Archive for August, 2009

Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Texting?

Monday, August 31st, 2009

Brace yourself for a large dose of libertarian outrage: Texting while driving may soon be outlawed.

An organization of state highway safety officials on Monday plans to call for a ban on texting while driving, joining a growing chorus of legislators and safety advocates endorsing such a policy.

The group, the Governors Highway Safety Association, whose members are appointed by state governors to lead highway safety agencies, said it adopted the policy in light of a growing body of research showing the increased crash risk posed by texting motorists.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Life, Liberty and the Pursuit of Texting?
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If you text while you drive, you’re insane.
You’re a hazard like snow, ice, and rain.
And if govs have their way,
You will soon have to say:
“BRB, AFK, must refrain.”

(If my last line needs translating, here’s a chat and text message abbreviation dictionary.)

Related Posts: Multi-Task Madness; Pedestrian Plea; Multitasking Mania; and Contending With Time

Alpha-Political Verse 2009

Thursday, August 27th, 2009

From time to time, I write an alphabetical poem summing up a period’s zany and significant political moments. (My last one said goodbye and good riddance to Bush and Cheney.)

Although Barack Obama’s administration is still relatively new, there’s already plenty of material for another piece of alpha-political poetry:

A is for Alaska with its lovely Russian view.

B is for the Birthers who will rant and rave on cue.

C is for conservatives co-opted by the loons.

D is for each Democrat who caves and often swoons.

E is for elections that just never seem to stop.

F’s for raising endless funds so pols will stay on on top.

G’s for GOPers who so love to misinform.

H is for our health care — much in need of broad reform.

I is for insurance co’s. They love the status quo.

J’s for Joseph Lieberman. He really needs to go.

K’s for Teddy Kennedy whose legacy is great.

L is for Rush Limbaugh whose big talent’s spreading hate.

M’s for John McCain who’s always on a Sunday show.

N’s for nihilist congressmen, so fond of saying “No!”

O is for Obama. Hope he’s worthy of his rise.

P is for Fox pundits and their “fair and balanced” lies.

Q is for the questions town hall crackpots often pose.

R’s for right-wing zealots who are truthful-info foes.

S is for Mark Sanford’s Argentinean affair.

T’s for Texans Perry and Pete Sessions. What a pair!

U is the USA. There’s greatness at its core.

V’s for fam’ly values preached by hypocrites galore.

W’s for Dubya and the mess he left behind.

X and Y and Z are hard. Their rhymes I can not find.

Ode To Ted Kennedy (Tribute Limerick)

Wednesday, August 26th, 2009

Most limericks are humorous … or at least meant to be funny. But today I’ve written a serious double limerick to commemorate the life and death of the great Senator Ted Kennedy:

Ode To Ted Kennedy (Tribute Poem)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A Kennedy fondly called Ted
Has, alas, been declared to be dead.
He was loved cross the aisle
And did so much worthwhile
Which is why floods of tears shall be shed.

Teddy worked for the poor and the weak,
The oppressed and the wronged and the meek.
He was proudly progressive,
A lib’ral-obsessive.
Pass health reform — crown Teddy’s streak.

Ode To The White House Fashion Police

Friday, August 21st, 2009

The White House fashion police are at it again: First Lady Michelle Obama was caught wearing shorts on her way to a Grand Canyon vacation! The horror!

Ode To The White House Fashion Police (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Once again I just can’t help but frown
At the journalists going to town:
“The First Lady wore shorts,”
Blare the breathless reports.
Please Michelle, when you hike wear a gown.

Related Post: Dear Maureen Dowd, I Don’t Like Your Tone

Open Limerick To President Obama

Tuesday, August 18th, 2009

Watching Republicans out-maneuver President Obama on “bi-partisan” health care reform has been so painful, I sometimes feel forced to avert my eyes. So I’ve written this open double limerick to President Obama:

An Open Limerick To President Obama
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Obama, the GOP’s clear:
Won’t support any health reform. Hear?
You can whittle the bill
Down to bupkis — you still
Won’t get votes. Yes they’ve duped you, I fear.

Your naivety’s hurting our cause.
And so how about taking a pause?
Work with Dems on the Hill
To create a fresh bill
That has nary a GOP clause.

Related Posts: Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies

Grumpy Blogroll Limerick

Tuesday, August 18th, 2009

I was a bit surprised to realize that the third Blogiversary of Mad Kane’s Political Madness is coming up on September 23rd. Of course, I’ve been blogging a whole lot longer than three years: I launched my Mad Kane’s Notables Blog back in September 2001 and started Dubya’s Dayly Diary on January 20, 2001.

Anyway, I figured I’d do a bit of housekeeping in anticipation of my Political Madness blogiversary. So I reviewed my blogroll to look for links that needed updating. And in the process, I made a disappointing discovery. Not only have several bloggers de-linked me, but dozens of active blogs are still linking to my long-defunct Notables Blog.

Now even if those bloggers failed to get my email requests for a blogroll update, you’d think they might have visited my site at least once in the last three years, noticed my relocation, and adjusted their blogrolls.

The upshot of all this is that, with a few exceptions, I’ve de-linked any blog that either has de-linked me or that still links to my Mad Kane’s Notables.

Of course, I’ll be happy to re-link anyone who notifies me (in an email or in my comments) that my Mad Kane’s Political Madness is on their blogroll.

No post would be complete without a limerick, right? So here’s my love-letter-limerick to those who still link to my obsolete blog:

Grumpy Blogroll Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If my link to your blog has gone missing,
Instead of complaining and hissing,
Check your blog and you’ll see
That your linkage to me
Is outdated three years. Reminiscing?

Related Post: Weblog Wonderland

Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them

Sunday, August 16th, 2009

Republican hypocrisy is stunning. Almost everyone who’s been throwing around the “death panel” epithet used to have a very different opinion of end-of-life-care planning:

1) Back in her half-term as Alaska governor, Sarah Palin spoke out for advance healthcare directives in her 2008 Healthcare Decision Day Proclamation.

2) Rush Limbaugh enthusiastically read ad copy championing LegalZoom.com, whose services include do-it-yourself living wills.

3) Newt Gingrich recently advocated for advance directives (end-of-life planning) in his July 2nd Washington Post column.

4) Most Senate and House Republicans voted to fund counseling for end-of-life issues and care in George W. Bush’s 2003 Medicare prescription drug bill.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Sarah and Limbaugh and Newt,
Put your “death panel” nonsense on mute.
Cuz you once were big fans
Of end-of-life plans.
Were they “death panels” too? Now please scoot!

Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Tantrum Politics; and Waterloo Lies

Our Liberal Media (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 11th, 2009

Steve Benen points out the contrast between the coverage of two abortion-related polls:

In mid-May, Gallup released a poll that found 51% of Americans calling themselves “pro-life” and 42% “pro-choice.” It was the first time a majority of U.S. adults had identified themselves as pro-life since Gallup began asking the question. Last week, however, Gallup released a follow-up poll showing the pro-life lead evaporating, dropping from nine points to one, 47% to 46%.

The first poll got tons of coverage, while the second was largely ignored:

So, to review, Gallup results showing strong “pro-life” numbers are a huge story, even though the results were dubious. Gallup results showing weaker “pro-life” numbers are a non-story, even though the results made sense.

And that brings me to my latest limerick:

Our Liberal Media
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The pro-lifer numbers are higher
Touted journos, their keyboards afire.
So why don’t they mention
The numbers’ descension?
So much for our liberal choir.

Tantrum Politics

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

Planning to attend a local town hall meeting about health care reform? Hoping to learn something and to express your opinion?

Well, be sure to bring a pair of ear plugs. Because the only thing you’re likely to hear is an enraged, screaming mob. And the only thing you’re likely to learn is that it’s frustrating and possibly dangerous to be a Democratic Congressperson.

Here’s my limerick about the right-wing scheme to stifle intelligent discussion of the issues by inciting angry mobs to shout down these meetings.

Tantrum Politics
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If reform can’t be fought using facts,
Simply give civil discourse the ax.
Block discussion with mobs
Packed with morons like Dobbs.
That’s the path of Republican hacks.

Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; and Waterloo Lies

Waterloo Lies

Tuesday, August 4th, 2009

Back in July, South Carolina Senator Jim DeMint bragged about Republican plans to “break” Obama. How? By killing health care reform, turning health care into Obama’s “Waterloo.”

So it’s no surprise that the President’s foes are wielding the Big Lie in their non-stop efforts to block reform. Or that their lies target the elderly, scaring them into thinking Democrats intend to mandate elder-euthanasia.

This brings me to my latest limerick, Waterloo Lies:

Waterloo Lies
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The GOP’s spreading big lies
To ensure that our health reform dies:
“The bill will kill gran —
Shorten seniors’ life span.”
Their goal? Cut Barack down to size.

Update: Check out the interesting and informative Health Wonk Review.

Related Posts: An Open Limerick To President Obama; Republicans Were For “Death Panels” Before They Were Against Them; and Tantrum Politics