Posts Tagged ‘Hillary Clinton’

Poor Trump: The Mics Are Rigged Against Him (Limerick)

Thursday, October 27th, 2016

Ever wonder what Trump does for a hobby? Apparently he bitches about microphones:

Donald Trump amplified his contentious history with microphones Thursday, blaming the technology for recording what he thought he was saying in private.

In an interview set to air Thursday, Trump faulted a hot mic for capturing him speaking cavalierly about forcibly kissing and groping women with impunity because he’s ‘a star.’

‘The microphones, I mean to be honest should, you know, should never have been on,’ he said, according to an excerpt of an interview scheduled to broadcast Thursday evening with the global Catholic network EWTN and published by The Washington Post.

Trump’s revealed who is really at fault
For his infamous brags of assault.
Donald’s mic is to blame
For his “pussy” boast fame.
Trump’s a media pro? Oy gevalt!

Down-Market Donald (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 26th, 2016

Here’s some news that has cheered me a bit:
Donald’s branding has taken a hit.
The elite who can pay
His steep rates, now say “Nay!”
So Trump’s “luxury” name ain’t worth spit.

Going To Town About The Election (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 25th, 2016

This election is nearing its end
None too soon; I’ve gone plumb round the bend.
I can’t handle more jive.
My mind’s taken a dive.
It needs Hillary’s village to mend.

Trump “Bronx Cheered” In Manhattan (Limerick)

Friday, October 21st, 2016

At a charity, heckling is rare,
But Trump got derision to spare
At the Alfred Smith Dinner.
Trump wasn’t the winner?
“Rigged” booing, no doubt. How unfair!

Limerick Ode To Losing “Bigly”

Thursday, October 20th, 2016

Donald lost the debate rather “bigly.”
The jig’s up, Mr. “Bigwig.” Your prigly
And pigly deportment
And oddball assortment
Of views “rigged the deal” … and I’m giggly.

Limerick Ode To Donald “Sore Loser” Trump

Tuesday, October 18th, 2016

It’s all “rigged,” Donald’s loudly contended;
Childish whining, before the game’s ended.
What’s his proof? Trump has none!
He’s undone his own run
Through behavior that can’t be defended.

But to Donald, he’s never to blame;
Not his lies, nor his predator fame
Could ever account
For the polls, as they mount
Against Trump and his Alt-Rightist game.

When Exactly Was Trump Shackled? (Limerick)

Wednesday, October 12th, 2016

Does anyone remember Donald Trump being shackled? Me neither.

And yet here’s Trump on Twitter: “It is so nice that the shackles have been taken off me and I can now fight for America the way I want to.”

It’s time for a two-verse limerick. (5 Lines just aren’t enough.)

Now that Trump’s been “unshackled,” beware:
Donald’s free to be mean as a bear.
Trump the “gentleman’s” done.
Trump the tough guy’s begun;
That’s his threat in an effort to scare.

But this taunt leaves me rather amused,
Because Donald has constantly oozed
Spiteful bile on the stump.
Trump has ALWAYS been Trump,
Spewing lies that are venom-infused.

Trump Gropes For A Distraction (Limerick)

Sunday, October 9th, 2016

The debaters are poised for the kill.
(I’m referring to Donald and Hill.)
Here’s the answer we need:
Will The Donald succeed
In changing the villain to Bill?

Limerick Ode To A Sorry Apology

Saturday, October 8th, 2016

Trump’s “pussy” apology’s terse!
(The Donald is “sorry” averse.)
“You should give me your votes,”
He shamelessly notes.
“Elect ME, cuz her husband’s done worse.”

Looking At The Lookist (Limerick)

Thursday, September 29th, 2016

Donald swallowed Hill’s fat-shaming bait,
Which made him enraged and irate.
So he keeps lashing back
And confirms with each whack
That at lookism, Donald is great.

Going Mental (Limerick)

Sunday, September 25th, 2016

I keep pacing, and ev’rything’s grating.
I barely can handle the waiting.
I’m shaky and dazed.
My mental state’s crazed.
How fortunate I’M not debating!

Transparency Madness (Limerick)

Thursday, September 15th, 2016

Trump’s demands of opponents are vast;
Full disclosure, or else he’s aghast:
Proof of birth, health, and files
From their schools and huge piles
Of their emails, each speech. Do it fast!

But want data from Donald? You chump!
Don’t expect any document dump
Of his taxes and health
Or his “billions” in wealth;
Full disclosure’s for folks Not-Named-Trump.

Trump Wrote Another Limerick!

Sunday, August 14th, 2016

The media’s biased, ill-bred,
And in bed with that crook who’s ahead.
If I lose, it’s the press
Who’s at fault for my mess.
How dare they report what I’ve said!

For Trump, Election Rigging is De Rigueur

Saturday, August 13th, 2016

Trump Headline of the Day: “I’ll Only Lose With ‘Cheating,’ Asks Supporters To Watch Polling Places.”

As I explain in my 2-verse limerick, Trump’s urging supporters to intimidate Democratic voters:

In a nutshell, here’s Donald’s j’accuse:
“Only cheating can cause me to lose.
“Stop those people (sub-par) –
“You all know who they are –
“From stealing what’s mine.” What a ruse!

Don’t be fooled by the Trumpian spin.
Calls for action like that are a sin;
He’s encouraging fans
To make bullying plans,
Cuz it’s CHEATING Trump NEEDS for a WIN.

Yet Another Trump Limerick

Friday, August 12th, 2016

Trump’s speeches are vile and bombastic,
With fantastical falsehoods so drastic,
That he crosses the line,
Which for Trump is just fine.
His defense? “I was being sarcastic.”

Trump’s Killer of a Message (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 9th, 2016

Donald Trump in the Oval Office? Imprisonment for threatening a fellow presidential candidate seems more appropriate to me.

Trump’s gun-loving supporters knew exactly what Trump meant, when he said this:

If she gets to pick her judges, nothing you can do folks. Although the Second Amendment people, maybe there is, I don’t know.

Did you hear the vile message Trump sent?
To the gun owners, here’s what he meant:
If Trump’s beaten by Hill,
Then their gun rights are nil–
Something only her death can prevent.

Delusional Donald (Limerick)

Tuesday, August 9th, 2016

Will Delusional Donald debate?
Well of course, so folks see that he’s “great.”
Though he plays hard to get
With “conditions,” I’ll bet
He can’t wait; he’s so sure of his fate.

Donald’s Already Lying About Debates (Limerick)

Saturday, July 30th, 2016

I suspect that The Donald is scared
That his knowledge-lack’s sure to be bared
In a Clinton debate.
Hence his tale out the gate:
“Clinton rigged the debate dates,” he blared.

Putin and Me, a Limerick by Donald Trump

Thursday, July 28th, 2016

Are you confused by the Trump/Putin relationship? The Donald has helpfully written us this limerick:

Meet Putin? I did not … or did.
No one hacked, just to help with my bid.
But what a great plan!
Hey Putin, my man,
Hack those emails that Hillary hid.

Open Limerick To Bernie Sanders

Monday, July 25th, 2016

Dear Bernie, I hope you’ll succeed
In persuading supporters to heed
All your “real world” advice.
If you fail, our steep price
Is a probable Trumped-up stampede.