Archive for the ‘CIA Satire’ Category

I Spy Hypocrisy (Limerick)

Thursday, March 13th, 2014

Some of the USA’s most ardent defenders of our ever-growing surveillance state (Lindsey Graham, Diane Feinstein, John McCain) are suddenly up in arms about domestic spying. Why? Cuz this time it’s PERSONAL!

For instance:

In response to accusations that the Central Intelligence Agency has snooped on Senate computers, Graham went bonkers, telling reporters on Tuesday that “Heads should roll, people should go to jail if it’s true.”

I Spy Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though Senators failed to condemn
Our rampant surveillance, or stem
All the government spying,
They’re suddenly crying,
Cuz the CIA’s spying on the THEM!

The Press Laid Bare (Limerick)

Wednesday, November 14th, 2012

I’ve been trying to ignore the David Petraeus, John Allen, Jill Kelley, Paula Broadwell, shirtless FBI agent brouhaha. But it’s really hard to avoid.

The Press Laid Bare (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Juicy emails! Illicit affair!
FBI guy whose chest is quite bare!
In gen’ral the press,
Now bored with our mess,
Prefers fare with a sexual flair.

The “We Did Nothing Wrong, & Nancy Should Have Stopped Us” Song

Saturday, May 16th, 2009

Republicans are truly gifted at changing the subject, and the media falls for it every time. Take CIA torture, for instance. Is the media focusing on who in the Bush administration broke the law and ordered torture? Of course not! Instead, the topic’s morphed into whether Nancy Pelosi is lying when she says the CIA misled Congress about torture.

Following Republican logic is never an easy task. But from what I can gather, here’s the Republican position: Bush’s CIA did nothing wrong, & Pelosi could have and should have stopped them.

In honor of the Republicans tortured position on torture, I’ve written them a theme song to the tune of Stephen Foster’s Camptown Races:

The “We Did Nothing Wrong, & Nancy Should Have Stopped Us” Song
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The CIA did nothing wrong.
Doo-da, Doo-da.
Pelosi knew and went along.
Oh, de doo-da day.

Torture is always right.
Torture can make our day.
And Nancy’s nothing but a lying nag.
She could have got in the way.

Interrogation must be tough.
Doo-da, Doo-da.
Pelosi knew we got too rough.
Oh, de doo-da day.

Never did break no laws.
Torture? Who, us? No way!
Pelosi’s nothing but a lying hag.
Nancy would lead you astray.

The CIA protects us all.
Doo-da, Doo-da.
It’s time Pelosi took the fall.
Oh, de doo-da day.

Torture was never done.
Torture is lots of fun.
And Nancy’s nothing but a lying nag.
Nancy Pelosi should pay.

My Homage To Feigned Outrage

Thursday, May 14th, 2009

Republicans (and Joe Lieberman) have been staging yet another temper tantrum. What’s their grievance du jour? Speaker Nancy Pelosi said CIA leaders misled Congress about interrogation techniques.

My Homage To Feigned Outrage
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The CIA’s under attack
By the Speaker who gave it a smack.
She accused it of lying.
The GOP’s crying:
She’s mean and must take it all back.

Unfair Censorship Of Plame’s Fair Game

Thursday, October 25th, 2007

The defendants in Valerie Plame Wilson’s lawsuit against the CIA for censoring her book, Fair Game, had better hope she never gets to trial.  I say that because I’ve heard her interviewed several times, and that woman will make one hell of a witness.

Moreover, asserting national security, in order to censor material that’s already in the public domain, sure sounds like revenge censorship to me.

And that brings me to my latest haiku:

Plame’s book censored by
Bush blackguards, who black out truths
Already revealed.

(You can find my Traitorgate song parody about Valerie Plame’s outing here.) [tags]Valerie Plame Wilson, Outing CIA Agent, Fair Game, Plame Censorship, Plame Lawsuit[/tags]