Seems a lib’ral I favor, Rep. Weiner
Has committed a dumb misdemeanor.
Then he lied in the hope
He could fool us — the dope.
Progressives, our team just got leaner.

Limerick Ode To Rep. Christopher Lee (Updated — He’s Resigned)

Wednesday, February 9th, 2011

It seems Gawker’s got the goods on Rep. Christopher Lee, a conservative, married Republican congressman who serves the 26th District of New York. Apparently, “when he trolls Craigslist’s ‘Women Seeking Men’ forum, he’s Christopher Lee, ‘divorced’ ‘lobbyist’ and ‘fit fun classy guy’ — the sort of guy who’ll even email a shirtless photo to show just how ‘fit’ he is.

Congressman Lee is claiming to be innocent, blaming everything on his being hacked. Unfortunately, the hack post-dates the Craigslist missives. And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Limerick Ode To Rep. Christopher Lee
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The married conservative Lee
Is now weeping a sad “Woe is me!”
Claims his Craigslist transgressions
Were not indiscretions
But hacks jobs, with “proof” we can’t see.

UPDATE: Christopher Lee has resigned.

Limerick Ode To Carl Paladino

Wednesday, October 6th, 2010

I’m a liberal New York Democrat, and I’ll say one thing for Carl Paladino — the guy has chutzpah. After his bizarre, near-violent attack on the New York Post’s Fred Dicker last week, he had the audacity to describe gubernatorial opponent Andrew Cuomo as “out of control.”

Apparently this is how an in-control candidate behaves:

1. Accuses his opponent (Andrew Cuomo) of cheating on wife.

2. Accuses Rupert Murdoch’s New York Post of bias because it didn’t ask Cuomo about wife-cheating.

3. Menaces and comes dangerously close to physically harming the old, frail-looking Fred Dicker because Dicker had the audacity to ask if he had any evidence that Cuomo cheated on his wife.

4. Promises to produce wife-cheating evidence at the appropriate time.

5. Denies that he promised to produce wife-cheating evidence.

6. After a video of his bullying, abusive, and near-violent attack on Dicker draws a negative response and a loose cannon perception, even among Republicans, tells the Wall Street Journal he wants to focus on the issues.

Limerick Ode To Carl Paladino
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Paladino is always irate,
Spreading venom and anger and hate.
He claims to be able,
But seems quite unstable.
If he wins, we are screwed — no debate.

Harry Reid’s Not So Hot Remark

Tuesday, September 21st, 2010

When it comes to sexism posing as a compliment, I try to cut Harry Reid’s generation some slack. But Senator Reid really ought to know better:

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid had an unusual form of praise for New York’s junior senator, Kirsten Gillibrand, this morning at the fundraiser Mayor Bloomberg hosted for him at his townhouse – referring to her as “the hottest member” as she sat just a few feet away, according to three sources.

The comment prompted Gillibrand to turn red, according to the sources, and created a bit of stir among the small crowd there.

That leads me to my latest limerick:

Harry Reid’s Not So Hot Remark
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Kirsten Gillibrand’s hot says Sen. Reid —
The Sen’s “hottest member,” indeed.
Now I know Harry’s old,
And I don’t mean to scold,
But that “compliment’s” sexist. Take heed.

Here’s more on subtle sexism, including my Gender At Work essay. (Gender at Work, under the name My Most Attractive Adversary, is the lead Gender Gap chapter essay in a pair of college textbooks by Gary Goshgarian: The Contemporary Reader and Readings For Today.)