Archive for the ‘Appearance Humor’ Category

“Midlife Crisis” FLOTUS-Style (Limerick)

Tuesday, February 19th, 2013

Michelle Obama addressed the burning question of her bangs on the Rachael Ray Show:

“This is my midlife crisis, the bangs. I couldn’t get a sports car,” she told Ray about the inspiration for her trendy new look. “They won’t let me bungee jump. So instead, I cut my bangs.”

“Midlife Crisis” FLOTUS-Style (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“How dare you get bangs,” they harangue.
Michelle laughs at the Sturm and the Drang:
Bungee jumping was out.
So’s a sports car, no doubt.
So she changed up her “do” with a bang.

Harry Reid’s Not So Hot Remark

Tuesday, September 21st, 2010

When it comes to sexism posing as a compliment, I try to cut Harry Reid’s generation some slack. But Senator Reid really ought to know better:

Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid had an unusual form of praise for New York’s junior senator, Kirsten Gillibrand, this morning at the fundraiser Mayor Bloomberg hosted for him at his townhouse – referring to her as “the hottest member” as she sat just a few feet away, according to three sources.

The comment prompted Gillibrand to turn red, according to the sources, and created a bit of stir among the small crowd there.

That leads me to my latest limerick:

Harry Reid’s Not So Hot Remark
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Kirsten Gillibrand’s hot says Sen. Reid —
The Sen’s “hottest member,” indeed.
Now I know Harry’s old,
And I don’t mean to scold,
But that “compliment’s” sexist. Take heed.

Here’s more on subtle sexism, including my Gender At Work essay. (Gender at Work, under the name My Most Attractive Adversary, is the lead Gender Gap chapter essay in a pair of college textbooks by Gary Goshgarian: The Contemporary Reader and Readings For Today.)

Ode To The White House Fashion Police

Friday, August 21st, 2009

The White House fashion police are at it again: First Lady Michelle Obama was caught wearing shorts on her way to a Grand Canyon vacation! The horror!

Ode To The White House Fashion Police (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Once again I just can’t help but frown
At the journalists going to town:
“The First Lady wore shorts,”
Blare the breathless reports.
Please Michelle, when you hike wear a gown.

Related Post: Dear Maureen Dowd, I Don’t Like Your Tone

Dear Maureen Dowd, I Don’t Like Your Tone

Sunday, March 22nd, 2009

I’d hoped that Maureen Dowd was all done with her Michelle Obama biceps obsession. But apparently not. In her latest column, Dowd insinuates that Michelle’s “sinewy arms” belong in the Oval.

Dear Maureen Dowd, I Don’t Like Your Tone
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Maureen, please I’m begging, enough!
Yes, the First Lady’s biceps are buff.
But I really don’t need
To constantly read
About “sinewy arms.” Stop the fluff!

Rudy Giuliani: Bald Ego

Thursday, September 20th, 2007

I don’t mean to cast aspersions on short people.  (I’m only five foot zero myself.)  But I have a totally unsubstantiated theory, and here it is: Republican politicians are, on average, shorter than Democratic politicians.  (Can you think of a better explanation for the over-compensating machismo and braggadocio that run rampant throughout the Republican party?)

Case in point: Rudy “Bald Ego” Giuliani, who out-did himself Wednesday during his European tour

LONDON – Republican presidential candidate Rudy Giuliani bragged about his international celebrity Wednesday on a trans-Atlantic campaign trip in which he schmoozed with conservative idol Margaret Thatcher.

“I’m probably one of the four or five best known Americans in the world,” Giuliani told a small group of reporters at a posh London hotel as onlookers gathered in the lobby to gawk at actor Dustin Hoffman who was on a separate visit.

And that leads me to my latest haiku:

The Rudy Complex
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Giuliani brags
About how famous he is.
Like Napoleon?

So who’s ready to fund my “Are Republicans Shorter Than Democrats” study?  Nobody?  How about my “Are Republicans Balder Than Democrats” study?  [tags]GOP Braggart, Mayor Rudy Guiliani, Overcompensation, Republican Humor, Height, Macho Politicians[/tags]

Fox on Bush

Monday, September 17th, 2007

In his new book, Revolution of Hope: The Life, Faith, and Dreams of a Mexican President, former Mexican President Vicente Fox had this to say about George W. Bush:

The cockiest guy I have ever met in my life.

I’m guessing he’s seen Bush in his “Mission Accomplished” gear. [tags]Mission Accomplished Humor, Vicente Fox, Mexico President, Political Memoirs, Cocky Bush, Revolution Of Hope[/tags]

Mustachioed Men — Downtrodden Minority Group? (Updated — Limerick Revised)

Saturday, September 1st, 2007

Is  the American Mustache Institute (AMI) for real? When I first read about it, I figured it must surely be fictitious.  Either that  … or John Bolton’s new employer. But the AMI, a sort of mustache anti-defamation league, apparently does exist, with this as its stated goal:

To battle negative stereotyping that has accompanied the mustache since those glory years of the 1970s – the peak of mustache acceptance – fighting to create a climate of acceptance, understanding, flavor saving, and upper lip warmth for all mustached Americans alike.

I think the American Mustache Institute deserves a limerick don’t you?

Ode to Mustached Men, The Forgotten Minority
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Ending prejudice—that’s the group’s aim.
“Don’t be bigots!” its members exclaim.
What’s the bias they face?
Not their age, faith or race—
Anti-mustache behavior’s to blame.