Posts Tagged ‘New Hampshire’

Limerick Ode To Chris “Suicide Bomber” Christie

Wednesday, February 10th, 2016

Although Marco’s been weakened by Chris,
Chris Christie’s not feeling the bliss.
For while mauling that pup
Christie blew himself up;
His reward in New Hampshire? Big diss!

Limerick Ode To Newt “I’m Not Rich” Gingrich

Saturday, January 7th, 2012

During a Laconia, New Hampshire campaign stop, Newt had the audacity to say “I’m not rich.” And his wife Callista helpfully added, “We have one home.” Apparently Newt and I don’t share the same definition of rich:

This past summer, Gingrich had to file the financial-disclosure form required of presidential candidates. It revealed that he has a net worth of at least $6.7 million and that his income was at least $2.6 million in 2010. That’s about 65 times the income of the average family of four in the United States.

Limerick Ode To Newt “I’m Not Rich” Gingrich
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Newt Gingrich would like to be king
And is part of the wealthy right-wing.
He denies that he’s rich.
Just “one home” — what a bitch!
He should shorten his surname to “Ging.”

Limerick Ode To Gaffe-Prone Perry

Wednesday, November 30th, 2011

In Rick Perry’s apparent drive to make George W. Bush look like a genius, Perry’s been entertainingly gaffe-prone this week. While campaigning in New Hampshire, Perry managed to screw up both the voting eligibility age and the date of Election Day 2012. The next day, Perry dismissed these errors as proving he was human. He went on to further prove his humanness with a reference to New Hampshire’s non-existent caucuses.

Limerick Ode To Gaffe-Prone Perry
By Madeleine Begun

Dear Rick, I don’t wish to be mean,
But the age one can vote is eighteen.
Where’d you get twenty-one?
And Election Day, hon,
Is the 6th, as most pre-teens could glean.

Ode To Sarah “Geography-Challenged” Palin

Tuesday, October 21st, 2008

Sarah Palin has a very strange relationship with geography.  Who else do you know who:

1) Keeps an eye on Russia from her Alaska bedroom window;
2) Thinks Afghanistan is “our neighboring country;”
3) Describes New Hampshire as being part of our “great Northwest;” and
4) Tells crowds how much she enjoys visiting “pro-America areas” of America. 

Come to think of it, that last one does make some sense to me: Palin’s marriage to a (presumably reformed) secessionist, must surely make meeting pro-America Americans refreshing, indeed.

However,  I do remain concerned about Palin’s Afghanistan and New Hampshire problem:

Ode To Sarah “Geography-Challenged” Palin
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Gov. Palin’s geography gap
Is appalling. Please give her a map.
This isn’t a test,
But New Hampshire? Northwest?
On our “neighbor” Afghanistan’s lap?