Posts Tagged ‘Republicans Humor’

Mitch McConnell’s Hard Job Of Pretending To Work (Limerick)

Monday, May 2nd, 2016

Headline of the Day:

Senate takes 2016 sabbatical
The chamber is in session for the fewest days in 60 years, straining Mitch McConnell’s claim that the chamber is ‘back to work.’

It’s a tough NON-accomplishment race,
But the GOP Senate’s on pace
To work less then it’s ever
Pulled off — this endeavor
Makes “back to work” false on its face.

A Not-So-Fond Farewell to Carly Fiorina (Limerick)

Wednesday, February 10th, 2016

Carly’s gone from the race. I won’t miss her.
Though of course if it’s apt, I’ll still diss her.
And I hope she’ll embrace
Someone else in this race…
Cuz I’d love to see Donald Trump kiss her.

Successful Soul-Searching Is Tough Sans A Soul (Limerick)

Wednesday, December 9th, 2015

Conservatives, bummed and bereft,
Due to Donald Trump’s poll number heft,
After searching their brains
To explain his huge gains,
Found the cause: It’s Barack and the Left!

What REALLY Scares Me (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 8th, 2015

The more loathsome Trump’s statements become,
The more popular Donald’s with some.
It’s not Muslims I fear,
But the folks who hold dear
A vile man who’s both evil and dumb.

What Lies Beneath The Lies (Limerick)

Tuesday, December 1st, 2015

When Republican pols take the stage,
Seems deceit has become all the rage,
Cuz no matter how sordid,
Their lies are rewarded.
Waging war on the truth’s become sage.

Yet Another Benghazi Hearing Limerick (2-Verse)

Saturday, October 24th, 2015

That GOP slug-fest of jeering
Was a stamina-trial of a hearing,
For the GOP goal
Was to rattle and roll
HRC. But instead? Pro-Hill cheering.

And for those thinking Clinton’s too old
To be prez, they need only behold
The results of that test
Of endurance — she’d best
Hill’ry’s juniors — Olympian gold!

Limerick Ode To The Benghazi-Obsessed Hillary Haters

Friday, October 23rd, 2015

The Hillary haters are sad.
They were praying that Hill would do bad
At hearings designed
To put Hill in a bind
And malign, wear her down, drive her mad.

But Hillary won in a rout.
Trey Gowdy and co left no doubt
That her rep they must shatter.
To them, facts don’t matter
In their shamef’ly political bout.

Limerick Ode To Planned Ignorance

Tuesday, October 6th, 2015

Limerick Ode To Planned Ignorance
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Planned ignorance, such is the scheme
That conservatives love — what a dream:
Withhold info that’s needed
And ought to be heeded.
That’s the key to get wins for their team.

Whitewashing textbooks and refusing to allow the CDC to study gun violence are but two examples.

What’s Next Post-Boehner? (Limerick)

Sunday, September 27th, 2015

Will Boehner’s departure appease
The Tea Party’s wingnut-disease?
Or will it embolden
And make them feel golden–
Resolved to bring all to their knees.

John Boehner Tears (Limerick)

Friday, September 25th, 2015

Boehner Tears (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

At Boehner I frequently curse.
He’s inspired much negative verse.
But of this I am sure:
We’ll soon have to endure
A Republican Speaker who’s worse.

I’m No Shrink, But… (Limerick)

Thursday, September 24th, 2015

Says Rubio, “Trump’s insecure.”
That assessment does have some allure.
Is the braggart and gloater
And slick self-promoter
Disguising the fact he’s unsure?

I’m no shrink, so I shouldn’t opine,
But I will. (I’ve been drinking some Rhine.)
Compensation for lacks
Could explain his attacks.
Armchair-whining is done — need more wine.

And He’s Out! (Limerick)

Monday, September 21st, 2015

Scott Walker’s dropped out of the race
Cuz apparently Walker can’t face
Polling way under “1.”
So he’s back to the fun
Of destroying Wisconsin apace.

Yet Another GOP Debate Limerick

Friday, September 18th, 2015

After yesterday’s 3-verser about the 2nd GOP debate, you’d think I’d be done. But apparently not:

How I loathe the “He kept us safe” line.
Jeb’s revived it. How dare he — that swine!
Silly me — I’d have sworn
9-11 was born
On Dub’s watch. Were we safe? I’d say nein.

About Last Night (3-Verse Debate Limerick)

Friday, September 18th, 2015

About Last Night (3-Verse Debate Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

As Wednesday’s debate has laid bare,
Donald Trump can spout naught but hot air;
When policy matters
Come up, he’s in tatters.
No detail — just nonsense … and hair.

All his rivals have views I’d forswear.
But at least they have taken some care
To bolster each stand
With some facts, often canned
And untrue — they know fact-checking’s rare.

Fiorina, it seems, was on fire,
And I have to admit I admire
Her talent for lies,
While she’s eyeing the prize
In the fight I’d call “Braggart v. Liar.”

Pre-Debate Limerick

Wednesday, September 16th, 2015

At this ev’ning’s political rumble
I wonder who’ll fumble or crumble.
Will low numbers like “1″
Make some feel quite undone,
Or be freeing? (At “1″ they can’t tumble.)

Catastrophic Limerick

Thursday, September 10th, 2015

Catastrophic Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane

In theory, we have a democracy,
Though some call it a Christian theocracy.
But whatever you deem
Our land, it would seem
That the GOP goal’s kakistocracy.*

*Kakistocracy is “government by the least qualified or most unprincipled citizens.”

The GOP’s Primary Quandary

Sunday, August 23rd, 2015

The GOP’s Primary Quandary (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

The Republican pols are morose
Cuz The Donald, a man they think gross,
Keeps surging in polls
And defeating their goals.
Basic glitch? Their base LOVES “grandiose.”

My Debate Prediction (Limerick)

Thursday, August 6th, 2015

My Debate Prediction
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Will Trump, while debating, “play nice?”
If he does, Trump will pay a steep price,
Cuz “nice” AIN’T what fans bought;
With just “nice” he’s got naught.
One mild “slight?” He’ll be “Trump” in a trice.

Trump’s Trump Card (Limerick)

Sunday, August 2nd, 2015

Trump’s Trump Card (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

When he’s asked if he’ll run “Independent,”
Trump’s response is with warnings resplendent:
If the RNC’s “fair”
Then I won’t, he’ll declare,
Which explains why Trump-fear is ascendant.

What Can They Be Thinking? (2-Verse Limerick)

Thursday, July 30th, 2015

What Can They Be Thinking? (2-Verse Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane

Gilmore’s entered the race. What a snore!
(Does the GOP really need MORE?)
Sixteen guys and one gal–
Most with no rationale
For believing they’ll get to the fore.

Just what keeps them all willing to stump,
As their poll numbers tumble and slump?
While they stand at the brink,
I suppose most pols think:
“I must surely be better than Trump!”