The Donald’s been tweeting up a storm over the probe of Trump’s Russia connections.
“Any claims about Russia and me
Are a hoax” — Donald’s latest tweet-spree.
“It’s Hill you should probe!”
Was he wearing a robe
When he threw up this Twitter debris?
Trump was having a rather good week this past week … until he wasn’t.
So, what ruined Trump’s Congressional address high? No, NOT being wiretapped by Obama. That’s just some shit Trump made up and threw up on Twitter.
No, here’s what REALLY angered Trump: Attorney General Jeff Sessions having to recuse himself from the Russia investigation, because he lied under oath regarding his own Russian contacts. Hence, my limerick:
Trump’s dismayed, overwrought, feeling frayed;
He’d been waiting for Sessions to aid
Him with Russia, and thought
That a fixer’d been bought.
Jeff’s recusal has nixed that charade.
In the last couple of days, Trump’s been tweet-storming complaints about Senators McCain and Blumenthal, as well as Nordstrom.
So, what’s Trump outraged about (besides the media and the courts?)
1) Sen. McCain criticized Trump’s disastrous Yemen raid.
2) Sen. Blumenthal accurately quoted Judge Gorsuch’s relatively mild criticism of Trump’s anti-judge tweets.
3) Nordstrom dropped Ivanka’s clothing and shoe lines because they aren’t selling well.
How dare they!
Meanwhile, where’s Trump’s outrage at Kellyanne Conway over her blatant violation of federal ethics regulations? Where’s the angry Trump tweet condemning Conway for illegally hawking Ivanka’s products from the White House on a Fox News interview?
Conway’s breach was so egregious, that it was even strongly condemned by Republican Chairman of the House Oversight Committee Jason Chaffetz:
“That was wrong, wrong, wrong,” Chaffetz told NBC News’ Alex Moe. “It is wholly unacceptable — no if, ands or buts about it.” Chaffetz said that he was drafting a bipartisan letter with his Democratic counterpart Elijah Cummings demanding an explanation from the White House.
Yet all we’ve gotten so far is a namby-pamby statement by Sean Spicer, that Trump Counselor Conway “has been counseled.”
John McCain’s raid-remarks made Trump mad.
So did Blumenthal’s Gorsuch quotes. Sad!
Yet Donald seems fine
When his aides cross the line,
As with Conway’s Ivanka-brand ad.
It’s simple enough to avoid Judge Sonia Sotomayor smear-tweets like these:
White man racist nominee would be forced to withdraw. Latina woman racist should also withdraw.
Imagine a judicial nominee said “my experience as a white man makes me better than a latina woman” new racism is no better than old racism.
Just be sure not to follow Newt Gingrich’s Twitter feed.
If only it were as easy to dodge Newt on TV, in print, and on the Net.
And that brings me to my latest song parody, which you can sing to Hark! The Herald Angels Sing:
Hark! The Disgraced Former Speaker Speaks.
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Hark! The former Speaker speaks.
Headlines, Speaker Gingrich seeks.
News cos eagerly come through.
They don’t care his claims ain’t true.
Gleefully he airs his lies,
Spreading venom, media buys.
Watch the ousted Newt proclaim,
Sonia is just a racist dame.
Darkly, Gingrich spews his views.
Can’t avoid him on the news.
Mystified about Twitter? Wondering what the tweet fuss is all about? Desperate to find out what words of wisdom you’ve missed by ignoring the Political Twittersphere?
Well, your worries are over. Because I’m launching (as a public service) the Political Twittersphere Words of Wisdom. Here’s my first selection of recent, genuine, and attributed tweet quotes:
“trying to explain to junior white house staffers that mickey rourke was once young handsome and supercool.” @jaketapper
“tweeting about twitter no longer meta, now oafish. starting…..NOW.” @jaketapper
“My intvu with Gov. Huntsman. He says GOP needs ‘bold solutions’ instead of ‘gratuitous political griping.'” @NorahODonnell
“I’m at Chef Geoff’s eating the most delicious meal ever of bucatini and veal meatballs. Can u say garlic?” @NorahODonnell
“So @algore makes cut w/ 12 tweets since Nov? And I didn’t even know @chuckgrassley existed. But we’re talking so @thepolitico wins.” @williambeutler
“Bombay. It should be called Bombay, dammit. #oscars” @williambeutler
“you would think that our largest affiliate could actually put us on the air before the 1st segment ends. grrrrr.” @Radioblogger (Senior producer of the Hugh Hewitt Show)
“All GOP governors will take most of the money. Otherwise, they’re taxing their residents for states that didn’t control spending.” @KarlRove
“query: once all the newspapers are gone, what happens during an internet outage?” @craig_crawford
“Why is Gibbs tie distracting me? Perhaps that’s the point since he’s having to talk about cutting entitlements.” @craig_crawford
“Choreography at White House fiscal event is interesting: Obama calls on McCain, Cantor, etc Maybe he’s serious abt this bipartisanship stuff.” @TerryMoran
“Feeling kind of defeated in my shabby attempts to pretend to cover the WH. Do I need to sip from the Potomac more? Or less?” @anamariecox
“Cosi across the street from the WH is like an annex. Two other journos here, Secret Service guy just got a chicken salad to go.” @anamariecox
Well, that’s it for the first edition of Political Twittersphere Words of Wisdom. Please let me know if I should make this a regular feature. Oh … and if you’d like to follow me on Twitter I’m @MadKane.