Archive for the ‘Government Services’ Category

Trump Cancels Pelosi War Zone Trip … and the Speaker Responds (Limerick)

Thursday, January 17th, 2019

Headline: “Trump denies Pelosi military aircraft for war zone trip”

Speaker Pelosi’s Limerick Response:

Rumor has it, dear Trump, you were scared
I’d be harmed. “Stop her trip!” you declared.
Using all of your might,
You cancelled my flight.
How sweet! I did NOT know you cared.

If Nancy Pelosi Could Write Limericks

Wednesday, January 16th, 2019

Dear Donald, I see that the state
Of our Union is closed, so the date
That you’re set to appear
In my House (nearly here)
Isn’t great. “Speak” in writing … or wait.

Here’s Nancy’s real letter to Trump.

Donald’s Just-Pretend Emergency (Limerick)

Friday, January 11th, 2019

Trump’s attempting a blackmail-insurgency:
“I’ve the right to declare an emergency.
But I WON’T do it yet.
Right now it’s a threat!” …
Which proves that there’s really no urgency.

Limerick Ode To Our So-Called Deal-Maker

Friday, January 11th, 2019

The self-described deal-maker fails
To close deals. Donald’s thwarted? He bails.
Nancy ties him in knots,
And whenever he spots
Her he’ll plotz, as his orange skin pales.

Trump Walled In By Wall Quote (Limerick)

Thursday, January 10th, 2019

It’s hard not to laugh at this quote from Trump’s 2004 Wagner College commencement address, which inspired my limerick:

I’ll tell you, to me, the second-most important thing after love what you do is never, ever give up. Don’t give up. Don’t allow it to happen. If there’s a concrete wall in front of you, go through it. Go over it. Go around it. But get to the other side of that wall.

There’s a wall of concrete? Then go through it;
That’s the way that the Donald once drew it.
Are walls MEANT to be crossed?
Or built at great cost:
My conclusion is Donald Trump blew it.

Trump Storms Out Of His Own Meeting (Limerick)

Wednesday, January 9th, 2019

Headline: “Trump storms out of meeting as shutdown careens toward fourth week”

The Donald stormed out of the meeting
Cuz his wall scheme was taking a beating.
The Speaker was “mean,”
So he vented his spleen
In a petulant act of retreating.

Donald’s Shutdown (Limerick)

Saturday, January 5th, 2019

Headline: “White House Did Not Understand Shutdown Implications”

The Donald did not comprehend
The great damage a shutdown could send.
This is not a surprise;
Trump’s the inverse of wise,
And his couns’lors kiss Donald’s butt end.

Donald’s Blame Game (Limerick)

Sunday, December 30th, 2018

Dear Donald, you’ll need more than luck
With your efforts at passing the buck;
You could crawl on all fours,
But the shutdown blame’s yours:
You’re the schmuck who’s inflicted this muck.

Limerick Ode To Trump’s Shutdown

Saturday, December 22nd, 2018

The shutdown, dear Donald, is yours.
You broke it; you keep it. The doors
Of the gov have been shut
By YOU! Get your butt
Down to Congress. Concede … on all fours.

Mulvaney And Trump Are Quite The Couple (Limerick)

Saturday, December 22nd, 2018

Headline: “Mick Mulvaney in 2015: Trump’s views on border wall ‘simplistic,’ ‘absurd and almost childish’”

Donald’s wall-pledge is clearly “absurd!”
Don’t take it from me; that’s a word
Mick Mulvaney once used
To describe it. Confused?
So’s the staff-chief now leading Trump’s herd.

Our Shocking News (Limerick)

Friday, December 21st, 2018

The news keeps delivering shocks:
There’s a daily new low for our stocks;
James Mattis resigned;
Trump (as usual) whined;
And we seem to be governed by Fox.

There is plenty more bad news to list,
And the thought of it all makes me pissed.
The government’s closed,
And our nation’s been hosed
By a felon. (Well, you get the gist.)

Shutdown Deal — Schumer Cave? Or Strategery? (Limerick)

Monday, January 22nd, 2018

A promise from Mitch makes me twitch.
Who would bet against glitches or hitch?
Yes a DACA vote pledge
Is worth caca; a hedge
Could turn Schumer from champ to Mitch-bitch.

Will Trump Instigate a Government Shut-Down On Purpose? (Limerick)

Monday, April 24th, 2017

As Disrupter-in-Chief, Trump’s an ace,
And he certainly seems right on pace
To delib’rately cause
A government pause;
A shut-down to placate his base.

For he promised his fans he’d make waves,
Shake things up and then topple the knaves
Who keep government going
And tax money flowing,
Enforcing each reg that enslaves.

But he finds himself deep in a pickle.
His accomplishments? Not worth a nickel
So he needs a big drama;
A gov-shut-down trauma —
Even gullible fans can be fickle.

Undoing Undue Optimism (4-Verse Limerick)

Saturday, October 31st, 2015

Most press coverage about the “cleaning the barn” two-year “budget deal,” negotiated by Boehner as he was handing off his Speaker gig to Paul Ryan, is unduly optimistic. It tends to lull us into thinking that the opportunity for House wingnuts to wreak havoc has been largely eliminated for a substantial period of time.

But that really isn’t true. Why not? Because, generally speaking, there are three broad opportunities for Tea Party types to threaten or cause shutdowns.

1: Budget bills.

2: Debt ceiling crises.

3: Appropriation bills.

And, alas, only the first two items on that list were resolved, leaving ample opportunities for essential appropriation bills to be saddled with unacceptable riders. For instance, riders eliminating Obamacare or defunding Planned Parenthood, to name just two. In other words:

Right-wing Republicans can still pursue their goals through riders on appropriations bills—and, if they don’t get their way, shut down the government.

With Ryan as Speaker, don’t think
That we aren’t stuck right on the brink
Of Tea Party trouble.
It still can cause rubble
Through spending bills yet to gain ink.

The fact that the budget’s resolved
And the ceiling on debt ain’t involved,
Should not make you relieved.
If you are, you’re deceived,
Cuz the poison pill risk isn’t solved.

The House must appropriate cash,
Via bills which the wingnuts can trash
Through riders from guys
With Tea Party ties,
Turning programs we need into ash.

If that happens, then what can be done?
Only vetoes, and those aren’t fun.
But the blackmailing Hill
Can’t prevail on such bill!
Are there any good choices? Nay! None.

Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)

Monday, February 23rd, 2015

Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A government shutdown sounds sordid,
And I’m hoping it’s somehow aborted.
But the House GOP
Views the dangers with glee;
They assume they’ll again be rewarded.

Exchangeable Views (Limerick)

Thursday, October 24th, 2013

Exchangeable Views (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Republican stance is still no:
“Obamacare’s bad and must go.”
So explain why they bitch
That something they’d ditch
Does things they don’t want way too slow.

Doomed Limerick

Thursday, October 17th, 2013

The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.

Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.

Clean Messaging (Limerick)

Tuesday, October 8th, 2013

In President Obama’s October 8 news conference about the current budget and debt ceiling stalemate with Republicans, Obama said: “We can’t make extortion routine as part of our democracy.”

Clean Messaging (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

We can’t make extortion routine,
Said Obama, and that’s why a clean
Bill for spending and debt
Is a requisite get,
Else democracy’s sure to careen.

Limerick Ode To The Government Shutdown

Monday, September 30th, 2013

Limerick Ode To The Government Shutdown
By Madeleine Begun Kane

A government shutdown’s arrived–
An avoidable crisis contrived
By the wingnutty House,
Who blackmail and grouse
Over battles they’ve lost and revived.

Limerick Ode To DOMA’s Demise

Wednesday, March 27th, 2013

Most experts seem to think the U.S. Supreme Court will strike down DOMA, thereby ending the federal ban on benefits to gay spouses. The question is: Will they do it based upon equal protection, or states’ rights? The former (seemingly supported by the four liberal Supremes) is vastly preferable, but the later appears more likely; the perennial swing judge, Justice Anthony Kennedy, is more of a states’ rights kinda guy.

Limerick Ode To DOMA’s Demise
By Madeleine Begun Kane

I’m GLAD to hear DOMA’s in trouble.
But will Justices safe in their bubble
Concede that it’s wrong,
Beat the gong, say so long
To treating gay couples like rubble?