Archive for the ‘John McCain’ Category
Tuesday, January 22nd, 2013
Republican pols, most notably John McCain, didn’t find Obama’s second inaugural address sufficiently conciliatory. Here’s McCain:
“There was very little reaching out to the other side,” he said. “It was a fine speech, but I didn’t hear any conciliatory remarks. I didn’t see any specific reference like, ‘I reach out my hand to the other side of the aisle.’ “
Limerick Ode To McCain, The Conciliator
By Madeleine Begun Kane
As Obama’s Inaugural wraps,
John McCain now complains of a lapse:
Just where in the speech
Does the President reach
Cross the aisle to invite some more slaps?
Tags: Barack Obama, Inaugural Address, Inauguration, John McCain, Political Speech
Posted in Barack Obama, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Speeches, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 5 Comments »
Thursday, November 29th, 2012
Republican Senators John McCain, Lindsey Graham and Kelly Ayotte have a seemingly irrational vendetta against U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice, centering on Benghazi. What explains it? Well, Rachel Maddow has a fascinating theory, which Mark Karlin buys, as do I.
Here’s how the theory works:
1) Republicans are lusting after John Kerry’s Senate seat, eying it for soon-to-be ex-Senator Scott Brown.
2) Kerry and Rice are the only contenders for Secretary of State.
3) If Kerry gets State, he has to give up his seat, and Brown has a good shot at winning a special election to replace him.
4) Rice is standing in Kerry’s way, so she must be eliminated by the McCain/Graham/Ayotte trio.
In other words:
Rice Madness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
If Obama gives State to John Kerry
The GOP’s bound to be merry:
Scott Brown can then run
For John’s seat. Oh what fun!
This explains why they’ll Susan Rice bury.
Tags: Barack Obama, Benghazi, John McCain, Kelly Ayotte, Lindsey Graham, State Department, Susan Rice, United Nations
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, John McCain, Lindsey Graham, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 6 Comments »
Sunday, December 19th, 2010
If John McCain hadn’t done quite so much damage to our nation, I could almost feel sorry for him. After all, it’s hard not to pity a man who’s turned into a pathetic shell of a human being.
McCain’s Don’t Ask Don’t Tell repeal temper tantrum is only the latest example of the sad, ugly person that McCain’s become:
A Tragic Limerick Ode To John McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane
John McCain seems embittered and mean,
Acting worse than a badly raised teen.
His convictions? No more!
Just conniptions galore.
He’s lost heart, and he’s left with just spleen.
Tags: DADT, John McCain, Military, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate
Posted in Don't Ask Don't Tell Humor, Gay Rights, John McCain, Legislation Humor, Military Humor, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Publicity Hounds, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 7 Comments »
Thursday, June 10th, 2010
The language police are at it again. Republicans and Fox News (sorry to be redundant) are simply horrified at President Obama’s “unpresidential” language.
What are they so pretend-upset about? Obama used the word ass in response to Matt Lauer’s oil crisis question about kicking butt.
Apparently this is extremely shocking to the same folks who had no problem with f**ks from Bush, Cheney, and McCain.
That brings me to my latest limerick:
Kick-Ass Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republicans’ delicate ears
Are offended by ass, it appears.
F**k is fine from McCain,
Bush, and Cheney — that’s plain.
But ass from Barack begets jeers.
Tags: Barack Obama, Dick Cheney Satire, Fox News Satire, John McCain, Language Police, Language Satire, Matt Lauer, Republican Hypocrisy
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Dick Cheney Satire, Election Satire, Etiquette Humor, Fox News Humor, George Bush Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Language Humor, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 5 Comments »
Wednesday, May 5th, 2010
My husband Mark and I live in New York City and frequently dine and see plays in the Times Square area. In fact, had the two of us not been so exhausted from our Las Vegas vacation, that’s where we probably would have been Saturday night. Perhaps that’s why I’m especially offended by John McCain’s apparent desire to undermine the prosecution of alleged terrorists.
What am I talking about? McCain said it would be a “serious mistake” if car bombing suspect Faisal Shahzad, a naturalized American citizen, was Mirandized.
I’m sorry, but the only way Mirandizing Shahzad would be a mistake is if your goal is to taint the evidence, get it thrown out of court, and lose the damn case.
And that brings me to my latest two-verse limerick:
John McCain — Ignoramus, Liar, Or Terrorist Sympathizer?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Shahzad was Mirandized. Oh my!
Cue McCain and his pandering lie.
To warn him was wrong—
That’s McCain’s specious song.
He malpractices law on the fly.
For Miranda’s a citizen’s right.
Fail to warn him? You’re in for a fight.
Cuz evidence gotten
That way is deemed rotten.
Acquittal is what you invite.
Tags: Car Bombing, Constitution Verse, Criminal Justice, Criminal Law, Faisal Shahzad, John McCain, Legal Verse, Miranda Rights, Terrorism, Terrorist Trials, Times Square
Posted in Constitution Humor, FBI Humor, John McCain, Law Satire, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Public Safety, Publicity Hounds, Terrorism | 7 Comments »
Monday, April 5th, 2010
Dear Senator McCain: Pretending to be a maverick is bad enough. But pretending that you never pretended to be a maverick? That’s just silly!
Yes, it’s hard to believe, but McCain’s response to J.D. Hayworth’s primary challenge from the right is to say, “I never considered myself a maverick.” Of course, that would be a bit more convincing had McCain not, among other things, released a 2008 presidential campaign ad calling himself the “original maverick.”
That brings me to my latest two-verse limerick:
Ode To John “Pants On Fire” McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was a man named McCain,
The Republicans’ “maverick” bane.
He wore the term proudly
And touted it loudly.
But now it’s a primary pain.
So he’s claiming he never did use it,
Though we know that he’d often abuse it.
But he’s feeling the sting
Of the nutty right-wing,
So with lies he’s attempting to lose it.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, J.D. Hayworth, John McCain, Maverick Limerick, Primaries Humor, Republican Hypocrisy
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Hypocrisy Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Publicity Hounds, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 5 Comments »
Monday, March 22nd, 2010
Now that health reform has passed, Republicans are angrier than ever. Mitt Romney calls it an “unconscionable abuse of power” and Bill Kristol is urging repeal in a Weekly Standard editorial. Moreover, Senators John McCain, Judd Gregg and their fellow GOPers are so incensed that they’ve come up with a very creative threat:
GOP senators emerged Monday to caution that the health debate had taken a toll on the institution, warning of little work between parties the rest of this year.
“There will be no cooperation for the rest of the year,” McCain said during an interview Monday on an Arizona radio affiliate. “They have poisoned the well in what they’ve done and how they’ve done it.”
Wow! The next thing you know, Republicans will be vowing to filibuster and obstruct.
And that brings me to my latest limerick:
Addled Threats
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The GOP’s angry as hell.
Says McCain, Dems have “poisoned the well.”
So the rest of the year
We won’t work with them here.
And how is that diff’rent? Do tell!
********
I proud to say that this post is mentioned in the excellent
Health Wonk Review: Special Edition On Health Reform.
Tags: Congress Satire, GOP Humor, Health Care Reform, Health Insurance, John McCain, Judd Gregg, Legislation Satire, Mitt Romney, Republicans Humor, Senate Humor, Weekly Standard, William Kristol
Posted in Bill Kristol, Congress Humor, Filibuster Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, John McCain, Judd Gregg, Legislation Humor, Mitt Romney Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Washington | 5 Comments »
Tuesday, March 16th, 2010
J.D. Hayworth, in an effort to out-wingnut John McCain in Arizona’s Senatorial primary, is claiming that legalized same-sex marriage can lead to man-horse nuptials. This is what he had to say during his Rick Santorum-like “man on dog” moment:
You see, the Massachusetts Supreme Court, when it started this move toward same-sex marriage, actually defined marriage — now get this — it defined marriage as simply, “the establishment of intimacy.” Now how dangerous is that? I mean, I don’t mean to be absurd about it, but I guess I can make the point of absurdity with an absurd point — I guess that would mean if you really had affection for your horse, I guess you could marry your horse.
Now I’m very happily married to a human male right now. But just in case it doesn’t work out, I think this is wonderful news:
Hayworth’s Marriage Menagerie (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Would you like to be wed to a cat?
Or a horse, or a dog, or a bat?
Or even an ass?
Simply move out to Mass.
Hayworth says it’s okay. So that’s that.
Tags: Animals Satire, Arizona, Bestiality Humor, Gay Marriage, Homosexuality Satire, J.D. Hayworth, John McCain, Judiciary Humor, Law Humor, Massachusetts, Nuptials Humor, Rick Santorum, Same Sex Marriage
Posted in Gay Rights, Homophobia, John McCain, Judiciary Satire, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Wingnuts | 6 Comments »
Friday, October 9th, 2009
Thirty Senate Republicans voted to keep rape victims who work for defense contractors from having their day in court. How? By voting against an Al Franken-proposed amendment to the 2010 Defense Appropriations Bill that would withhold defense contracts from companies (like Dick Cheney’s KBR) “if they restrict their employees from taking workplace sexual assault, battery and discrimination cases to court.”
Franken was inspired to sponsor this amendment by the ordeal of Jamie Leigh Jones, who was gang-raped by her co-workers while working for Halliburton/KBR in Baghdad. A clause in Jones’ KBR employment contract made employer-friendly private arbitration her only recourse, precluding Jones from seeking justice in court.
I hope all those pro-rape Republicans (listed below my limerick) are proud of themselves:
Ode To Pro-Rape Republicans (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though Republicans yearn for support
From females, they’re bound to fall short:
Their position on rape
Is in criminal shape
Cuz they treat it like less than a tort.
Here’s the list of the thirty pro-rape Republican Senators:
Lamar Alexander (R-TN) John Barrasso (R-WY) Christopher Bond (R-MO) Sam Brownback (R-KS) Jim Bunning (R-KY) Richard Burr (R-NC) Saxby Chambliss (R-GA) Tom Coburn (R-OK) Thad Cochran (R-MS) Bob Corker (R-TN) John Cornyn (R-TX) Mike Crapo (R-ID) Jim DeMint (R-SC) John Ensign (R-NV) Michael Enzi (R-WY) Lindsey Graham (R-SC) Judd Gregg (R-NH) James Inhofe (R-OK) Johnny Isakson (R-GA) Mike Johanns (R-NE) Jon Kyl (R-AZ) John McCain (R-AZ) Mitch McConnell (R-KY) James Risch (R-ID) Pat Roberts (R-KS) Jeff Sessions (R-AL) Richard Shelby (R-AL) John Thune (R-SD) David Vitter (R-LA) Roger Wicker (R-MS)
Tags: Al Franken, Appropriations Bill, Defense Contractors, Employee Lawsuits, Employment Contracts, Feminist, Halliburton, Jamie Leigh Jones, KBR, Rape Victims, Republican Senators, Sexual Assault
Posted in Al Franken, Crime, David Vitter, Dick Cheney Satire, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, GOP Humor, Inhofe Humor, James DeMint, Jeff Sessions, John Ensign, John McCain, Judd Gregg, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 10 Comments »
Friday, May 8th, 2009
Ode To Fresh Faces
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republican planning is plain.
They want to rebrand, they explain.
So on Sunday’s TV
New faces we’ll see:
Folks like Cheney and Newt and McCain.
Tags: Cheney, Face The Nation, Fox News Sunday, Gingrich, McCain, Media, Rebranding, Republican Rebranding, Stephanopoulos, Talk Shows, Television, TV
Posted in Dick Cheney Satire, Fox News Humor, GOP Humor, John McCain, Media Satire, Newt Gingrich Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Television (TV) Satire | 5 Comments »
Wednesday, November 5th, 2008
Congratulations to Senators Obama and Biden. An historic election has come to a wonderful conclusion:
Celebratory Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Obama, congrats on your win.
You have done it. You’ve won it. You’re in!
Now your job will be tough.
(Please don’t take any guff.)
Let the national healing begin!
Tags: Biden, Campaign, Celebrations, Election, History, Limericks, McCain, Obama, Verse
Posted in 44 Humor, Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Joe Biden, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Sarah Palin | 4 Comments »
Sunday, November 2nd, 2008
An Obsessive’s Lament (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Writing verse about Palin’s been fun.
But enough! I must know who has won.
Although something disturbs me,
Alarms and perturbs me:
Just what shall I do when it’s done?
Tags: Campaign, Election, Election Results, Humor, McCain, Mental Health, Obsession, Obsessives, Palin, Poem, Presidential Election, Satire, Verse, Winners
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Sarah Palin | 1 Comment »
Wednesday, October 29th, 2008
Whenever John McCain is asked about Sarah Palin’s qualifications, he falls back on the paternal-sounding (and condescending) “I couldn’t be more proud” of Palin response. But something tells me he doesn’t use the word “proud” in private:
McCain & Palin: The Not Ready For Prime Time Duo
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There’s a ticket that can’t get along
Cuz the chemistry’s totally wrong.
John may claim to be proud
Of Gov. Palin out loud.
But his eyes say, “Give Sarah the gong!”
Tags: Campaign, Election, GOP, Humor, Limericks, McCain, Palin, Presidential, Prime Time, Republicans Humor, Satire, Verse
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Republicans Humor, Sarah Palin | 1 Comment »
Monday, October 27th, 2008
I’m a bit late on this. But I was amused to read that Joe Klein has suffered the same fate as Maureen Dowd — banishment from the McCain / Palin planes:
Just Call It The McPettiness Express
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Beware of the wrath of McCain.
If you’re mean you’ll be barred from his plane.
You’ll join Klein and Mo Dowd –
That non-patriot crowd.
Wave goodbye to the “straight talk” campaign.
Tags: Campaign, Election, Humor, Joe Klein, Maureen Dowd, McCain, Media, Patriots, Pettiness, Planes, Press, Satire, Straight Talk Express, Transportation
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Sarah Palin | Comments Off
Thursday, October 23rd, 2008
After seeing Sarah Palin prance around in so much stylish, pricey-looking apparel, I wrongly assumed Alaska was so sort of fashion Mecca. But sorry, Alaska. It turns out that Palin’s $150K wardrobe hails from Saks Fifth Avenue in St. Louis and New York and Neiman Marcus in Minneapolis, all courtesy of the RNC and personal shopper Jeff Larson.
So here’s what I want to know: Does John McCain’s tax plan provide a $150K tax credit for personal shoppers?
Where’s My Personal Shopper?
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Gov. Palin, you’re taking some heat
For your clothing which, granted, is neat.
But with budgets austere
Why wear clothing so dear?
And just who are you calling elite?
Tags: Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Elite, Governor Palin, Jeff Larson, Neiman Marcus, Personal Shopper, Pricey Clothing, Republican National Committee, RNC, Saks Fifth Avenue, Sarah Palin Wardrobe, Senator McCain, Tax Credit
Posted in Campaign Humor, Economy Humor, Election Satire, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, RNC Humor, Sarah Palin, Tax & Budget Humor | 1 Comment »
Tuesday, October 21st, 2008
Cool news! Nearly 4000 people submitted haiku to the McPalin Haiku Hysteria contest held by People For The American Way and The Nation Magazine. And I’m one of the twelve finalists!!! So I’d really appreciate your voting for my haiku here. The three winning haiku will be published in The Nation.
We were allowed to submit up to three haiku, and here are the three I submitted. (The first one is the haiku that made the finals.)
Palin knows nothing
About the Constitution.
Puppets don’t have to.
An anti-choice veep
Who opposes free rape kits?
Thanks, John, but no thanks.
Would Palin court picks
Destroy the Constitution?
You betcha! Wink, wink.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Constitution Verse, Election Humor, Haiku Contest, Nation Magazine, Palin Haiku, People For The American Way, PFAW Contest
Posted in Campaign Humor, Constitution Humor, Election Satire, John McCain, News Haiku & Senryu, Political Haiku & Senryu, Political Verse, Sarah Palin | 4 Comments »
Thursday, October 16th, 2008
Sarcastic air-quotes around “health” in “health of the mother”? Who the hell uses sarcastic air-quotes anymore … let alone when referring to women’s health? Big mistake, Senator McCain!
Which reminds me — during last night’s debate I had a revelation about the gravitas-test versus the guy-you’d-enjoy-having-a-beer-with-test. In this year’s election, gravitas-guy (Obama) is also the fellow I’d enjoy having a beer with … if only I liked beer:
Ode To John “Air-Quotes” McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Many voters ask: Whose views are best,
As opposed to the drinking-pal test.
But whichever the measure,
Obama’s my pleasure.
McCain? He’s a cranky old pest.
Tags: Air Quotes, Campaign Satire, Debate Limerick, Drinking Pals, Election Humor, McCain Verse, Mother's Health, Obama poem, Presidential Election, Sarcasm, Women's Health
Posted in Abortion Rights, Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, Health Satire, John McCain, Social Satire | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, October 14th, 2008
My mother-in-law
Thinks Obama is Muslim —
Likes McCain. Oy vey!
Tags: McCain Verse, Mothers-in-law Humor, Muslim Haiku, Obama Haiku, Relatives Humor, Yiddish Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, General Humor, John McCain, News Haiku & Senryu | Comments Off
Sunday, October 12th, 2008
A bipartisan legislative panel in Alaska finds Sarah Palin guilty of abusing her executive power. So is Palin contrite? Hahahahaha!
Actually, I’m find it tough to get my head around Palin’s response. (Unlike so many Republicans, I’ve never been any good at holding two contradictory positions at the same time.)
Republican vice presidential candidate Sarah Palin this weekend disregarded an ethics investigator’s finding that she had abused her executive power as Alaska’s governor and instead embraced a second finding in the report to say that she had been cleared of wrongfully firing her state public safety commissioner. …
In a Saturday conference call with Alaska journalists, Palin said she was “pleased to be cleared of any legal wrongdoing … any hint of any kind of unethical activity there.” She denounced the investigation, calling it “a partisan circus.” …
Okay, I’m not positive, but here’s what seems to be the McCain campaign’s official response to the Troopergate ethics violation report:
1) It exonerates her; and
2) If it hadn’t been an Obama-controlled hit job, it would have exonerated her.
My head hurts.
Sarah In Wonderland
By Madeleine Begun Kane
So what is Gov. Palin’s excuse
For the finding of power abuse?
She pretends it ain’t there,
While she claims it ain’t fair,
With the facts playing games, fast and loose.
Tags: Abuse of Executive Power, Alaska Ethics Violation, Campaign Satire, Election Humor, Governor Palin, McCain Campaign, Presidential Election, Troopergate
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Law Satire, Legal Limericks, Political Commentary, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Sarah Palin | 1 Comment »
Thursday, October 9th, 2008
Team Of Liars
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The McCain/Palin team now is rife
With liars, including John’s wife.
So it’s surely no shock
They’re defaming Barack.
As McCain might say: John, get a life!
Tags: Campaign Satire, Cindy McCain, Defamation, Election Humor, Governor Palin, Obama Verse, Presidential Campaign Humor, Senator McCain
Posted in Barack Obama, Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, John McCain, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Sarah Palin | 8 Comments »
A Tragic Limerick Ode To John McCain
Sunday, December 19th, 2010If John McCain hadn’t done quite so much damage to our nation, I could almost feel sorry for him. After all, it’s hard not to pity a man who’s turned into a pathetic shell of a human being.
McCain’s Don’t Ask Don’t Tell repeal temper tantrum is only the latest example of the sad, ugly person that McCain’s become:
A Tragic Limerick Ode To John McCain
By Madeleine Begun Kane
John McCain seems embittered and mean,
Acting worse than a badly raised teen.
His convictions? No more!
Just conniptions galore.
He’s lost heart, and he’s left with just spleen.
Tags: DADT, John McCain, Military, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate
Posted in Don't Ask Don't Tell Humor, Gay Rights, John McCain, Legislation Humor, Military Humor, National Security Humor, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Publicity Hounds, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire | 7 Comments »