Posts Tagged ‘Employment’

White House Diversity’s Owed (Limerick)

Thursday, January 10th, 2013

I have nothing against white guys. (Some of my best husbands are white guys.) But President Obama’s second term appointments are really starting to annoy me.

White House Diversity’s Owed (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Where’s Obama’s diversity minder–
His “qualified female” staff finder?
He’s named white guys galore
To positions top-drawer.
Perhaps he should borrow Mitt’s binder.

Shadowy Mitt Romney (With Apologies To Robert Louis Stevenson)

Thursday, October 18th, 2012

Shadowy Mitt Romney (With Apologies To Robert Louis Stevenson)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I have a little binder that is filled with clever gals,
But what can be the use of them — I’ll have to ask my pals.
They are very, very diff’rent. They are poor, and I am rich.
And I make them jump before me. They refuse, then they’re a bitch.

The funniest thing about them is the way they do their jobs.
Not at all like proper workers, such as Teds and Gregs and Bobs.
And they sometimes shoot up taller while they’re asking for a raise.
But to me they’re always little, barely worth my regal gaze.

They haven’t got a notion of how peons ought to work.
I can always make a fool of them — my second-fav’rite perk.
They long to stay beside me. But I wonder if they’re dykes.
Yet they shamefully leave early. They must feed their spouse and tykes.

One morning very early, before the sun was up
I rose and said, “You’re fired!” Why? They never made me sup.
Then I found another binder to replace those vacant spots:
A tome that’s filled with women — desp’rate feminine have-nots.

(Related Post: Limerick Ode To Lady-Filled Binders)

(Linked at DVerse Poets Pub)

Limerick Ode To Lady-Filled Binders

Wednesday, October 17th, 2012

The oddest line of last night’s presidential debate has to be Mitt Romney’s “binders full of women.”

Romney used that phrase when responding to a question about gender inequality in the workplace: He claimed that he’d proactively solicited such binders in order to staff his cabinet with women.

“…we took a concerted effort to go out and find women who had backgrounds that could be qualified to become members of our cabinet.

“I went to a number of women’s groups and said, ‘Can you help us find folks,’ and they brought us whole binders full of women.”

Even if Mitt’s claim were true, which apparently it isn’t, this begs the question: Was Romney the Massachusetts Governor … or running an escort service?

Limerick Ode To Lady-Filled Binders
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Romney goes through his life wearing blinders
And surrounded by yes-men and minders.
I suppose this explains
Why Romney’s campaign’s
So proud of his women-filled binders.

Ode To Mitt “I like being able to fire people” Romney

Tuesday, January 10th, 2012

By now you’ve surely seen Mitt Romney’s “I like being able to fire people” video clip.

Ode To Mitt “I like being able to fire people” Romney
By Madeleine Begun Kane

“I like … to fire people,”
Said Mitt Romney, with a smile.
This quote, while out-of-context,
Will be sure to irk and rile.

And well it should: The pleasure
Mitt conveys with eyes aglow
Reveals that Mitt seems happy
Telling people, “Time to go.”

No doubt he’ll claim unfairness:
He meant those who’d earned his boot,
And ads that use this sound bite
Are misleading.
What a hoot!

Mitt Romney’s out-of-context ads
Are packed with sneaky bile,
Defaming his opponents,
And misleading by a mile.

It’s Mitt who set the standard:
Once a word’s been said, it’s game.
So if context doesn’t matter,
Here’s to treating Mitt the same.

Political Haiku Quartet

Tuesday, March 1st, 2011

Styrofoam is back.
“Green the Capitol” is gone.
Job, jobs, jobs, jobs, jobs?


Rotund Rush Limbaugh
says Michelle Obama’s fat—
that’s hard to swallow.


Freedom from taxes
demanded by those who crave
what taxes give them.


The mental midget
mentioned an affinity
with Rush — no surprise.


Showing up to vote—
a yearly exercise in
unrequited hope.


(More political haiku here. And more Rush Limbaugh humor here.)

Limerick Ode To John “So Be It” Boehner

Thursday, February 17th, 2011

No doubt you’ve heard about John Boehner’s “so be it” nonchalant reaction to the loss of federal jobs. It seems Boehner’s finished feigning compassion.

This calls for a limerick, don’t you think?

Limerick Ode To John “So Be It” Boehner
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Boehner’s known for his grief-stricken sobs,
For emoting through loose tear duct knobs.
Yet his eyes remain dry,
He refuses to cry
For Americans losing their jobs.

Ode To The Wingnutty Pete Sessions

Tuesday, May 12th, 2009

It sounds like Texas Congressman Pete Sessions could use some … uh … sessions on somebody’s couch.

… Representative Pete Sessions of Texas, may indeed face an uphill fight with his argument that Mr. Obama is not trying to create jobs. In an interview, Mr. Sessions cited rising unemployment in asserting that the administration intended to “diminish employment and diminish stock prices” as part of a “divide and conquer” strategy to consolidate power.

Ode To The Wingnutty Pete Sessions
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Texas Republican Sessions
Likes to conjure up lib’ral transgressions:
Claims Barack to build power
Made stocks and jobs sour.
Pete needs help from the head-shrink professions.

Dear Boss, Where’s My Bonus?

Tuesday, March 17th, 2009

The AIG bonus fiasco has been very enlightening. Giving incompetent employees huge bonuses, so they won’t resign? And with taxpayer cash yet? What a concept!

I think all of us who still have jobs should send our bosses a letter like this:

Dear Boss, Where’s My Bonus? (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Dear boss, where’s my bonus and raise?
I expect lots of cash — no delays.
Though my work surely sucks,
I deserve all those bucks.
Ain’t it great that incompetence pays?