Archive for the ‘Military Humor’ Category

Surplus Madness (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 1st, 2014

Have you ever wondered how police departments ended up looking like military units? An excellent Mother Jones article explains the method behind the madness, which I’ve tried to summarize in this limerick:

Surplus Madness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Here’s why cops appear ready for war,
Stocked with Pentagon loaners galore:
Lend your surplus to cops,
And your storage cost drops.
Then make give-backs an arduous chore.

War Weary Limerick

Thursday, September 5th, 2013

I do not support U.S. military intervention in Syria — seriously!

War Weary Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though I’m constantly knocking and mocking
The Republican habit of blocking
The President’s moves,
I think it behooves
Both parties to thwart his war hawking.

Limerick Ode To The Repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”

Tuesday, September 20th, 2011

Limerick Ode To The Repeal of “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell”
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Hooray! “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” has ended.
Civil liberties lovers say, “Splendid!”
But it’s mourned by some jerks
Who think killed-at-war “perks”
Should only to “straights” be extended.

Limerick Ode To Bin Laden’s Death

Monday, May 2nd, 2011

Limerick Ode To Bin Laden’s Death
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Republicans had a great plan:
Make Barack seem an alien man.
So bin Laden’s demise
(A stunning surprise)
Turns their plot to a flash in the pan.

A Tragic Limerick Ode To John McCain

Sunday, December 19th, 2010

If John McCain hadn’t done quite so much damage to our nation, I could almost feel sorry for him. After all, it’s hard not to pity a man who’s turned into a pathetic shell of a human being.

McCain’s Don’t Ask Don’t Tell repeal temper tantrum is only the latest example of the sad, ugly person that McCain’s become:

A Tragic Limerick Ode To John McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane

John McCain seems embittered and mean,
Acting worse than a badly raised teen.
His convictions? No more!
Just conniptions galore.
He’s lost heart, and he’s left with just spleen.

Hatching Hypocrisy

Thursday, June 3rd, 2010

Okay, so we have two Senatorial candidates who’ve pumped up their military records — Republican Mark Kirk of Illinois and Democrat Richard Blumenthal of Connecticut. We also have the horrified Republican Senator Orrin Hatch, who’s hatched the upright-sounding Stolen Valor Act. Just one problem: According to Hatch, it would criminalize Blumenthal’s behavior but (surprise, surprise) not Kirk’s.

Hatching Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When a pol says he fought for our land
And exaggerates, bolst’ring his brand,
That’s a crime, says Sen Hatch.
But of course there’s a catch:
Only Dems need obey this command.

Update: One of my few Republican Facebook friends, Rob Hood, posted a limerick response in Facebook asserting that I engage in anti-GOP gloating. Here’s my limerick rejoinder:

I’m a Dem, but I’m surely not gloating.
There’s no reason for happy emoting.
Though the GOP’s worse
Than the Dems, here’s our curse:
Most pols do not merit our voting.

Inflammatory Fleming

Sunday, April 11th, 2010

It’s bad enough to write an anti-Obama column packed with falsehoods about President Obama’s national security policy. But Rep. John Fleming of Louisiana has managed to go way beyond that. He essentially and casually accuses Obama of being a traitor:

Simply put, President Obama is disadvantaging the United States one step at a time and undermining this country’s national defense on purpose.

Rep. Fleming, you’ve earned yourself a limerick:

Inflammatory Fleming
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Rep. Fleming, your piece packed with lies
About nukes and Obama — unwise!
For political reason
You charge him with treason.
The traitor is you, I surmise.

Don’t Ask. Don’t Tell. Just Sign!

Monday, June 15th, 2009

Don’t Ask. Don’t Tell. Just Sign! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Obama, our nation can’t wait.
Please stop ousting the folks who ain’t straight.
Yes, we know your plate’s full,
But I’m sorry — that’s bull!
Sign a “stop-loss.” How long can it take?