Posts Tagged ‘Republicans Humor’
Monday, March 2nd, 2015
Most Want President to Have a High School Diploma
A new Public Opinion Polling survey finds that 62% of voters think it’s important for the President to have a high school diploma, compared to only 31% who think it doesn’t matter.
Interesting: “There’s a large partisan divide on the issue: Democrats by an 81%-14% spread think it’s important, while Republicans are evenly divided on the matter at 45%-45%.”
When asked to respond to this poll, Wisconsin Governor Scott Walker said, “Only elitists and ISIS supporters would buy into that requirement, whereas Senator Rand Paul said, “Have I mentioned that I’m a doctor?”
Former Texas Governor Rick Perry, a fellow presidential hopeful, disagreed with both men, saying “Don’t glasses make me look smart?”
*****
UPDATE: I was chagrined to learn that my column has fallen afoul of Poe’s Law. What the heck is Poe’s Law? The “literary adage which stipulates that without a clear indicator of an author’s intended sarcasm it becomes impossible to tell the difference between an expression of sincere extremism and a parody of extremism.”
So for anyone who read this and accepted the poll as real and/or any of the quotes as real, this is hundred percent parody. It was inspired by an actual poll related to whether people believe a U.S. President should have a college degree.
UPDATE 2:
Poe’s Law compressed into a haiku:
In extremist times
reality/parody
appear to have merged.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Education Humor, Election Humor, Fake News, GOP Humor, News Parody, Parodies, Poe's Law, Rand Paul, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Scott Walker
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, Fake News, GOP Humor, News Parodies, Political Limericks, Politics Satire, Rand Paul, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Scott Walker, White House | 3 Comments »
Monday, February 23rd, 2015
Why Republicans Embolden Our Enemies (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
A government shutdown sounds sordid,
And I’m hoping it’s somehow aborted.
But the House GOP
Views the dangers with glee;
They assume they’ll again be rewarded.
Tags: GOP Idiocy, Government Shutdown, Homeland Security, House Republicans, Republicans Humor, Terrorists
Posted in GOP Humor, Government Services, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Terrorism | No Comments »
Tuesday, February 3rd, 2015
Limerick Ode To Science Disbelievers
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican problem with science
Is their members respond with defiance
To facts that are proved.
(Have their brains been removed?)
They spread lies to excuse non-compliance.
*****
Refusing vaccines,
Don’t-Tell-Me-What-To-Doers
now infect us all.
*****
Exodus of thought–
an exodus of science–
the GOP way.
*****
Misinformation
delib’rately spread by Fox–
blindly accepted.
*****
Republican pols–
implacable enemy
of fairness and facts.
******
The truth-challenged pols
have taken over Congress–
therein LIES the rub.
*****
Tags: Anti-Science, Climate Change, Climate Science, Congress Humor, Fox News, Global Warming, GOP, Health Humor, Media Humor, Political Haiku & Senryu, Republicans Humor, Science Haiku, Science Humor, Science Senryu, Vaccine Humor
Posted in Climate Change, Global Warming, Health Satire, Media Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Science Verse | No Comments »
Monday, December 29th, 2014
Having It Both Ways (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Claim “Obama’s economy’s” sick?
Then take credit for upswings? How slick!
But my dear GOPers,
It doesn’t take seers
To know that you really must pick.
Tags: Economy, Economy Satire, Fiscal Crisis, Fiscal Humor, GOP, Obama poem, Republican Hypocrisy, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Hypocrisy Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington | Comments Off
Wednesday, November 19th, 2014
Inconvenient Facts (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republicans love to get traction
By using executive action
As a pretext to jaw:
“Barack breaks the law!”–
Despite similar acts by their faction.
Immigration reform, for example:
Though Bush Senior and Reagan did ample
Such executive acts
It would seem, despite facts,
That on laws only Democrats trample.
Here’s a must-read, if you really want to understand the debate over deportations.
Tags: Barack Obama, Democrats Humor, Deportation Humor, Executive Action, Feigned Outrage, George Bush Sr., GOP, Immigration Humor, Immigration Reform, Republicans Humor, Ronald Reagan
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Immigration Reform, Impeachment Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off
Wednesday, November 19th, 2014
Republican gals
awarded but one House chair–
housekeeping gavel.
Twenty-one gavels–
GOP guys get twenty.
One lone gal “keeps house.”
For those who are keeping score, Rep. Candice Miller is the only woman who will be wielding a gavel in the Republican-controlled House. Twenty committee chairmanships go to guys (mostly white), while the least prestigious one — the House Administration Committee — goes (again) to Miller.
Miller’s committee runs the day-to-day operations of the House. So if there’s a hearing about problems with the House cafeteria or bathrooms, Candice Miller’s “The Man.”
To be fair, the Administration Committee’s other principal function is oversight over federal elections. So I suppose Miller can also hold hearings on how to make it harder for Democrats to vote.
Tags: Candice Miller, Chairmanships, Election Humor, House Administration Committee, House Committees, House Republicans, House Satire, Republicans Humor
Posted in Election Satire, GOP Humor, House Satire, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off
Wednesday, October 22nd, 2014
Chris Christie Wages War On Low-Wage Workers (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Chris Christie says minimum wage
Is too boring — he’s on a new page.
Dare to mention that matter—
He’ll spew out rude chatter.
Suggest raising it? Brace for his rage.
Tags: Chris Christie, GOP, Income Humor, Minimum Wage, Money Humor, New Jersey, Republicans Humor
Posted in Business Humor, Chris Christie, Employment Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Job Humor, Money And Finance Humor, New Jersey Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Wage Humor | Comments Off
Friday, October 3rd, 2014
I’m looking forward to leadership from our Surgeon General, especially now that the Ebola outbreak has reached our nation.
Oh wait … we don’t have one. Why not? Because Vivek Murthy, Obama’s excellent nominee, has the audacity to view guns as a health issue.
What To Do About Ebola? Don’t Ask Our Surgeon General (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Though an expert on health would be nice
At this time of Ebola, no dice!
NRA’s GOP
Blocked a great nominee,
And our nation is paying the price.
Tags: Ebola, Epidemics Limerick, Health Limerick, NRA, Obama Verse, Republicans Humor, Senate Satire, Surgeon General, Vivek Murthy
Posted in Barack Obama, Firearms & Guns Humor, GOP Humor, Health Satire, NRA Limerick, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off
Thursday, October 2nd, 2014
Please don’t rat me out. But while the Secret Service wasn’t looking, I swiped this limerick from President Obama’s desk:
Dear Republicans, thank you for caring.
I’m touched by the worries you’re airing.
Then again, you’ll concede
That my death might impede
Your aspersions on me, now unsparing.
Tags: Obama, Republicans Humor, Secret Service
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | Comments Off
Tuesday, September 30th, 2014
Open Limerick to Charlotte Clinton Mezvinsky
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Dear Charlotte, I hope you’re prepared
For attacks, because war’s been declared.
Though you just got your name,
You’re a Clinton — fair game!
Newborn Hillary-heirs won’t be spared.
Tags: Charlotte Clinton Mezvinsky, Chelsea Clinton, GOP Attack Dogs, GOP Humor, Hillary Clinton, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Hillary Clinton, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Republicans Humor | Comments Off
Wednesday, August 13th, 2014
Although Texas Governor Rick Perry hasn’t announced yet, it’s pretty clear that he’s planning to run for the GOP presidential nomination. Now I don’t know about you, but I’m looking forward to some more juicy “oops” moments.
Amusing bits like this will probably be the least of it:
Perry seemed pumped up after his enthusiastic, heckle-free reception at the Register’s Soapbox. When the Register’s moderator thanked him as he came off the stage, Perry said: “You’re welcome. I’m awesome!”
Limerick Ode To “Awesome” Rick Perry
By Madeleine Begun Kane
“You’re welcome. I’m awesome!” said Perry.
Oops, was Perry pumped up? I’d say, “Very!”
Seems another prez run
By that man will be fun.
No debate, Rick will help us make merry.
Tags: Campaign Satire, Debate Humor, Election Humor, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, Texas, Texas Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Debate Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Rick Perry, White House | Comments Off
Tuesday, August 12th, 2014
This could very well be the silliest limerick I’ve ever written. But when the focal point of a political ad appears to be a horse with a huge penis, I can’t help myself. And if you don’t know what I’m referring to, you simply must take a gander at Gary Kiehne and his well-hung horse.
Horse’s Ass Of A Candidate (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
There once was a horse who was mad
Cuz his penis was used in an ad.
“How dare you imply
I’m endorsing that guy!
Scratch my likeness. That candidate’s bad!”
Tags: Advertising Humor, Arizona, Campaign Satire, Conservatives Satire, Election Humor, Gary Kiehne, GOP Humor, Horse Limerick, Political Ads, Political Advertising, Republicans Humor
Posted in Campaign Humor, Election Satire, GOP Humor, Media Satire, Political Ads, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 1 Comment »
Thursday, June 5th, 2014
Limerick Ode To World Environment Day (June 5)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
World Environment Day has arrived,
Though “Deniers” insist it’s contrived:
This science contention
That sans intervention,
Global warming will leave us short-lived.
Tags: Anti-Science, Climate Change, Climate Science, Deniers, Global Warming, GOP Humor, June Holidays, Odd Holidays, Republicans Humor, Science Humor, World Environment Day
Posted in Global Warming, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Science Satire, Science Verse | Comments Off
Saturday, May 31st, 2014
My 2-verse limerick “celebrates” John Boehner, who certainly knows how to be cowardly, evasive, and stupid all at once. Here’s Boehner responding to a question about climate change:
Asked by reporters yesterday if he accepts the scientific consensus that greenhouse gas emissions contribute to global warming, John Boehner demurred on the curious but increasingly familiar grounds that he is not a scientist. “Listen, I’m not qualified to debate the science over climate change,” the House Speaker said. Boehner immediately turned the question to the killing of jobs that would result from any proposal to reduce greenhouse gas emissions, which he asserts with unwavering certainty. (On this question, Boehner is not held back by the fact that he is also not an economist.)
Limerick Ode To John Boehner
By Madeleine Begun Kane
John Boehner, it seems, knows the score;
He’ll be kicked by his “team” out the door
Should he ever concede
What folks know (if they read)
That our climate is changing full-bore.
So Boehner will simply rebuff
Any queries re climate change stuff.
“Can’t debate it he claims;
His “not qualified” aims
To dodge facts, cuz his pals prefer guff.
Tags: Climate Change, Climate Science, Global Warming, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Republicans Humor
Posted in Climate Change, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Science Verse | 1 Comment »
Monday, May 5th, 2014
Many of you already know that big-time Republican donor John Jordan just dissed Republican pols big time. Here’s what he said:
I go out of my way to avoid meeting candidates and politicians.” Why? “All too often, these people are so disappointing that it’s depressing. Most of these people you meet, they’re unemployable.… It’s just easier not to know.
But I’ll bet you’re unaware of John Jordan’s secret limerick writing talent:
Dear Republicans, here’s tons of cash
From my famously sizeable stash.
I believe you’re all fools,
But can count on you tools
To keep screwing the riff-raff and trash.
(Note from Mad Kane for the Humor-Impaired: I’m John Jordan’s extremely unofficial ghostwriter. )
Tags: Fund Raising, John Jordan, Republicans Humor, Super PACs
Posted in Election Satire, GOP Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | Comments Off
Thursday, December 5th, 2013
According to a Politico story, Republicans pols and staffers are being given remedial sensitivity training to avoid further Todd Akin-style gaffes and to contend with the party’s gender gap.
Those Sensitive Republicans
By Madeleine Begun Kane
Republicans, fearful of gaffes,
Are coaching both Congress and staffs
How to talk to a dame.
(Non-offense is their aim.)
How ’bout policy change, just for laughs?
Tags: Feminism, Gender Gap Humor, GOP Humor, Politico, Republican War On Women, Republicans Humor, Todd Akin
Posted in Congress Humor, Feminism Humor, Gender Politics, GOP Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor | 11 Comments »
Thursday, October 24th, 2013
Exchangeable Views (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
The Republican stance is still no:
“Obamacare’s bad and must go.”
So explain why they bitch
That something they’d ditch
Does things they don’t want way too slow.
Tags: GOP Hypocrisy, Health Care, Health Care Exchanges, Health Insurance, Health Insurance Marketplace, HealthCare.gov, Insurance Humor, Obamacare, Obamacare Repeal, Republican Hypocrisy, Republicans Humor
Posted in Barack Obama, GOP Humor, Government Services, Health Satire, Insurance Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, White House | 2 Comments »
Saturday, October 19th, 2013
How does John Boehner explain away and excuse his role in the government shutdown?
“I got overrun, that’s what happened.”
The “Overrun” Speaker (Limerick)
By Madeleine Begun Kane
What is Boehner’s excuse? He’s got none,
Meekly claiming he “got overrun.”
He could scarcely be weaker;
His job as the Speaker
Is leading — he’s left it undone.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, John Boehner, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, Washington DC
Posted in Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, John Boehner, Leadership Humor, Legislation Humor, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, Tax & Budget Humor, Tea Parties, Washington, Wingnuts | 1 Comment »
Thursday, October 17th, 2013
The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.
Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Furloughed Employees, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate, Washington DC
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Government Services, House Satire, Leadership Humor, Legislation Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Partisanship Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, RNC Humor, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, Tea Parties, Washington, Wingnuts | Comments Off
Doomed Limerick
Thursday, October 17th, 2013The federal government’s reopened and the debt ceiling crisis was averted at the last minute. So the question now is, will this happen again? Alas, many experts believe we’re doomed to have yet another shutdown.
Doomed Limerick
By Madeleine Begun Kane
This crisis is over for now,
But for those who are wiping their brow,
Please keep this in mind:
The very same bind
May in merely three months take a bow.
Tags: Debt Ceiling, Economy Satire, Extortion, Federal Budget, Federal Debt, Federal Default, Furloughed Employees, Government Default, Government Shutdown, House Republicans, Legislation Satire, Republicans Humor, U.S. Senate, Washington DC
Posted in Barack Obama, Economy Humor, Fiscal Policy, GOP Humor, Government Services, House Satire, Leadership Humor, Legislation Humor, Money & Finance Humor, Partisanship Satire, Political Commentary, Political Limericks, Political Verse, Politics Satire, Republicans Humor, RNC Humor, Senate Satire, Tax & Budget Humor, Tea Parties, Washington, Wingnuts | Comments Off