Archive for the ‘Hillary Clinton’ Category

Open Limerick To Donald Trump

Tuesday, June 28th, 2016

Dear Donald, you once would extol
Your rankings in poll after poll.
You’d brag and you’d gloat
And you’d proudly emote
About numbers you loved, heart and soul.

But now that you’re deep in the hole,
With low poll numbers taking their toll,
You scream and you swear
That they’re fake and unfair–
Once a poll-touter, now a poll troll.

Open Letter To Bernie Sanders

Sunday, June 26th, 2016

Dear Bernie: I started out liking you, but preferring Hillary. Over time, my respect for you has gradually declined. However until today, I still thought you were a well-meaning progressive, albeit one with an over-inflated ego and a soupçon of sexism.

But all that has changed as a result of your “performance” today on CNN’s State of the Union. My regard for you now is undoubtedly every bit as low as the “Bernie Or Busters’ regard for Hillary Clinton.

So please don’t bother endorsing Hillary EVER. It’s way too late. Nobody cares!

And by all means please keep up your increasingly obnoxious remarks about Hillary — comments you apparently must spew in order to maintain the media attention you require to get through the day. Because again, NOBODY CARES!

And re your: “We are trying to say to Secretary Clinton and the Clinton campaign, ‘Make it clear which side you are on,’” please get therapy. Your need for it appears desperate.

PS: You LOST!!!

Open Limerick From Trump To His Campaign Team

Wednesday, June 22nd, 2016

My Hillary speech went off great!
And I’m betting that liar’s irate.
I’ll shellack her and whack her,
Attack her and thwack her.
Getting rich in the Oval’s my fate.

Open Limerick To Bernie Sanders from Whoever Runs the Democratic Convention

Sunday, June 19th, 2016

Dear Bernie, feel free to contest
The convention with zeal and with zest.
But in case that you think
We’re naive and will shrink
In your wake, you’ll speak midnight, at best.

Explaining Bernie (Limerick)

Friday, June 17th, 2016

Explain Bernie? I’ll give it a whirl:
He apparently thinks he’s a pearl,
And that Hill and her lot
Are beneath him — worth squat –
Plus he CAN’T bear to lose to a girl.

A Serious Question (Limerick)

Wednesday, June 15th, 2016

It seems possible that Bernie won’t endorse Hillary. Or that he’ll delay his endorsement for so long, that it loses much of its effectiveness. And that makes me wonder how valuable a timely Sanders endorsement really is. And how damaging his non-endorsement might be.

From what I can gather, Bernie supporters fall into three broad categories:

1: Those who’ve said all along that they will vote for whoever gets the Democratic nomination.

2: Those who’ve come to realize that (however they may feel about Hillary) Trump is a dangerous threat to our nation and must be stopped.

3: Bernie Or Busters who are so anti-Hillary, that they turned against Elizabeth Warren, the second she endorsed her.

So, would a reasonably prompt Bernie endorsement have any value beyond the symbolic? That very question inspired this limerick:

An endorsement from Bernie’d be great,
Though I’d ask if it truly has weight;
Donald must be shellacked!
You don’t see this? You’re whacked!
And your Bern love could soon turn to hate.

Donald “4 Pinocchio” Trump Strikes Again (Limerick)

Wednesday, May 25th, 2016

Trump’s “Four Pinocchios” keep mounting up, as The Donald amplifies his conspiracy-theory-fed attacks on Hillary Clinton.

The latest is for suggesting foul play in the (to quote Trump) “fishy” 1993 suicide of Vince Foster.

The Donald will use any source
(Even chain mail from fringe groups, of course)
In attacking a rival.
His key to survival?
Coarse indiff’rence to truth, sans remorse.

Open Double Quatrain To Bernie Sanders

Sunday, May 22nd, 2016

Dear Bernie: Only a candidate who cares more about himself than about our nation, could refer to choosing between Clinton and Trump as “the lesser of two evils.”

“The lesser of two evils” –
That’s the phrasing Bernie used
To describe the coming battle,
Hill v Trump. I’m NOT amused.

Revealing his true colors
In that line for all to hear,
He let bitterness at losing
Spur a reckless, noxious smear.

Open Limerick To Bernie Sanders

Tuesday, May 17th, 2016

I was really hoping that Bernie Sanders would behave like a statesman in the wake of the horrific behavior of Sanders’ supporters in Nevada.

Instead, he released this press release, with only the most mealy-mouthed general criticism of violence — a press release dominated by his own recitation of campaign grievances.

When supporters of yours misbehave
Please don’t act like a put-upon knave.
You should strongly indict
Pro-Bern violence with bite,
And not feed them the pep talk they crave.

Yet Another Open Limerick To Hillary-Haters

Tuesday, May 17th, 2016

You’re a Bernie supporter? That’s fine.
You’re a “Bernie or Buster?” Go whine
And spread lies on some page
That’s more friendly. Vent rage
Against Hill somewhere else. Not on mine!

Open Limerick To Donald Trump From Most Leading Republicans

Sunday, May 1st, 2016

As a running mate, I’d be ideal.
But I’ll never be yours, so get real!
Be advised, I insist:
Keep me off of your list.
Even Hillary has more appeal.

Open Limerick To “Bernie Or Busters”

Friday, April 29th, 2016

I can’t help wondering whether Bernie’s bound to lose his halo:

There are Dems who think Hill fans are dumb.
Seems she’s “evil” and “venal,” to some.
Here’s my question: When Bern
Does back Hill, will they spurn
“Sainted Bern” and demote him to scum?

Open Limerick To Hillary-Haters

Tuesday, April 26th, 2016

The Bernie or Bust meme’s akin
To ensuring a GOP win.
So who is the shill
For vows to spurn Hill?
Karl Rove… or duped Dems drunk on spin?

*****

I’m for Hill, you’ve sussed.
Vote for Bernie, if you must.
Nix “Bernie or Bust.”

Open Limerick to Any Bernie Fan Enraged By My Posts

Wednesday, March 30th, 2016

If Bernie beats Hillary, fine;
I’ll support him and nary a whine
Will I utter or write.
But right now I shall fight.
As for efforts to silence me, “Nein!”

Open Limerick To Bernie Sanders

Tuesday, March 29th, 2016

This limerick was inspired by Bernie Sanders surrogates (like Susan Sarandon) who essentially tell folks NOT to support Hillary if she gets the nomination:

Dear Bernie, the time has now come
To disown and renounce any chum
Who with surrogate clout
Says: If Hill beats Bern out,
Vote for somebody else. She’s a bum.

(Here’s Charles Blow’s excellent video response to Sarandon’s comments.)

In the Soup? Flip Superdelegates (Limerick)

Thursday, March 17th, 2016

Sanders’ Campaign Old Stance re Superdelegates: They’re establishment types who undo the will of the voters.

Sanders’ Campaign Post-5-State-Loss Stance: Flip Clinton’s Superdelegates.

Superdelegates ought to be banned;
They’re unfair and can wrongfully hand
The win to the chick
That the voters don’t pick.
This once was the stance of Bern’s brand.

But now that the voters made clear
That Bernie’s support gap’s severe,
He’s looking to woo
Clinton’s “Sups” to undo
Voter powers he claims to hold dear.

Those Damn Emails! (Limerick)

Saturday, January 30th, 2016

I’m so sick of the news stories meant
To defame Mrs. Clinton with bent,
Sleazy headlines and lies
Told to make you surmise
That her emails were “secret” when sent.

Open Limerick To Martin O’Malley

Sunday, December 20th, 2015

Dear Martin O’Malley, I snickered
And wondered, “Could Martin be liquored?”
Cuz your pre-canned remark,
A don’t-bicker-here bark,
Made no sense because nobody’d bickered.

Note: Here’s the post-debate sub-headline: “O’Malley Bashes Bickering During A Moment Of Peace.”

Yet Another Benghazi Hearing Limerick (2-Verse)

Saturday, October 24th, 2015

That GOP slug-fest of jeering
Was a stamina-trial of a hearing,
For the GOP goal
Was to rattle and roll
HRC. But instead? Pro-Hill cheering.

And for those thinking Clinton’s too old
To be prez, they need only behold
The results of that test
Of endurance — she’d best
Hill’ry’s juniors — Olympian gold!

Limerick Ode To The Benghazi-Obsessed Hillary Haters

Friday, October 23rd, 2015

The Hillary haters are sad.
They were praying that Hill would do bad
At hearings designed
To put Hill in a bind
And malign, wear her down, drive her mad.

But Hillary won in a rout.
Trey Gowdy and co left no doubt
That her rep they must shatter.
To them, facts don’t matter
In their shamef’ly political bout.