Archive for March, 2011

Limerick Ode To Donald Birther Trump

Wednesday, March 30th, 2011

Limerick Ode To Donald Birther Trump
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I once met a man, Donald Trump,
In my lawyering days — what a lump!
This was long, long ago —
Way before his big show.
He’s no brighter while out on the stump.

Author’s Note: Yes, I really did encounter Donald Trump decades ago, early in my legal career. And no, I don’t really believe Trump will run for U.S. president. But he’s certainly on the stump … for publicity. And if you want to read about Trump’s increasingly malevolent dive into Birther-politics here’s the latest from Political Wire.

That Newt’s A Beaut (Limerick)

Friday, March 25th, 2011

I have very mixed feelings about Obama’s handling of Libya and U.S. involvement in military operations against Muammar Gaddafi’s Libya. But unlike Newt Gingrich, I don’t routinely contradict myself on the topic, while pretending to think about running for president.

That Newt’s A Beaut
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Newt Gingrich is caught in a bind
Cuz he can’t resist changing his mind.
Unable to choose
From his Libyan views,
He’s had lots of them — all ill-defined.

There’s a method behind Newt’s mad song:
It’s condemning Obama as wrong.
If Obama should do
What Newt counsels, on cue
Mister Newt to that view says “So long.”

Republican Priorities

Monday, March 21st, 2011

Republican Priorities
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Shall we immunize children? Heck no!
Supply food to the starving? No go!
Cuz Republicans say
That we’re broke ev’ry day,
As they help out the rich on skid row.

Brace For Another Pounding From Pound-Foolish Policies

Thursday, March 17th, 2011

Ezra Klein makes some good points about Republicans and their penny-wise and pound-foolish budget-slashing:

There are three categories of spending in which cuts lead to more, rather than less, spending down the line, says Alice Rivlin, former director of both the Congressional Budget Office and the Office of Management and Budget. Inspection, enforcement and maintenance. The GOP is trying to cut all three.

This is no surprise coming from Republicans who worship at the altar of Ronald Reagan. After all, back in 1989 the GAO had plenty to say about the damage done by Reagan’s short-sighted cutbacks:

Charles Bowsher, head of the General Accounting Office, told Congress yesterday that Reagan-era budget cuts created a climate of lax oversight and mismanagement. He said Reagan’s effort to save some money through budget cuts is likely to cost another $150 billion in the 1990s.

“We have been penny wise and really pound foolish,” Bowsher said.

That leads me to my latest limerick:

Brace For Another Pounding From Pound-Foolish Policies
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Preventative spending is wise —
Lessens risk that disasters arise —
Forestalls flooding and fraud,
Outbreaks, tragedy broad.
Cut such spending? Huge costs in disguise.

Broken Priorities (Limerick)

Monday, March 14th, 2011

Steve Benen has some great comments about Republicans and their hypocritical “we’re broke” weaponry:

In December, when Republicans wanted an $858 billion tax-cut package, we weren’t broke. How much of that package did the GOP suggest we pay for? None of it. Not one penny. The costs were simply added to the deficit, and are the driving force behind the rising deficit estimates for this year, which have sent the right into such hysteria.

But now we’re so broke, we’re told, that we have no choice but to make brutal cuts to education, medical research, infrastructure, job training, and national security, all of which is projected to cost the economy hundreds of thousands of jobs.

Broken Priorities (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Republicans claim that we’re broke,
But you know that they’re just blowing smoke.
Help Big Oil and the rich?
Then they pull a big switch,
And our budget’s no longer a yoke.

Newt’s Fishy Excuses

Thursday, March 10th, 2011

Have you ever answered a “what’s your worst fault” question from a prospective employer by mentioning a positive trait?

Newt Gingrich is apparently familiar with that technique. What else can explain the excuses he gave for having been unfaithful to two sick wives? It seems his infidelity was “partially driven by how passionately [he] felt about this country” and the fact that he “worked far too hard.”

So, you ready to hire him for the next White House opening? What about dog catcher?

Newt’s Fishy Excuses
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Mr. Newt has an oddball excuse
For something that’s close to abuse:
Abandoning wives
Who were ill just derives
From his working too hard? How obtuse!

(More Newt Gingrich humor here.)

Weirdness From George Will

Tuesday, March 8th, 2011

I almost always disagree with George Will. So it pains me to say this, but George Will is right. I’m referring, of course, to Will’s column lamenting the Republican 2012 presidential prospects — more specifically, the “vibrations of weirdness emanating from people associated with the party.” He illustrates his column with recent Mike Huckabee and Newt Gingrich shenanigans. And he doesn’t sound all that thrilled with the rest of the Republican pack.

That brings me to my latest limerick:

Weirdness from George Will
By Madeleine Begun Kane

George Will wrote a column with bite
On the GOP president fight.
He finds weirdness within
The candidate din.
Had to happen one day — Will is right.

Run, Newt, Run!

Thursday, March 3rd, 2011

Oh goody — Newt Gingrich is exploring the possibility of maybe, conceivably running for president. Either that, or it’s yet another of his book publicity stunts:

Run, Newt, Run! (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear Newt, I don’t care if you run—
Changed my mind — a Newt run would be fun.
Your divorces and scams
And your ethical jams—
I can’t wait to see just how they’re spun.

(More Newt Gingrich humor here.)

Limerick Ode To Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker

Thursday, March 3rd, 2011

I wrote this when the story of the Scott Walker / David Koch prank phone call first broke. But then I somehow forgot to post it. So a belated bravo to Ian Murphy of the Buffalo Beast for playing that entertaining and enlightening stunt on Scott “Union Buster” Walker. And now, at last, my limerick:

Limerick Ode To Wisconsin Governor Walker
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Gov. Walker has fallen afoul
Of a prank that made Democrats howl.
He lengthily spoke
To a pseudo Dave Koch,
Spouting schemes that make honest folk scowl.

Political Haiku Quartet

Tuesday, March 1st, 2011

Styrofoam is back.
“Green the Capitol” is gone.
Job, jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs?


Rotund Rush Limbaugh
says Michelle Obama’s fat—
that’s hard to swallow.


Freedom from taxes
demanded by those who crave
what taxes give them.


The mental midget
mentioned an affinity
with Rush — no surprise.


Showing up to vote—
a yearly exercise in
unrequited hope.


(More political haiku here. And more Rush Limbaugh humor here.)