AWOL Muse (Limerick)

January 20th, 2017

If you stop by my page, I’m afraid
You’ll spot flop-sweat; my sage muse has strayed.
From her shocked disappointment
At Donald’s anointment
She brayed, “There’s no point! We’re betrayed!”

Missing Obama Already (Limerick)

January 19th, 2017

Anybody else missing Obama already?

Prez Donald’s our national bane;
We must brace to be plunged down the drain.
Though I’d rather not whine,
I just can’t help but pine
For a man in the Oval who’s sane.

Trump’s D-List Inaugural (Limerick)

January 17th, 2017

Poor Donald! Inaug’ral arenas
Can’t lure stars. (Time to laugh like hyenas.)
Entertainer-Trump’s failed.
Even B-Street Band’s bailed!
Here’s my modest proposal: Subpoenas!

Limerick Ode To “Gracelessness In Victory”

January 16th, 2017

As Dana Milbank points out:

“With charity for none and with malice toward all but his supporters, [Trump] has in the past two months set a new standard for gracelessness in victory.”

It’s apparent that Trump is a sinner
And a lying, conniving tale spinner.
But the oddest of all
His misdeeds, large and small,
Is that Trump’s a ginormous sore winner.

Trump’s Been Limerick-ing Again

January 16th, 2017

Those who claim my election’s illicit,
Saying I’m with V. Putin complicit,
Are misplacing their scorn;
Donald Trump’s native born,
Unlike Bar! So my ass? You can kiss it!

Marketing A Unicorn (Limerick)

January 15th, 2017

There’s an ad with a rather odd twist;
A GOP health ad, whose gist
Is the plan that replaces
Obamacare’s aces…
What a shame such plan DOESN’T exist.

The American Action Network, a conservative advocacy group linked to House GOP leadership, is running an ad claiming that an unidentified Republican “plan will create a health insurance system that has ‘more choices,’ ‘better care,’ and ‘lower costs’ than the ACA.”

You can watch the BS ad here.

Trump Nominees Versus Trump??? (Limerick)

January 13th, 2017

My latest limerick was inspired by the stark differences between Trump’s signature campaign promises and the positions of his Cabinet picks.

While under the hearing lights’ glare
Donald’s picks make it clear they don’t share
Major policy views
With their prez. Does he snooze
Through their shmoozes … or simply not care?

Trump’s “Germaphobe” Defense (Limerick)

January 11th, 2017

According to Trump, certain salacious sexual allegations about him couldn’t be true because he’s a “germaphobe.”

“Golden showers?” Who, me? There’s no way
I’d engage in such practice. Nyet! Nay!
Dodging germs would be tricky.
They’re sticky and icky–
Not as good a quick, sterile lay!

Donald Tweets To Putin (Limerick)

December 30th, 2016

This Trump tweet requires a limerick, don’t you think?
“Great move on delay (by V. Putin) – I always knew he was very smart!”

Donald Trump praises Putin as “smart,”
In effect telling Putin, “Take heart;
“Very soon you will own
“The Oval. Just phone
“With instructions. I can’t wait to start.”

Arise (Limerick)

December 30th, 2016

There’s a U.S. reality gap,
Where actual facts are deemed pap
And derided as lies.
It’s time to get wise
And arise from our nightmarish nap.

In the meantime we’re haplessly trapped;
Our nation’s been kidnapped and zapped
By a fellow whose con
Has allowed him to don
The cloak of great power, untapped.

Laugh-Free Limerick

December 20th, 2016

A man whose behavior’s bizarre
Has been mocked from both near and afar.
But no matter his gaffes,
Frauds, and falsehoods, the laugh’s
On his foes, as Trump HAS the last HAR.

Open Limerick To Donald Trump (2-Verse)

December 17th, 2016

Dear Donald: Stop bragging and gloating
And mischaracterizing the voting.
Show some dignity. Preening
And boasting’s demeaning.
And so is your crude self-promoting.

You have pulled off remarkable feats,
So enough with the paranoid bleats.
Think twice before speaking
And enemy-tweaking.
And try NOT to launch wars with your tweets!

Trump’s Secret Limerick To Putin

December 16th, 2016

Dear Vlad, I can’t publicly say
How grateful I am. Your display
Of email artillery
Helped me to pillory
Hill’ry. Your bribe’s on the way.

Limerick Ode To Trump’s Cabinet

December 15th, 2016

A Cab’net of wealthy white men;
The richest, white male group, since when?
Since Bush Senior presided.
A wee bit lopsided?
For balance — Ivanka — rich hen.

Trump’s Ongoing Con Job (Limerick)

December 15th, 2016

Donald’s populist ploy goes beyond
Any con job I’ve ever seen spawned.
Yet his fans (who should keen
From the rich, elite sheen
Of Trump’s Cab’net) don’t know they’ve been conned.

I’m (Dance) Floored By Perry’s Nomination (Limerick)

December 15th, 2016

I’ve finally figured out what qualifies former Texas governor Rick Perry to be Energy Sec: He’s an energetic dancer.

Anyone who believes Perry is qualified to lead the Department of Energy, probably makes this association: “Texas equals oil equals energy.” What a shame that energy resources like oil and gas are handled by a totally different agency: The Department of Interior.

So what’s the main job of the department Trump wants Perry to lead? Hint: sciencey stuff involving nuclear weapons and waste.

What qualifies Perry to be
Donald’s Energy Sec? Here’s my plea:
Kindly don’t mention oil.
(Oil’s Interior’s toil.)
As for Rick’s gig, nuke know-how is key.

A Lackluster C-Lister Inauguration? (Limerick)

December 15th, 2016

Poor Donald! The best entertainers
Were ardent pro-Clinton campaigners,
Who do NOT want to sing
At Trump’s wingding; They cling
To their stance as Inaug’ral abstainers.

Trump’s Make-Believe Firewall (Limerick)

December 14th, 2016

Trump has conflicts of int’rest galore.
Think you’re tracking them all? Count some more!
Watch sons Donald and Eric
(His firewall chimeric)
Play roles in the Cab’net pick chore.

Trump’s Oopsie Pick (Limerick)

December 13th, 2016

A Department of Energy? Why?
I forget what it’s called, but goodbye!
That was Rick Perry’s view.
Now the “Oops!” guy’s Trump’s new
Pick to lead it. Are both fellows high?

I’m Weeping For Trump’s Sacrifices (Limerick)

December 12th, 2016

Trump’s interview on Chris Wallace’s Fox News Sunday is beyond belief, even for Trump. Hence this limerick:

Poor Donald! That fellow’s rejected
Deals worth billions, since Trump’s been elected.
Int’rest conflicts? No way!
He avoids them each day.
What a wall of deceit he’s erected!