The Donald’s been tweeting up a storm over the probe of Trump’s Russia connections.
“Any claims about Russia and me
Are a hoax” — Donald’s latest tweet-spree.
“It’s Hill you should probe!”
Was he wearing a robe
When he threw up this Twitter debris?
Now that Trump’s been sworn in, you would think
Mr. Orange would feel in the pink;
That he’d cease his false claims
And fake voter-fraud flames,
But it seems that the man needs a shrink.
Clinton’s popular vote win’s immense,
Which is making Trump terribly tense.
So he fabricates fraud,
Saying votes for the Broad
By illegals robbed Donald and Pence.
Dear Vlad, I can’t publicly say
How grateful I am. Your display
Of email artillery
Helped me to pillory
Hill’ry. Your bribe’s on the way.
Poor Donald! The best entertainers
Were ardent pro-Clinton campaigners,
Who do NOT want to sing
At Trump’s wingding; They cling
To their stance as Inaug’ral abstainers.
Add Paul Ryan to the long list of Republicans who are just fine with a GOP president who constantly lies:
“‘I have no way of backing that up,’ Paul Ryan says about President-elect Trump’s tweet claiming millions of Americans voted illegally. ‘It doesn’t matter to me. He won the election.’”
Ryan shrugs at Trump’s lies and tall tales.
For instance, when Trump falsely wails
That sham votes by the mil
Were counted for Hill,
Says Ryan: Trump won. All else pales!
Lately I’ve been seeing posts by “Bernie or Buster” Jill Stein supporters whining about the horror that is Donald Trump.
Seems to me they should have thought of that just a wee bit sooner.
Dear “Bernie or Busters” don’t whine
About Trump and the fact he’s a swine.
Your bitching should halt,
Cuz Trump’s win is YOUR FAULT!
Hope your “conscience” is happy with Stein.
There’s a stark double standard from Comey.
(If you don’t think I’m MAD, you don’t know me.)
He proclaims each Hill crumb,
Yet on Trump he stays mum.
So my message to Comey is “Blow me!”
This election is nearing its end
None too soon; I’ve gone plumb round the bend.
I can’t handle more jive.
My mind’s taken a dive.
It needs Hillary’s village to mend.
At a charity, heckling is rare,
But Trump got derision to spare
At the Alfred Smith Dinner.
Trump wasn’t the winner?
“Rigged” booing, no doubt. How unfair!
Donald lost the debate rather “bigly.”
The jig’s up, Mr. “Bigwig.” Your prigly
And pigly deportment
And oddball assortment
Of views “rigged the deal” … and I’m giggly.
It’s all “rigged,” Donald’s loudly contended;
Childish whining, before the game’s ended.
What’s his proof? Trump has none!
He’s undone his own run
Through behavior that can’t be defended.
But to Donald, he’s never to blame;
Not his lies, nor his predator fame
Could ever account
For the polls, as they mount
Against Trump and his Alt-Rightist game.
Will Donald show up to debate
And act crazy, confused, or irate?
Will he spread taller tales,
As he coke-sniffs and wails?
It’s all moot; Trump has sealed his own fate.
Does anyone remember Donald Trump being shackled? Me neither.
And yet here’s Trump on Twitter: “It is so nice that the shackles have been taken off me and I can now fight for America the way I want to.”
It’s time for a two-verse limerick. (5 Lines just aren’t enough.)
Now that Trump’s been “unshackled,” beware:
Donald’s free to be mean as a bear.
Trump the “gentleman’s” done.
Trump the tough guy’s begun;
That’s his threat in an effort to scare.
But this taunt leaves me rather amused,
Because Donald has constantly oozed
Spiteful bile on the stump.
Trump has ALWAYS been Trump,
Spewing lies that are venom-infused.
The debaters are poised for the kill.
(I’m referring to Donald and Hill.)
Here’s the answer we need:
Will The Donald succeed
In changing the villain to Bill?
Trump’s “pussy” apology’s terse!
(The Donald is “sorry” averse.)
“You should give me your votes,”
He shamelessly notes.
“Elect ME, cuz her husband’s done worse.”
Dear Mike Pence, I am duly impressed.
You bested Tim Kaine, I’ll attest.
You’re so cool under fire,
Too bad you’re a liar!
And since when is mendacity blessed?
Donald swallowed Hill’s fat-shaming bait,
Which made him enraged and irate.
So he keeps lashing back
And confirms with each whack
That at lookism, Donald is great.
I keep pacing, and ev’rything’s grating.
I barely can handle the waiting.
I’m shaky and dazed.
My mental state’s crazed.
How fortunate I’M not debating!
Trump’s demands of opponents are vast;
Full disclosure, or else he’s aghast:
Proof of birth, health, and files
From their schools and huge piles
Of their emails, each speech. Do it fast!
But want data from Donald? You chump!
Don’t expect any document dump
Of his taxes and health
Or his “billions” in wealth;
Full disclosure’s for folks Not-Named-Trump.
The media’s biased, ill-bred,
And in bed with that crook who’s ahead.
If I lose, it’s the press
Who’s at fault for my mess.
How dare they report what I’ve said!