Posts Tagged ‘Lindsey Graham’

What Can They Be Thinking? (2-Verse Limerick)

Thursday, July 30th, 2015

What Can They Be Thinking? (2-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Gilmore’s entered the race. What a snore!
(Does the GOP really need MORE?)
Sixteen guys and one gal–
Most with no rationale
For believing they’ll get to the fore.

Just what keeps them all willing to stump,
As their poll numbers tumble and slump?
While they stand at the brink,
I suppose most pols think:
“I must surely be better than Trump!”

Too Bad The Donald Can’t Be Docked For Doxing (Limerick)

Tuesday, July 21st, 2015

Not that I’m a fan of Sen. Lindsey Graham, but Trump’s giving Graham’s private cell phone number out to the public is disgusting! I wish someone would do the same with Trump’s number, giving him a taste of his own caddish medicine.

And please don’t tell me two wrongs don’t make a right. Donald Trump deserves that and much more … including this limerick:

Lindsey Graham must buy a new cell;
He’s been doxed into mean-caller hell
By the Donald, who thinks
All opponents are finks,
Deserving a Trump “diss and tell.”

Conservatives Race To Alter Race-Crime Reality (Limerick)

Friday, June 19th, 2015

Conservatives Race To Alter Race-Crime Reality
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When a racist whose head’s out of whack
Kills nine churchgoers just cuz they’re black,
Wingnuts lay it on thick
With a claim that’s just sick:
“Christian freedom is under attack.”

Right-wing culprits in this outrageous distortion of the Charleston church massacre include Rick Santorum, Jeb Bush, Lindsey Graham, and sundry Fox News hosts.

Open Limerick To Lindsey Graham

Wednesday, March 25th, 2015

You’re just not gonna believe who’s to blame for GOP inaction on climate change.

According to Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC), it’s Al Gore’s fault.

Here’s Graham: “the problem is Al Gore’s turned this thing into religion. You know, climate change is not a religious problem for me, it’s an economic, it is an environmental problem.”

Open Limerick To Lindsey Graham
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Lindsey, you’re loony — full-bore;
Only nuts would lay blame on Al Gore
For the GOP’s ’tude
About climate change, dude.
Who’s at fault? It’s your Dem-hating corps.

Open Limerick to Lindsey Graham

Wednesday, March 11th, 2015

Senator Lindsey Graham actually bragged that he never uses email because he’s too busy thinking through problems.

Open Limerick to Lindsey Graham
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If you never use email, that’s great,
Lindsey Graham, but please don’t conflate
It with being a thinker.
You’re naught but an inker,
Sticking staff with the crap on your plate.

I Spy Hypocrisy (Limerick)

Thursday, March 13th, 2014

Some of the USA’s most ardent defenders of our ever-growing surveillance state (Lindsey Graham, Diane Feinstein, John McCain) are suddenly up in arms about domestic spying. Why? Cuz this time it’s PERSONAL!

For instance:

In response to accusations that the Central Intelligence Agency has snooped on Senate computers, Graham went bonkers, telling reporters on Tuesday that “Heads should roll, people should go to jail if it’s true.”

I Spy Hypocrisy (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Though Senators failed to condemn
Our rampant surveillance, or stem
All the government spying,
They’re suddenly crying,
Cuz the CIA’s spying on the THEM!

Rice Madness (Limerick)

Thursday, November 29th, 2012

Republican Senators John McCain, Lindsey Graham and Kelly Ayotte have a seemingly irrational vendetta against U.N. Ambassador Susan Rice, centering on Benghazi. What explains it? Well, Rachel Maddow has a fascinating theory, which Mark Karlin buys, as do I.

Here’s how the theory works:

1) Republicans are lusting after John Kerry’s Senate seat, eying it for soon-to-be ex-Senator Scott Brown.

2) Kerry and Rice are the only contenders for Secretary of State.

3) If Kerry gets State, he has to give up his seat, and Brown has a good shot at winning a special election to replace him.

4) Rice is standing in Kerry’s way, so she must be eliminated by the McCain/Graham/Ayotte trio.

In other words:

Rice Madness (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

If Obama gives State to John Kerry
The GOP’s bound to be merry:
Scott Brown can then run
For John’s seat. Oh what fun!
This explains why they’ll Susan Rice bury.